Hashmat Usmani wrote:moHtaramii janaab-e-Zia saahib,

assalaam_o_'alaikum,

ummeed hai ki mizaaj-e-giraamii ba_Khair hoNge,

aapkii yeh nai aur iimproved version Ghazal kii yaqeenan behtareen hai. ab yuN kahiye ki is meN aap ne 4 chaand lagaa diye haiN. bahot Khoob. shukria share karne ka.

vaise, mujhe aapkaa vo original she'r ziyada pasand aayaa thaa jiska misr'a-e-saanii thaa:

mira andaaz e bayaaN aur nikhar saktaa hai

aur haN, ho sakta hai TYPO ho, magar mujhe lagta hai ki aapke maqt'e ke misr'a-s-saanii meN ek lafz "hai" type hone se rah gayaa hai. zara nazr-e-saanii kar lijiiyega. shukria.

ek kaamiiyaab Ghazal par aapko merii jaanib se DheroN mubaarak_baad, gar qubool uftaad!

sara_j wrote:

Star Mind wrote: [
1. Yeh gumaaN, jo k tire dil maiN utar saktaa hai
Dil-e-a'aashiq peh qayaamat sa guzar saktaa hai

waah! bohat khoob.

bahut shukriya saara ji :D

2. To chaman se bhi dabe paaoN guzar baad-e-saHar
Waraq-e-gul bhi, tire haathoN bikhar saktaa hai

bohat khoobsurat !

Thanks alot :D

3. Yeh jo rakhta hai khazeenoN ko chupaa kar teh maiN
Yeh samandar bhi mire dil maiN utar saktaa hai

waah! bohat khoob!

nawaazish :D

4. YouNhi gar , daagh-e-jigar se miree taHSeel rahii
Mira andaaz-e-bayaaN aur nikhar saktaa hai

:D
8)

5. YouN na ho mujh se gureezaN, mire mahtaab-e-jahaaN:!:
Tire gaisoo se ulajh kar hi miraa bakht saNwar saktaa hai

waah waah! mujhe ye shair bohat pasand aaya.

mujhey aap ki ye daad bhi bahut pasand aai. shukriya :D

6. To ne to ishq kiyaa hai, tujhey kyaa gham :Zia:
Basar ab too yeh shab-e-hijr bhi kar saktaa hai:!:

MokhliS : Zia Baloch

bohat khoob zia saahib har shair lajawaab hai zor e qalam aur ziyada.


Saraa ji , aap ka tah-e-dil se mamnoon hoN, k aap ne meri is qadr Hosla-afzaai ki. bahut abhut shukriya

Shummu wrote:

Star Mind wrote: 2. To chaman se bhi dabe paaoN guzar,baad-e-saHar
Waraq-e-gul bhi, tire haathoN bikhar saktaa hai

3. Ye jo rakhtaa hai khazeenoN ko, chupaa kar teh maiN
Ye samandar bhi mire dil maiN utar saktaa hai 8)

4. YouNhi gar daagh-e-jigar se miree taHSeel rahi
Mira andaaz-e-bayaaN aur nikhar saktaa hai 8)

5. YouN na ho mujh se gureezaN, mire mahtaab-e-jahaaN
Tire jalvoN se mira bakht saNwar saktaa hai

7. Na safar kar to, jafaaoN k safeeney maiN kabhi
K wafaaoN ka samandar bhi, biphar saktaa hai

8. Tire kooche ki hawaaoN ka acar hai pyaare
Tira deevaana bhala kaise sudhar saktaa hai

9. Qaafila, faSl-e-bahaar-e-rah-e-ulfat ka Sanam
Jaras-e-dil ki Sadaa par hi tiher saktaa hai

MokhliS : Zia Baloch

Wah bahut khoob Zia sahab..aap ki ghazal ke ye ashaar bahut pasand aaye..daad haazir hai..qubool farmaayein :D


Shumaila

Sumaaila SaaHiba, aap ki izzat-afzaai keleye , aap ka nehaayat mamnoon hoN :D . aap ko to taqreeba" sabhi asha'aar hi pasand aaye haiN. matlab k meri meHnat vasol hogai :D . bahut bahut shukriya

MokhliS : Zia Baloch