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Guzarish 27 -------------- Muhammad K. Siddiqui

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Guzarish 27 -------------- Muhammad K. Siddiqui

Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 2:50 pm
by muhammad_19k
Tamam yaaraan e bazm ko salam,

chooNke safar meiN hooN iss leeaye koi khaaS iraadaa na thaa is bar tarHi moshairay ke leeaye kuch likhne ka. Laikin ustaad e mohtaram Janab Nazir SaHeb ki ghazal daikhi to dil kiyaa ke kuch likh hi dooN. do chaar sha'er pehlay ke likh rakhay thay. do chaar oar Daal kar aik ghazal ki Soorat day di hai.

ustaad e mohtaram chooNke ISlaaH naheeN day rahay abhi. iss leeaye aap log ke tabSiraa ki zaroorat se zydaa zaroorat hai :-)


GHAZAL
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Faqat shauq e janooN meiN khaak aor chhaani naheeN jaati
miray dil muj se tairi baat ab maani naheeN jaati

2. hoee poori kabhi na aarzoo koi magar phir bhi
shab e gham aarzo-oaN ki farawaani naheeN jaati

3. kabhi mojoaN ne aa kar josh meiN rondaa* thaa saaHil ko
patakhti sir haiN ab apnaa pashemaani naheeN jaati

4. huwaa jo shor jannat meiN ko sheereeN sheer maaNge hai
uthaa farhaad ka shaiwaa, khu-aye Caani naheeN jaati

5. tiray koochay ki uR kar khaak jo choomay ko-ii chehraa
phir us ke b'aad us chehre ki taabaani naheeN jaati

6. wo heeraaN haiN mirii nazraiN tikii rehteeN haiN kyooN un par?
mujhe hairat hai kyooN un ki yey heerani naheeN jaati.

7. pas-e-aa-eena hai yey kon mujh ko taktaa hairat se?
mirii Soorat bhalaa kia us se pehchani naheeN jaati.

8. juloo meiN lay ke aayaa hooN meiN gard o baaraaN rastay kay
karooN kia ub bhi ye aadat sulemaani naheeN jaati

9. hai kaRwi baat ye :khawar: magar such hai so kehni hai
agar mai pee le ko-ii toa musalmaani naheeN jaati.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------


aap ki rehnamai ka taalib,
muhammad k. Siddiqui

Posted: Fri Apr 20, 2007 11:39 am
by Shummu
Muhammad K. Siddiqui wrote:
1. Faqat shauq e janooN meiN khaak aor chhaani naheeN jaati
miray dil muj se tairi baat ab maani naheeN jaati
wahhhhhhhhh umda matla!!!!!
2. hoee poori kabhi na aarzoo koi magar phir bhi
shab e gham aarzo-oaN ki farawaani naheeN jaati
acchi giraah hai!
3. kabhi mojoaN ne aa kar josh meiN rondaa* thaa saaHil ko
patakhti sir haiN ab apnaa pashemaani naheeN jaati
bahut khoob..!!! 'raundaa' lafz achcha laga...
5. tiray koochay ki uR kar khaak jo choomay ko-ii chehraa
phir us ke b'aad us chehre ki taabaani naheeN jaati
ky baat hai..wah..!
6. wo heeraaN haiN mirii nazraiN tikii rehteeN haiN kyooN un par?
mujhe hairat hai kyooN un ki yey heerani naheeN jaati.
wah wah kya lafzon ki takraar aur taal mel hai..khoob...!!!


daad pesh hai Khawar sahab...ghazal ke ye ashaar bahut pasand aaye... :rose

shumaila

Posted: Fri Apr 20, 2007 2:15 pm
by muhammad_19k
saaraa ji and shammu ji

aap ki pazeerai ka shukriyaa

mamnoon,
Muhamamd K. Siddqui.

Posted: Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:37 pm
by Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar

A'zeezam biradaram Janab M. Khawar SaHib tasleem! :-)

aaj hee aap kee Ghazal dekh~ne ka maoqa' mila. aor mujh~e i'lm bh~ee hai keh aap is waqt safar meN haiN. kaha jata hai keh safar waseelah-e-z^afar hota hai. aap kee kaamyaab Ghazal dekh~ kar is baat kee gaoya taSdeeq ho gaee. keh jis kamyaabee aor z^afar ka zikr kahaawat meN kiya ja raha hai. woh AahaNg-e-khush kun meN Dh~al kar dil-o-dimaaGh ko naGhmah-o-geet ke suroor aor kaef se hamkinaar kar rahee hai. aor aap baRee kamyabee se Ghazal kee tajribah gah se aek kamyaab tajribah kar ke nikal rahe haiN. aor apne saath~ 9 she'roN kee shakl meN khushbu se labrez guldastah-e-Ghazal pesh karne ke ehtaamaam gar haiN.


1. Faqat shauq e janooN meiN khaak aor chhaani naheeN jaati
miray dil muj se tairi baat ab maani naheeN jaati

wah,

2. hoee poori kabhi na aarzoo koi magar phir bhi
shab e gham aarzo-oaN ki farawaani naheeN jaati

Bohot khob waah,waah,waah.waah

3. kabhi mojoaN ne aa kar josh meiN rondaa* thaa saaHil ko
patakhti sir haiN ab apnaa pashemaani naheeN jaati

achch~ee koshish hai!

4. huwaa jo shor jannat meiN ko sheereeN sheer maaNge hai
uthaa farhaad ka shaiwaa, khu-aye Caani naheeN jaati

wah!

5. tiray koochay ki uR kar khaak jo choomay ko-ii chehraa
phir us ke b'aad us chehre ki taabaani naheeN jaati

kiya kehne waah waah!

6. wo heeraaN haiN mirii nazraiN tikii rehteeN haiN kyooN un par?
mujhe hairat hai kyooN un ki yey heerani naheeN jaati.

wah!

7. pas-e-aa-eena hai yey kon mujh ko taktaa hairat se?
mirii Soorat bhalaa kia us se pehchani naheeN jaati.

waah!

8. juloo meiN lay ke aayaa hooN meiN gard o baaraaN rastay kay
karooN kia ub bhi ye aadat sulemaani naheeN jaati

wah!

9. hai kaRwi baat ye :khawar: magar such hai so kehni hai
agar mai pee le ko-ii toa musalmaani naheeN jaati.

kiya kehne waah waah, :-)

jahaaN tak takneekee dao pech ka sawaal hai. to woh to aap mujh~ se behtar samajh~te haiN. so is silsilah meN qeel-o-qaal karna is majmua'-e-gul-o-Ghunchah ko bikh~erne ke miSdaaq ho ga. haaN agar koee nuqt^ah sanj waqt nikaal kar iz^haar-e-raYe kare to dilchaspee se khalee nah ho ga. maiN sar-e-dast dad-o-teHseen par hee iktefa karte huwe aap ko dad aor mubarak baad pesh karta hooN.

zeyadah Hadd-e-adab!

Muz^affar A Muz^affar

Posted: Sat Apr 21, 2007 5:45 pm
by sbashwar
Mohtaram Khawar Sahib
:salaam:
Allah aapka safar asaan kare. :ameen:

1. Faqat shauq e janooN meiN khaak aor chhaani naheeN jaati
miray dil muj se tairi baat ab maani naheeN jaati

Yeh sheir par jitni bhi daad di jai kam hai. Wah Wah

2. hoee poori kabhi na aarzoo koi magar phir bhi
shab e gham aarzo-oaN ki farawaani naheeN jaati

Wah Wah bohat khoob

3. kabhi mojoaN ne aa kar josh meiN rondaa* thaa saaHil ko
patakhti sir haiN ab apnaa pashemaani naheeN jaati

Yeh sheir bhi bohat umda hai. Wah

4. huwaa jo shor jannat meiN ko sheereeN sheer maaNge hai
uthaa farhaad ka shaiwaa, khu-aye Caani naheeN jaati


5. tiray koochay ki uR kar khaak jo choomay ko-ii chehraa
phir us ke b'aad us chehre ki taabaani naheeN jaati

Wah Wah

6. wo heeraaN haiN mirii nazraiN tikii rehteeN haiN kyooN un par?
mujhe hairat hai kyooN un ki yey heerani naheeN jaati.

Sheir achcha laga. Wah

7. pas-e-aa-eena hai yey kon mujh ko taktaa hairat se?
mirii Soorat bhalaa kia us se pehchani naheeN jaati.

Kya kehne, bohat khoob

8. juloo meiN lay ke aayaa hooN meiN gard o baaraaN rastay kay
karooN kia ub bhi ye aadat sulemaani naheeN jaati

Wah

9. hai kaRwi baat ye :khawar: magar such hai so kehni hai
agar mai pee le ko-ii toa musalmaani naheeN jaati.

Sheir achcha hai. Allah mahfouz rakhey. "ameen:

Meri dili daad aur mubarakbaad qubool farmayeN.

Re: Guzarish 27 -------------- Muhammad K. Siddiqui

Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 7:25 am
by haamidbaaqri
muhammad_19k wrote:Tamam yaaraan e bazm ko salam,

chooNke safar meiN hooN iss leeaye koi khaaS iraadaa na thaa is bar tarHi moshairay ke leeaye kuch likhne ka. Laikin ustaad e mohtaram Janab Nazir SaHeb ki ghazal daikhi to dil kiyaa ke kuch likh hi dooN. do chaar sha'er pehlay ke likh rakhay thay. do chaar oar Daal kar aik ghazal ki Soorat day di hai.

ustaad e mohtaram chooNke ISlaaH naheeN day rahay abhi. iss leeaye aap log ke tabSiraa ki zaroorat se zydaa zaroorat hai :-)


GHAZAL
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Faqat shauq e janooN meiN khaak aor chhaani naheeN jaati
miray dil muj se tairi baat ab maani naheeN jaati

2. hoee poori kabhi na aarzoo koi magar phir bhi
shab e gham aarzo-oaN ki farawaani naheeN jaati

3. kabhi mojoaN ne aa kar josh meiN rondaa* thaa saaHil ko
patakhti sir haiN ab apnaa pashemaani naheeN jaati

4. huwaa jo shor jannat meiN ko sheereeN sheer maaNge hai
uthaa farhaad ka shaiwaa, khu-aye Caani naheeN jaati

5. tiray koochay ki uR kar khaak jo choomay ko-ii chehraa
phir us ke b'aad us chehre ki taabaani naheeN jaati

6. wo heeraaN haiN mirii nazraiN tikii rehteeN haiN kyooN un par?
mujhe hairat hai kyooN un ki yey heerani naheeN jaati.

7. pas-e-aa-eena hai yey kon mujh ko taktaa hairat se?
mirii Soorat bhalaa kia us se pehchani naheeN jaati.

8. juloo meiN lay ke aayaa hooN meiN gard o baaraaN rastay kay
karooN kia ub bhi ye aadat sulemaani naheeN jaati

9. hai kaRwi baat ye :khawar: magar such hai so kehni hai
agar mai pee le ko-ii toa musalmaani naheeN jaati.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------


aap ki rehnamai ka taalib,
muhammad k. Siddiqui
Assalaam o alaikum
mohtaram mohammed khawar sahib

aapki yeh kaavish hameN pasand aayee.

khaaskar girah

dilee daad qubool farmaayeN :clap01:

allah(sbhnwt)karay zoray qalam aur ziyaadah

mukhlis
haamidbaaqri

Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 8:00 am
by muhammad_19k
Mein

JANAB MUZAFFAR AHMED MUZAFFAR SAHEB
JANAB SALEEM BASHWAR SAHEB
OAR


JANAB HAAMID BAAQRI SAHEB ka mamnoon hooN ke unhoaN ne mairi ghazal paRhi, pasand farmai aor HaSla afazai ki.

Khaksaar,
MUHAMMAD K. SIDDIQUI

Re: Guzarish 27 -------------- Muhammad K. Siddiqui

Posted: Sun Apr 29, 2007 7:37 am
by Rehana.A
muhammad_19k wrote:Tamam yaaraan e bazm ko salam,

chooNke safar meiN hooN iss leeaye koi khaaS iraadaa na thaa is bar tarHi moshairay ke leeaye kuch likhne ka. Laikin ustaad e mohtaram Janab Nazir SaHeb ki ghazal daikhi to dil kiyaa ke kuch likh hi dooN. do chaar sha'er pehlay ke likh rakhay thay. do chaar oar Daal kar aik ghazal ki Soorat day di hai.

ustaad e mohtaram chooNke ISlaaH naheeN day rahay abhi. iss leeaye aap log ke tabSiraa ki zaroorat se zydaa zaroorat hai :-)


GHAZAL
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Faqat shauq e janooN meiN khaak aor chhaani naheeN jaati
miray dil muj se tairi baat ab maani naheeN jaati

2. hoee poori kabhi na aarzoo koi magar phir bhi
shab e gham aarzo-oaN ki farawaani naheeN jaati

3. kabhi mojoaN ne aa kar josh meiN rondaa* thaa saaHil ko
patakhti sir haiN ab apnaa pashemaani naheeN jaati

4. huwaa jo shor jannat meiN ko sheereeN sheer maaNge hai
uthaa farhaad ka shaiwaa, khu-aye Caani naheeN jaati

5. tiray koochay ki uR kar khaak jo choomay ko-ii chehraa
phir us ke b'aad us chehre ki taabaani naheeN jaati

6. wo heeraaN haiN mirii nazraiN tikii rehteeN haiN kyooN un par?
mujhe hairat hai kyooN un ki yey heerani naheeN jaati.

7. pas-e-aa-eena hai yey kon mujh ko taktaa hairat se?
mirii Soorat bhalaa kia us se pehchani naheeN jaati.

8. juloo meiN lay ke aayaa hooN meiN gard o baaraaN rastay kay
karooN kia ub bhi ye aadat sulemaani naheeN jaati

9. hai kaRwi baat ye :khawar: magar such hai so kehni hai
agar mai pee le ko-ii toa musalmaani naheeN jaati.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------


aap ki rehnamai ka taalib,
muhammad k. Siddiqui


Khawar sahib!
tesleemaat

aap ki ghazal nazar nawaz hu.ee ,go mairi tabiat is waqt achhi nahien thi aur nieand bhi isi wajah say nahien aarhi thi ,soocha kiuon nah apna wada poora kar doon ,site par aa,i aap ki ghazal hi par sub say pahlay nazar paree aur paRh kar dil khush ho gya .daad o mubarakbaad qabool kijiay :-) mazaameen aalaa haien thooRa thooRa kahien kahien moanvee agar ikhtaaf ho mojhay to aap buraa to nah maanay gay? :-)

araz kartee hoon

1. Faqat shauq e janooN meiN khaak aor chhaani naheeN jaati
miray dil muj se tairi baat ab maani naheeN jaati

Janoon ka shauq mairay khyaal mien kisi ko hota nahien,balka yeh ho jaya karta hey :-)( soochiay ga)
aur phir Haalat janoon mien atni sudh budh?kah dil ko lalkaara ja,ay kah ab tairi baat nahien maani ja saktee?kuch sumjh nahien sakee do baateen
awwel Shauq e janoon ?yaani aap ko janoon nahien janoon ka ka shauq hi hey, mohubbat aur us mien yeh banaweT? mahboob ko patta nah chalnay dijiay ga kahien kay nah rahien gay :-)

2. hoee poori kabhi na aarzoo koi magar phir bhi
shab e gham aarzo-oaN ki farawaani naheeN jaati

buhut khuob,raat ko pooree tawjoh di ja saktee hey, kisi masslay par .Haqeeqat say qareeb hi yeh sher,buhut khuob. :-)

3. kabhi mojoaN ne aa kar josh meiN rondaa* thaa saaHil ko
patakhti sir haiN ab apnaa pashemaani naheeN jaati
buhutkhuob :rose

4. huwaa jo shor jannat meiN ko sheereeN sheer maaNge hai
uthaa farhaad ka shaiwaa, khu-aye Caani naheeN jaati

Khuo-aye Caani, kuch sumjh nahien sakee jahaan tak mairi naqas sumjh hey maira khyaal hey ka caani ka matlab duosra ya duosaree hi ho sakta hey yahaan puraani (agar bandh sakta ho to) lagaya ja sakta hey jis say aap ka woh matlab poora Saaf hoga jo aap kahna chahtay haien ,magar caani nahien ,is ka matlab to yeh nikal raha hey kah Farhad ki ko,i khuo e awwal bhi hey.............waghaira waghaira

5. tiray koochay ki uR kar khaak jo choomay ko-ii chehraa
phir us ke b'aad us chehre ki taabaani naheeN jaati

6. wo heeraaN haiN mirii nazraiN tikii rehteeN haiN kyooN un par?
mujhe hairat hai kyooN un ki yey heerani naheeN jaati.

buhut khoob ,buhut hi khoob :-)

7. pas-e-aa-eena hai yey kon mujh ko taktaa hairat se?
mirii Soorat bhalaa kia us se pehchani naheeN jaati.

khoob

8. juloo meiN lay ke aayaa hooN meiN gard o baaraaN rastay kay
karooN kia ub bhi ye aadat sulemaani naheeN jaati

baad o baraan rastay kay mairi nazar mien zydaha monasib rahta kiuon kah ji rastay par baaraan ho wahaan gard kahaan ?ulbata baad ka hona momkin hey ,ab aap ko jo marzee ho ,kalaam aap ka hey. :-)

9. hai kaRwi baat ye :khawar: magar such hai so kehni hai
agar mai pee le ko-ii toa musalmaani naheeN jaati.

buhut hi khuobsuorat mazmoon ko intahaa,i khuobsuortee say baanda hey aap nay mubarak ho.

aik guzarish karon gee kah agar ko,i baat achhi nah lagee ho to mairi kam fehmi sumjh kar dar guzar kar dijiay ga .matlab maira tanqeed hargiz nahien hey ,serf apni sooch aap say baanTna maqSood hey.

so ab ijazat ,nai ghazal par phir molaqaat hogee ,inshAllah.

Posted: Tue May 01, 2007 5:32 am
by Star Mind
moHtaram janaab Khawar SaaHib, aadaab !

aap kii Ghazal se to go k bahut pehle lutf-andoz hovaa hooN , magar kuchh likhne ki naubat naheeN aa'ii ! jis ke liye aap se tah-e-dil se ma'zirat Khaah hooN !
jaisa k aap jaante haiN k maiN koi nukta-sanj naheeN k Ghazal ke fannii pehlo''oN par apnii raaye de sakooN , maiN to Tehraa Khud aek tifl-e-maktab ! jise abhii Khud aise ahl-e-i'lm ki rahnumaa'ii kii zaroorat hai ! so maiN sivaa-e-daad ke aur kyaa de saktaa hooN ??

ab daad kii baat niklii hai to janaab DheroN daad qubool kejiye ! aap kii Ghazal vaqi'atan hameN pasand aa'ii hai ! ummeed hai k aap ka kalaam isii taraH hameN lutf-andoz kartaa rahe gaa ! shukriya :)

Zia Baloch

Re: Guzarish 27 -------------- Muhammad K. Siddiqui

Posted: Wed May 02, 2007 6:45 am
by muhammad_19k
MOHTARMA O AZEEZA REHANAA SAHIBA.


aap ka tafseeli tabSira paRh kar be intehaa khushi hoee. agar aap dost ehbaab aap ki taraH tabSiraa farmateiN rahaiN to bohat jald theek ho jaa-ooN ga :grin:


kuch bataiN jin ki wazaHat ki jaa sakti hai
aik guzarish karon gee kah agar ko,i baat achhi nah lagee ho to mairi kam fehmi sumjh kar dar guzar kar dijiay ga .matlab maira tanqeed hargiz nahien hey ,serf apni sooch aap say baanTna maqSood hey.


ji bus aap ki yehi baat buri lagi :-). aap mairi ghazal par apna qeemti waqt Sarf kar raheeN haiN aor phir bhi Darti haiN ke mujhe kuch buraa lagay ga? aisa har giz na sochaa karaiN. apni baat Datt kar kahaaN karaiN aor agar kissi ko buri lagti hai to ye us ki samajh ka kusur ho ga.

1. Faqat shauq e janooN meiN khaak aor chhaani naheeN jaati
miray dil muj se tairi baat ab maani naheeN jaati

Janoon ka shauq mairay khyaal mien kisi ko hota nahien,balka yeh ho jaya karta hey :-)( soochiay ga)
aur phir Haalat janoon mien atni sudh budh?kah dil ko lalkaara ja,ay kah ab tairi baat nahien maani ja saktee?kuch sumjh nahien sakee do baateen
awwel Shauq e janoon ?yaani aap ko janoon nahien janoon ka ka shauq hi hey, mohubbat aur us mien yeh banaweT? mahboob ko patta nah chalnay dijiay ga kahien kay nah rahien gay :-)
mein aap ki is raa-aye ke leeaye beHad shukrguzaar hooN. dobaraa bhi sochooN ga. jub ye sh'er likhaa toa zehn meiN thaa ke kuch aashiqoaN ki kafiyaat badalti rehti haiN. ye aik aisay hi aashiq ki baat hai. jo shouq o junooN ke safar meiN khud ko thakaa huwaa meHsoos kar rahaa hai. daikhiaye shikwaa to aashiq kartay hi haiN na? ye bhi aik shikwa hi hai. Aor dil choonke meHboob ke zaire acar hai. iss leeaye meHboob se shikwa barah e dil hai.
2. hoee poori kabhi na aarzoo koi magar phir bhi
shab e gham aarzo-oaN ki farawaani naheeN jaati

buhut khuob,raat ko pooree tawjoh di ja saktee hey, kisi masslay par .Haqeeqat say qareeb hi yeh sher,buhut khuob. :-)
meiN samajh naheen sakaa ke raat ke khasoosi zikr aap mujhe kia ishaara dainaa chah rahi haiN?
4. huwaa jo shor jannat meiN ko sheereeN sheer maaNge hai
uthaa farhaad ka shaiwaa, khu-aye Caani naheeN jaati

Khuo-aye Caani, kuch sumjh nahien sakee jahaan tak mairi naqas sumjh hey maira khyaal hey ka caani ka matlab duosra ya duosaree hi ho sakta hey yahaan puraani (agar bandh sakta ho to) lagaya ja sakta hey jis say aap ka woh matlab poora Saaf hoga jo aap kahna chahtay haien ,magar caani nahien ,is ka matlab to yeh nikal raha hey kah Farhad ki ko,i khuo e awwal bhi hey.............waghaira waghaira
kho-aye caani meiN ne aadaat e caania se lainay ki koshish ki hai. aor maire zahn meiN aadaat e caania ka matlab aisi aadat hai jis ke baghair aadmi reh na saktaa ho. ye pehli, doosri waalaa silsalaa to mujhe check karna paRay ga.

8. juloo meiN lay ke aayaa hooN meiN gard o baaraaN rastay kay
karooN kia ub bhi ye aadat sulemaani naheeN jaati

baad o baraan rastay kay mairi nazar mien zydaha monasib rahta kiuon kah ji rastay par baaraan ho wahaan gard kahaan ?ulbata baad ka hona momkin hey ,ab aap ko jo marzee ho ,kalaam aap ka hey. :-)
sach baat hai ke gard o baraaN wali tarkeeb par meiN kuch aisaa confident naheeN hooN. aor phir sulemani bhi koi achcha tajarbaa naheen rahaa is leeye sh'er meiN ghazal se khaarij kar dooN ga. waise aik baat hai. safar itnaa chhotaa na thaa ke sirf baad o baaraaN tak meHdood rehtaa. ;-). pehlay woh baarish aor keechaR meiN chaltaa rahaa hai aor phir kaafi din tak gard o ghubaar meiN :-)

aor meiN aapne aap ko bohat khushqismat meHsoos kartaa hooN ke aap jaisi a'alaa zouq rakhne wali shaa'iraa ko mire kuch ashaar pasand aa-aye. un par aap ki daad par meiN phoolaa naheeN samaataa.

aap ke tamaaml alfaaz ke leeaye shukrguzar,

MUHAMMAD K. SIDDIQUI.

Posted: Wed May 02, 2007 6:49 am
by muhammad_19k
MOHTARAM JANAB ZIA BALOCH SAHEB,

aap ne likhaa
Star Mind wrote:moHtaram janaab Khawar SaaHib, aadaab !

aap kii Ghazal se to go k bahut pehle lutf-andoz hovaa hooN , magar kuchh likhne ki naubat naheeN aa'ii ! jis ke liye aap se tah-e-dil se ma'zirat Khaah hooN !
jaisa k aap jaante haiN k maiN koi nukta-sanj naheeN k Ghazal ke fannii pehlo''oN par apnii raaye de sakooN , maiN to Tehraa Khud aek tifl-e-maktab ! jise abhii Khud aise ahl-e-i'lm ki rahnumaa'ii kii zaroorat hai ! so maiN sivaa-e-daad ke aur kyaa de saktaa hooN ??

ab daad kii baat niklii hai to janaab DheroN daad qubool kejiye ! aap kii Ghazal vaqi'atan hameN pasand aa'ii hai ! ummeed hai k aap ka kalaam isii taraH hameN lutf-andoz kartaa rahe gaa ! shukriya :)

Zia Baloch

aap mirii ghazal se lutf andoz huway, miray leeaye bohat khushi ki baat hai. ye mujhe aaj hi pataa chalaa ke aap nuqta sanj naheeN haiN :-)

aap ki daad ke leeaye shukrguzaar hooN.

mamnoon,
MUHAMMAD K. SIDDIQUI.

Re: Guzarish 27 -------------- Muhammad K. Siddiqui

Posted: Thu May 03, 2007 5:29 am
by jawaid badauni
muhammad_19k wrote:
Tamam yaaraan e bazm ko salam,

chooNke safar meiN hooN iss leeaye koi khaaS iraadaa na thaa is bar tarHi moshairay ke leeaye kuch likhne ka. Laikin ustaad e mohtaram Janab Nazir SaHeb ki ghazal daikhi to dil kiyaa ke kuch likh hi dooN. do chaar sha'er pehlay ke likh rakhay thay. do chaar oar Daal kar aik ghazal ki Soorat day di hai.

ustaad e mohtaram chooNke ISlaaH naheeN day rahay abhi. iss leeaye aap log ke tabSiraa ki zaroorat se zydaa zaroorat hai :-)

Ab bohat taKheer ho chuki hai aur Mushairah 28 ka e'laan bhee ho chuka hai. Aise meN puraaneee Ghazal per tabsarah kya karooN lekin aap ke Hukm ki taAmeel tou baharHaal karna hai.


GHAZAL
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1. Faqat shauq e janooN meiN khaak aor chhaani naheeN jaati
miray dil muj se tairi baat ab maani naheeN jaati
Achcha matla hai. Faqat shauq.e junooN ki jagah "rah.e shauq.e junooN paRh ker dekhiye kaisa lagat hai!

2. hoee poori kabhi na aarzoo koi magar phir bhi
shab e gham aarzo-oaN ki farawaani naheeN jaat
Achchee tazmeen hai magar pahla misra utna chust nahiN. Doosrey miSrey ke saath yeh aur bhee kamzor lagta hai.

3. kabhi mojoaN ne aa kar josh meiN rondaa* thaa saaHil ko
patakhti sir haiN ab apnaa pashemaani naheeN jaati
Khyaal achcha hai magar yahaN bhee bandish ke e'tbaar se
miSraa.e Sanee kamzor lagta hai.
4. huwaa jo shor jannat meiN ko sheereeN sheer maaNge hai
uthaa farhaad ka shaiwaa, khu-aye Caani naheeN jaati
Apne mazmoon ko kuch aur Saaf kar lete aur behtar tha.
5. tiray koochay ki uR kar khaak jo choomay ko-ii chehraa
phir us ke b'aad us chehre ki taabaani naheeN jaati
Wah wah. Aap ka iradah kuch bhi ho maiN to is sher ko nAAt ki taraf le gaya aur bohat lutf andoz huuwa. SubHaan Allah. Ur kar Khal kijagah uRtee Khak kar lijiyega.

6. wo heeraaN haiN mirii nazraiN tikii rehteeN haiN kyooN un par?
mujhe hairat hai kyooN un ki yey heerani naheeN jaati.
Bohat Khub. Zindabad.

7. pas-e-aa-eena hai yey kon mujh ko taktaa hairat se?
mirii Soorat bhalaa kia us se pehchani naheeN jaati.
......Hairat se mujhe yeh kaun takta hai...yuun kar lijiye.
8. juloo meiN lay ke aayaa hooN meiN gard o baaraaN rastay kay
karooN kia ub bhi ye aadat sulemaani naheeN jaati
Shayad sher kuch Safaai chahhta hai. Aap ka maqsad wazeh nahin ho saka.
9. hai kaRwi baat ye :khawar: magar such hai so kehni hai
agar mai pee le ko-ii toa musalmaani naheeN jaati.
Shairee ke e'tbaar se aap ka khyaal durust lagta hai magar deenee e'tbaar se Ghalat. YahaN yeh bhi Arz kar dooN "musalmaanee" lafz Urdu meN ek KhaS maana meN istaimal hota hai (ha ha ha ha ).

Apka MuKhlis
Jawaid



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aap ki rehnamai ka taalib,
muhammad k. Siddiqui

Posted: Thu May 03, 2007 6:05 am
by muhammad_19k
MOHTARAM JANAB JAWAID SAHEB,

aap ki daad o tajaweez ke leeaye beHad shukrguzaar hooN. aor mamnoon hooN ke aap ne apne qeemti waqt meiN se kuch waqt nikaal kar mairi ghazal par tabSiraa karnaa ganwaaraa kiyaa.

aakhiri sha'er par mazhabi tanqeed ke leeaye meiN likhte waqt hi meiN zahni Tor par tayyar thaa. issi leeaye pehlay miSra meiN issay kaRwa such likhaa hai. aap hi bataa-i-aye kia shareeat meiN koi aisaa Hukm hai ke agar koi "mai" pee lay to woh Islam se Khaarij ho jaa-aye ga? haaN uss ka ye fae'l eeman ke kamzor darjay ko zaahir kartaa hai. woh momin naheeN rahay ga. naikoo kaar naheeN rahay ga laikin ussay ISLAM se khaarij qaraar daine ka fatwaa to rigid se rigid molvi bhi naheeN lagaa saktaa.

aik baar phir aap ki tamaam tajaweez o daad ke leeaye shukriyaa.

dua'aa goa,
MUHAMMAD K. SIDDIQUI.

Posted: Thu May 03, 2007 9:17 am
by jawaid badauni
muhammad_19k wrote:MOHTARAMA JANAB JAWAID SAHEB,

aap ki daad o tajaweez ke leeaye beHad shukrguzaar hooN. aor mamnoon hooN ke aap ne apne qeemti waqt meiN se kuch waqt nikaal kar mairi ghazal par tabSiraa karnaa ganwaaraa kiyaa.

aakhiri sha'er par mazhabi tanqeed ke leeaye meiN likhte waqt hi meiN zahni Tor par tayyar thaa. issi leeaye pehlay miSra meiN issay kaRwa such likhaa hai. aap hi bataa-i-aye kia shareeat meiN koi aisaa Hukm hai ke agar koi "mai" pee lay to woh Islam se Khaarij ho jaa-aye ga? haaN uss ka ye fae'l eeman ke kamzor darjay ko zaahir kartaa hai. woh momin naheeN rahay ga. naikoo kaar naheeN rahay ga laikin ussay ISLAM se khaarij qaraar daine ka fatwaa to rigid se rigid molvi bhi naheeN lagaa saktaa.

aik baar phir aap ki tamaam tajaweez o daad ke leeaye shukriyaa.

dua'aa goa,
MUHAMMAD K. SIDDIQUI.[/

Aisa Ghazab na kije. Mohtaram nah bhee kahN tub bhi durust magar yeh moHtarma walee baat to samajh meN nahiN aati (ha ha ha ha ).

Sharab peena sharaii e'tbaar se Ghalat hai magar yaqeenan eh aamaal ki Ghalatee hai aur pene wala gunaah ka murtakib hai magar Kharij-ul-deen nahiN. Ammal aur aqeeedeh ki Ghalatee meN farq hai. Agar koii sharab nah piye magar aisa kahe keh sharab peena jaaiz hai tou woh Islam se bahar ho jayega kyuuNkeh unse aamaalki nahin aqeedeh ki ghalatee ki hai aur aHkaam.e deen ki tauheen ki hai jiskee hamare deen meN moaafee nahiN.

Yeh ek bohat Taweel baHC hai jo is waqt hamara maqSad nahiN. Aap ne likha tou majbooran mujhe bhi likhna paRa. Aap ne mujh se sirf adabee nuktaa.e nazar se tabasara Talab kiya tha so main ne bhej diya. Ab yeh aap ko aazaadi hai aur hona bhi chaahiye keh kin baatoN se muttafiq hoN kin se nah hoN.

Mere Khyaal se yeh dilchusp muzakirah ab yaheeN Khatm hona chahiye. Mushaairah 28 per aapki Ghazal ka muntazir hooN aur haaN main ne apni TooTee-phooTee ghazal bhej dee hai dekh lijiyega.

MuKhliS
Jawaid

Posted: Thu May 03, 2007 9:43 am
by muhammad_19k
Janab MOHTARAM JAWAID SAHEB,

mien typographical error ke maazirat chahtaa hooN. meiN ne taSHeeH kar di hai. aap ne likhaa.

1. Sharab peena sharaii e'tbaar se Ghalat hai magar yaqeenan eh aamaal ki Ghalatee hai aur pene wala gunaah ka murtakib hai magar Kharij-ul-deen nahiN.

2. Ammal aur aqeeedeh ki Ghalatee meN farq hai.

3. Agar koii sharab nah piye magar aisa kahe keh sharab peena jaaiz hai tou woh Islam se bahar ho jayega kyuuNkeh unse aamaalki nahin aqeedeh ki ghalatee ki hai aur aHkaam.e deen ki tauheen ki hai jiskee hamare deen meN moaafee nahiN.

4. Yeh ek bohat Taweel baHC hai jo is waqt hamara maqSad nahiN. Aap ne likha tou majbooran mujhe bhi likhna paRa. Aap ne mujh se sirf adabee nuktaa.e nazar se tabasara Talab kiya tha so main ne bhej diya. Ab yeh aap ko aazaadi hai aur hona bhi chaahiye keh kin baatoN se muttafiq hoN kin se nah hoN. Mere Khyaal se yeh dilchusp muzakirah ab yaheeN Khatm hona chahiye. Mushaairah 28 per aapki Ghazal ka muntazir hooN aur haaN main ne apni TooTee-phooTee ghazal bhej dee hai dekh lijiyega.
mujhe aap ki har har baat se ittefaaq hai. Allah ta'aalaa aap par apni rehmatoaN aor naimatoaN ki baarish karay.

du'aa go,
MUHAMMAD K. SIDDIQUI
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