Ghalib ki zameen meN meree nacheez tarahee ghazal...

Post by **jawaid badauni** » Sat Aug 04, 2007 7:23 pm

Dosto!
Salam.e masnoon

Ek aur taza tarahee ghazal kah lee hai jo aap ki nazr kar raha hooN. ummidhai pasaNd farmayeNge.

Aapka MuKhliS
Jawaid

junooN meN Hadd.e aaKhir ka pata kya
sha’oor.e ibteda kya inteha kya

rah.e manzil se Khud naa aashana ho
tumhaaree raihbaree kya naqsh.e paa kya

Gham.e ulfat se bachke chalne waalo!
tumheN malum hai Gham ka maza kya ?

babaatin teer.o.naize se siva hai
bazaahir ek bekus ki Sada kya

phir uske bAAd chaahen jo saza deeN
bataa tou deN hamaree hai Khata kya

wohee to lutf hai jo aarzee ho
“nah ho marna tou jeene ka maza kya”

karam jitna bhee ho aaKhir karam hai
mohabbat meN ziyadah kya zara kya

woh naadim hai tou ai “Jawaid” SaaHab
ab uske zulm ka shikwa gila kya

Post by **tahira Masood** » Sat Aug 04, 2007 9:16 pm

MoHteram Jawaid saheb

Asslamo Alaikum w.w

matlaakhoob hai aur...

phir us k ba'd chaaheiN jo sazaa deiN
bataa tau daiN hamari hai khataa kayaa

waaaaah bohat khoob

aap ki ghazal bohat khoobSurat hai

meri teraf se daad Haazir-e-khidmat hai

wassalam

Post by **rukhsar** » Sat Aug 04, 2007 11:27 pm

jawed sahib
aadab
mizaj-e giraami
janab , Hazrat-e ghalib ki zameen main aapki ghazal ka muta,ala kia .
bhut khoob ,, ghalib ki zameen ,, main khoob sher nikalay hain wah waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
bhut khoob daad haazir-e khidmat hay ...............

is sher ka misra-e saani zara dobaara dekh lejey shayed is main ,, kaa ,, type honay say rah gayaa hay

Gham.e ulfat se bachke chalne waalo!
tumheN malum hai Gham maza kya ?
........................................................
gustakhi mo,oaaf
rukhsar

Post by **jawaid badauni** » Sun Aug 05, 2007 3:50 am

tahira Masood wrote:MoHteram Jawaid saheb

Asslamo Alaikum w.w

matlaakhoob hai aur...

phir us k ba'd chaaheiN jo sazaa deiN
bataa tau daiN hamari hai khataa kayaa

waaaaah bohat khoob

aap ki ghazal bohat khoobSurat hai

meri teraf se daad Haazir-e-khidmat hai

wassalam

MoHtarma Tahira SaaHibah
aadaab

Daad.o.taHseen ke liyee aap ka mamnoon hooN.

MuKhliS
Jawaid

Post by **jawaid badauni** » Sun Aug 05, 2007 3:52 am

rukhsar wrote:jawed sahib
aadab
mizaj-e giraami
janab , Hazrat-e ghalib ki zameen main aapki ghazal ka muta,ala kia .
bhut khoob ,, ghalib ki zameen ,, main khoob sher nikalay hain wah waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
bhut khoob daad haazir-e khidmat hay ...............

is sher ka misra-e saani zara dobaara dekh lejey shayed is main ,, kaa ,, type honay say rah gayaa hay

Gham.e ulfat se bachke chalne waalo!
tumheN malum hai Gham maza kya ?
........................................................
gustakhi mo,oaaf
rukhsar

MoHtaramee RuKhsar SaaHab,
Tasleemaat

Ghazal ki purKhuloos daad aur pazeeraayee ke liye aap ka behud mamnoon hooN. Aap ne durust farmaya ek lafz type honey se rah gaya tha jo ab maiN ne durust kar diya hai. Ej baar phir aap ka shukriya.

MuKhliS
Jawaid

Post by **muhammad_19k** » Mon Aug 06, 2007 5:17 am

Jawaid bhai,

bohat khoob! aik aisii shaandaar ghazal kehnay par daad o mubaarakbaad qubool kijiaye.

mukhliS,
Muhammad K. Siddiqui.

Post by **jawaid badauni** » Tue Aug 07, 2007 3:06 am

muhammad_19k wrote: Jawaid bhai,

bohat khoob! aik aisii shaandaar ghazal kehnay par daad o mubaarakbaad qubool kijiaye.

mukhliS,
Muhammad K. Siddiqui.

Bohat bohat shukriya Khawar SaaHab.

Khoosh raheN!

Jawaid

Post by **haamidbaaqri** » Tue Aug 07, 2007 9:06 am

Dosto!
aadaab

Assalaam o alaikum
biradaram jawaid saahib

junooN meN Hadd.e aaKhir ka pata kya
sha’oor.e ibteda kya inteha kya

bahut accha matla hai..waah...

rah.e manzil se Khud naa aashana ho
tumhaaree raihbaree kya naqsh.e paa kya

bilkul sach......

Gham.e ulfat se bachke chalne waalo!
tumheN malum hai Gham ka maza kya ?

behtreen sher hai yeh bhai saahib......bahut khoob

babaatin teer.o.naize se siva hai
bazaahir ek bekus ki Sada kya

khoob......

phir uske bAAd chaahen jo saza deeN
bataa tou deN hamaree hai Khata kya

accha hai...

wohee to lutf hai jo aarzee ho
“nah ho marna tou jeene ka maza kya”

acchee girah hai...

karam jitna bhee ho aaKhir karam hai
mohabbat meN ziyadah kya zara kya

bahut accha hai.

woh naadim hai tou ai “Jawaid” SaaHab
ab uske zulm ka shikwa gila kya

bahut accha maqta kaha hai bhai saahib

aapki is dilkash ghazal per hamaari dilee daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayeN :rose

.

allah(sbhnwt)karay zoray qalam aur ziyaadah

aapka apna
haamidbaaqari

Post by **Sarwar A. Raz** » Tue Aug 07, 2007 1:11 pm

mukarramee Jawaid SaaHeb: aadaab!

Ghalib kee zameen meN aap kee kaawish dekhee aur pasand aayee. daad qubool keejiYe.

aise ustaadoN kee zameen meN Ghazal kehne meN mujh ko hameshah hee ta,ammul hotaa hai (HaalaaN.k ek aadh baar maiN ne bhee yeh koshish kee hai) kyoN.k laa-muHaalah qaaree sha,o'oree yaa Ghair-sha,o'oree t^aur par ustaadoN kee Ghazal se hamaaree Ghazal kaa taqaabulah kartaa hai aur nateejah z^aahir!

aap ne Ghazal par meHnat kee hai aur yeh yaqeena" qaabil-e-sitaayish hai. aap ke mat^le' ne mere Zehn meN do sawaal uThaaYe:

(1) mat^la' hai:

junooN meN Hadd.e aaKhir ka pata kya
sha’oor.e ibteda kya inteha kya

(a) :Hadd-e-aaKhir: aur :Intehaa: meN kyaa ma'nawee farq hai jo in kee mukarrar bandish kee gayee hai? mere nazdeek to in meN koyee farq naheeN hai, so jo ma'nee pehle miSre' meN aap ne adaa kiYe wohee doosre ke aaKhiree TukRe se adaa huwe. aur is kee Z^aroorat meree fehm-e-naaqiS meN naheeN hai.

(2) doosre miSre' meN aap ne kahaa hai keh:

sha’oor.e ibteda kya inteha kya

goyaa :ibtidaa: ke :sha,o'or: kaa Zikr hai jab.k :intihaa: mujarrad hee baaNdhaa gayaa hai. z^aahir hai keh :sha,o'or: kaa it^laaq :intihaa: par naheeN ho saktaa hai. bandish kaa taqaaZ^aa thaa keh :intihaa: ke saath bhee koyee saabiqah lagaayaa jaataa jaisaa keh :ibtidaa: kaa saabiqah :sha,o'or: hai. yeh miSre' kee kamzoree huyee jis ko aap ba-aasaanee yooN keh kar door kar sakte the:

sha,o'or-e-ibtidaa-o-intihaa kyaa!

ba-har Soorat yeh z^aahir hai keh pehlaa miSra' naz^ar-e-caanee kaa t^alabgaar hai. ziyaadah Hadd-e-adab!

aur raawee sab chain boltaa hai!

Sarwar A. Raz "Sarwar"

Post by **jawaid badauni** » Wed Aug 08, 2007 7:22 pm

Sarwar Raz wrote:mukarramee Jawaid SaaHeb: aadaab!

Ghalib kee zameen meN aap kee kaawish dekhee aur pasand aayee. daad qubool keejiYe.

aise ustaadoN kee zameen meN Ghazal kehne meN mujh ko hameshah hee ta,ammul hotaa hai (HaalaaN.k ek aadh baar maiN ne bhee yeh koshish kee hai) kyoN.k laa-muHaalah qaaree sha,o'oree yaa Ghair-sha,o'oree t^aur par ustaadoN kee Ghazal se hamaaree Ghazal kaa taqaabulah kartaa hai aur nateejah z^aahir!

aap ne Ghazal par meHnat kee hai aur yeh yaqeena" qaabil-e-sitaayish hai. aap ke mat^le' ne mere Zehn meN do sawaal uThaaYe:

(1) mat^la' hai:

junooN meN Hadd.e aaKhir ka pata kya
sha’oor.e ibteda kya inteha kya

(a) :Hadd-e-aaKhir: aur :Intehaa: meN kyaa ma'nawee farq hai jo in kee mukarrar bandish kee gayee hai? mere nazdeek to in meN koyee farq naheeN hai, so jo ma'nee pehle miSre' meN aap ne adaa kiYe wohee doosre ke aaKhiree TukRe se adaa huwe. aur is kee Z^aroorat meree fehm-e-naaqiS meN naheeN hai.

(2) doosre miSre' meN aap ne kahaa hai keh:

sha’oor.e ibteda kya inteha kya

goyaa :ibtidaa: ke :sha,o'or: kaa Zikr hai jab.k :intihaa: mujarrad hee baaNdhaa gayaa hai. z^aahir hai keh :sha,o'or: kaa it^laaq :intihaa: par naheeN ho saktaa hai. bandish kaa taqaaZ^aa thaa keh :intihaa: ke saath bhee koyee saabiqah lagaayaa jaataa jaisaa keh :ibtidaa: kaa saabiqah :sha,o'or: hai. yeh miSre' kee kamzoree huyee jis ko aap ba-aasaanee yooN keh kar door kar sakte the:

sha,o'or-e-ibtidaa-o-intihaa kyaa!

ba-har Soorat yeh z^aahir hai keh pehlaa miSra' naz^ar-e-caanee kaa t^alabgaar hai. ziyaadah Hadd-e-adab!

aur raawee sab chain boltaa hai!

Sarwar A. Raz "Sarwar"

Janab Sarwar Raz Saahab!
aadaab

Ek deegar chaupal meN aap se tafSeelee guftagoo ho chukee hai. Yahan bhi jawab dena bahar Haal laazim tha. Aap ka behud mamnoon hooN keh meri nacheez ghazal per tawajoo farmaaii aur apne giraaNqadr tabsarey se nawazah.

MuKhliS
Jawaid