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Ghazal: "jis shaKhs ko ..."
Posted: Fri Dec 31, 2004 2:36 am
by irfan abid
aadaab, dosto!
aap sab ko naye saal kii mubaarak.baad! is mahfil meN merii pahlii pesh.kash haazir-e-Khidmat hai. mulaahiza farmaaiye, aur apnii raae se navaaziye.
Ghazal
jis shaKhs ko Khudii ne jhaNjhoRaa hai, dosto!
vo jo bhii kar dikhaaye so thoRaa hai, dosto!
us hii pe khul sakaa hai faqat raaz-e-kaainaat
jis ne tilism-e-zaat ko toRaa hai, dosto!
amvaaj-e-dushmanaaN kii bhalaa kyaa bisaat hai
ham ne to ruKh havaaoN kaa moRaa hai, dosto!
ham ne dikhaa diyaa hai ki faulaad kaa hai jism
jab bhii kisii ne haath maroRaa hai, dosto!
insaaN ne qatl-o-jang se paayii hai jab najaat
rishtaa zameeN kaa chaaNd se joRaa hai, dosto!
haathoN pe haath dhar ke jo baiThe rahe sadaa
kahte haiN vo, naseeb nigoRaa hai, dosto!!
samjho ki un kii umr se ik roz ghaT gayaa
kal par jinhoN ne kaam ko chhoRaa hai, dosto!
kyuuN.kar suKhan asar na kare, harf harf meN
:Abid: ne dil kaa Khuun nichoRaa hai, dosto!
niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:
Posted: Fri Dec 31, 2004 8:12 am
by Hashmat Usmani
moHtaram Irfan saaHib,
assalaam_o_'alaikum,
ummeed hai ki mizaaj-e-giraamii ba_Khair hoNge.
aapkii yeh Ghazal paRhii aur hamesha kii hii taraH is Ghazal se bhi hameN bahot lutf_andoz huye. marHabaa! subHaan Allah! kia kahne! ek ek she'r umda hai aur aapko ek kaamiyaab Ghazal kahne par dili mubaarak-baad, gar qubool uftaad!
aapkii Ghazal paRh kar be-saaKhta yeh gaanaa yaad aa gayaa:
ai'Hsaan mire dil pe tumhaaraa hai, dosto!
yeh dil tumhaare pyaar kaa maaraa hai, dosto!
faqat Khaak_nashiiN,
Hashmat
Khusaamaded Bhyi Irfan Abid Saahib
Posted: Fri Dec 31, 2004 2:45 pm
by Abdullah Nazir
Muhtaram
Bhaayi IRFAN ABID Saahib
Purkhuloos Tasleemaat, :)
Aapki taazah ghazal bahut pasand aayi jiske liye khaksaar kii daad aur mubaarakbad haazir hei.
Ghaliban is ghazal per aap ne nazar-e-caani nahiN kii jiski vajah se matleA ke qaafyaoN meiN "hoRaa" mushtarak hei. JahaN tak mujhe maloom hei is haalat meiN baaqi ashAar ke qaafiyaoN per isi qism kii paabundi zaroori houjaati hei.
jis shaKhs ko Khudii ne jhaNjhoRaa hai, dosto!
vo jo bhii kar dikhaaye so thoRaa hai, dosto!
Baaqi saare ashAar behad pasand aaye.
Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.
Re: Ghazal: "jis shaKhs ko ..."
Posted: Sat Jan 01, 2005 2:38 pm
by Mahtab Qadr
irfan abid wrote:aadaab, dosto!
aap sab ko naye saal kii mubaarak.baad! is mahfil meN merii pahlii pesh.kash haazir-e-Khidmat hai. mulaahiza farmaaiye, aur apnii raae se navaaziye.
Ghazal
jis shaKhs ko Khudii ne jhaNjhoRaa hai, dosto!
vo jo bhii kar dikhaaye so thoRaa hai, dosto!
us hii pe khul sakaa hai faqat raaz-e-kaainaat
jis ne tilism-e-zaat ko toRaa hai, dosto!
amvaaj-e-dushmanaaN kii bhalaa kyaa bisaat hai
ham ne to ruKh havaaoN kaa moRaa hai, dosto!
ham ne dikhaa diyaa hai ki faulaad kaa hai jism
jab bhii kisii ne haath maroRaa hai, dosto!
insaaN ne qatl-o-jang se paayii hai jab najaat
rishtaa zameeN kaa chaaNd se joRaa hai, dosto!
haathoN pe haath dhar ke jo baiThe rahe sadaa
kahte haiN vo, naseeb nigoRaa hai, dosto!!
samjho ki un kii umr se ik roz ghaT gayaa
kal par jinhoN ne kaam ko chhoRaa hai, dosto!
kyuuN.kar suKhan asar na kare, harf harf meN
:Abid: ne dil kaa Khuun nichoRaa hai, dosto!
niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:
waah waah bahut khoob Irfan Abid sahib aapke qawafi ne to kamal kardida waqai aapka haq hai in qafioN ko nibhana , bahut lutf aaya.
shukria
Mahtab Qadr
Posted: Sun Jan 02, 2005 9:00 pm
by irfan abid
Sara sahiba, aadaab!
karam.farmaaii ke liye behad shukr.guzaar huuN! ye aap kaa Khuluus hai jo mujhe aap kii mahfil tak le aayaa, varnaa aaj.kal sherii mahfiloN meN aanaa jaanaa kam hii hotaa hai. Ghazal pasand farmaane kaa shukriya qubuul keejiye!
niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:
Posted: Sun Jan 02, 2005 10:13 pm
by Ibn-e-siddique
Irfan bhai:
aap ki ye ghazal bahot pasand aayee :)
hamaari jaanib se daad qubool farmaaiye :)
amjad
Posted: Mon Jan 03, 2005 12:54 pm
by Shummu
Irfan Abid wrote:
jis shaKhs ko Khudii ne jhaNjhoRaa hai, dosto!
vo jo bhii kar dikhaaye so thoRaa hai, dosto!
us hii pe khul sakaa hai faqat raaz-e-kaainaat
jis ne tilism-e-zaat ko toRaa hai, dosto!
ham ne dikhaa diyaa hai ki faulaad kaa hai jism
jab bhii kisii ne haath maroRaa hai, dosto!
haathoN pe haath dhar ke jo baiThe rahe sadaa
kahte haiN vo, naseeb nigoRaa hai, dosto!!
samjho ki un kii umr se ik roz ghaT gayaa
kal par jinhoN ne kaam ko chhoRaa hai, dosto!
kyuuN.kar suKhan asar na kare, harf harf meN
:Abid: ne dil kaa Khuun nichoRaa hai, dosto!
niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:
Wah Irfan Abid sahab...bahut khoob...zameen itni dilkash lagi..upar se aap ka andaaz-e-bayaaN aur qaafiye ka istimaal bhi qabil-e-taareef hai janaab...khaaskar quoted ash'aar behad pasand aaye....daad haazir hai..qubool farmaayein :)
Shumaila
Posted: Sat Jan 08, 2005 9:38 pm
by irfan abid
Hashmat Sb, Mahtab Sb, Amjad Sb aur Shumaila sahiba, aadaab arz hai!
javaab meN taaKheer kii maazrat chaahtaa huuN. vaqt kii qillat ke baais aap sab ko ek musht javaab tahreer kar rahaa huuN. ummeed hai is be.adabii par aap chashm.poshii iKhtiyaar kareNge. :) aap sab kii daad-o-tahseen ke liye maiN tah-e-dil se shukriya pesh kartaa huuN.
niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:
Posted: Sat Jan 08, 2005 9:47 pm
by irfan abid
muhtaram Nazir Sb, aadaab!
Ghazal par aap kii daad se behad Khushii huii. is navaazish ke liye meraa pur.Khuluus shukriya qubuul farmaaiye!
matle ke qavaafii kii baabat aap ne jo kuchh farmaayaa, vo baareek nuktaa hai, aur aap jaise saahib-e-fan hii se is kii nishaan.dahii kii tavaqqo kii jaa saktii hai. is zimn meN meraa nazariya hasb-e-zel hai.
qaafiye meN harf-e-ravii kaa ta.ayyun karte vaqt maKhluut huruuf ko saalim huruuf kii banisbat muKhtalif Dhang se dekhaa jaanaa chaahiye. maslan merii Ghazal ke matle ke qavaafii :jhaNjhoRaa: aur :thoRaa: meN harf-e-haaye aazaad nahiiN hai, balki apne se pahle ke harf meN maKhluut hai. lihaazaa harf-e-haaye ko harf-e-jeem aur harf-e-te se judaa kar ke nahiiN dekhnaa chaahiye. yaanii mushtarak hissah
Raa: tasleem kiyaa jaanaa chaahiye, :hoRaa: nahiiN. matle meN
Raa: se qabl :jh: aur :th: ke maKhluut huruuf haiN. in meN maktuubii lihaaz se to harf-e-haaye mushtarak hai, lekin sautii lihaaz se kuchh bhii mushtarak nahiiN. in maKhluut huruuf kii aavaazeN utnii hii muKhtalif haiN jitnii :jeem: aur :te: kii. deegar misroN meN
Raa: se qabl deegar huruuf haiN. is lihaaz se is Ghazal ke tamaam qavaafii munaasib haiN.
ab aap kaheNge ki is usuul kii sanad meN kisii kitaab kaa havaalaa diyaa jaaye. :) mushkil ye hai ki mere paas jo bhii thoRaa bahut mavaad hai vo mere ustaad muhtaram kii inaayat hai, jo merii notebook meN zaatii tahreer kii shakl meN mahfuuz hai. lihaazaa maiN kisii kitaab kaa havaalaa dene se qaasir huuN. mere paas Mirza Yaas Azeemabadi kii mash.huur kitaab :chiraaGh-e-suKhan: zaruur hai, aur is ke aaKhirii hisse meN ilm-e-qavaafii par Khaasii tafseel maujuud hai. lekin is mavaad kaa mutaaliah karne par Khaas maKhluut huruuf kii nisbat se mujhe koii ibaarat nazar nahiiN aayii.
niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:
Jee aapka kehnaa durust hei
Posted: Sun Jan 09, 2005 12:37 pm
by Abdullah Nazir
Bhaayi
[uIRFAN ABID Saahib[/u]
Purkhuloos Tasleemaat, 8)
Aapka tafseeli javaab paRhkar bahut khushi houi. Aap ne jo bhi farmaaya hei us se maiN bilkul muttafiq hooN. Isko IeeTa-e-khafi kehte heiN aur asaatizah ke kalaam meiN maujood hei. Faarsi aur urdu meiN asaatizah ke kalaam ko nazar meiN rakhte houe isko jaayiz qaraar diyaa gayaa hei.
Aap ne jo farmayaa ke agar qaafiye ka lafz murakkab hou aur uskaa aik kaamil juzo mushtarak hou tou usko ieeTaa-e-jalii kehte heiN jo ahl-e-ilm-e arooz ke khayaal meiN bilkul mamnooA hei.
Baz loagaoN ne tou ieeTaa-e-jali ko bhii jaayiz qaraar diyaa hei.
Meri apni shakshi raaye aAdaad o shumaar per mabni hei. Agar kahiN kahiN ieeTaa-e-khafi yaa ieeTaa-e-jali kaa vurood houaa hei tou usko aik qaaidah tasleem karlena meri haqeer nazar meiN aik khaTaa hei.
Waise naye shoAaraa ne tou her qism ke usoolaoN kaa qatl-e-Aam kardiyaa hei. Nazm ko nacr tak pahonchaadiya aur naam dia nacri nazm. Ghazal ko aazaad ghazal tak pahonchaadiyaa. Housaktaa hei ke kisi din nacr ko shayeri samjhaa jaayegaa.
Meri shakhsi raaye jiskaa ilmiyat se koiee taAlluq nahiN hei, yeh hei ke kam se kam kuhnah mashq shayer aur shayerah ko IeeTaa-e-khafi aur Jali, dounon se hii ijtinaab karnaa chaahiye. Agar nau mashq shaayer yaa shayeraat aisi paabundi nah karsakeN tou koiee baat nahiN lekin kam uz kam aisi maloomaat unke ilm meiN laayi jaani chaahiyeN.
MaiN is fikri ikhtilaaf kaa siwaaye apne kisi aur ko paabund nahiN samajhtaa. Shukriyah.
Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.