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zindagi

Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 11:11 pm
by Kausar
zindagi too rukh-e-zeibaa hai liyey aayi magar
ab na hai dil pe teray husna ke jaadoo kaa asar

teree aankhaun ke yeh rangeen-o-haseen afsaanay
ab na is dil mein talaatum koi laa sakte hein

husn-e-aalam ke taranaun se saje lab terey
dhardkanaun mein na koi raag jaga sakte hein

teray chehray pe yeh muskaan bhi dilkash hei magar
ab na hai dil pe...........


teray cheray pe masarrat ka munavvar hai zahoor
aur aankhaun mein umeedaun ka yaqeen ka hai suroor

ik saraapaa hai sametay huvey ra'naayi-e-hoor
meri nazraun ko magar hai kahan kuchh is ka sha'oor

taray chehray ki yeh raunaq hai bohot khoob magar
ab na hai dil pe.................

assalam,
bas itna hi likha hai, apni rai zaroor bataiye
khudahafiz
Kausar

Re: zindagi

Posted: Fri Apr 08, 2005 1:46 am
by Hashmat Usmani
salaam Kausar saaHiba,

aapko is maHfil meN maiN Khush_aamded kahtaa huuN.

aapkii Ghazal paRhi aur paRh kar bahot achchhaa lagaa. aapkii Gahzal ke mazaameen aur Khayaal achchhe haiN magar mujhe lagta hai aapko abhii thoRii mashq kii aur zaroorat hai aur insha Allah jald hii aapkii lagan aur fahm rang laayegii...yahaN par aapkii rahnumaaii insha Allah ustaad sho'ara zaroor farmaayeNge. aatii jaatii rahiiyegaa. aapko filHaal Ghazal kii haiyat ke baare meN thoRa jaankaarii lenii chaahiye aur saath hii bahoor aur avzaan ko jaanne kii zaroorat pesh aayegii...aapkii dil_shikanii qata'ii maqsood nahiiN...bas merii aaraa ko ek dostaana mashwarah hii samajhiyegaa. agar koii gustaaKhii sar_zad ho gaii ho to is naa_ai'hl ko mu'aaf farmaaiyegaa. shukria.

Hashmat

Re: zindagi

Posted: Fri Apr 08, 2005 11:11 pm
by Kausar
Hashmat Usmani wrote:salaam Kausar saaHiba,

aapko is maHfil meN maiN Khush_aamded kahtaa huuN.

aapkii Ghazal paRhi aur paRh kar bahot achchhaa lagaa. aapkii Gahzal ke mazaameen aur Khayaal achchhe haiN magar mujhe lagta hai aapko abhii thoRii mashq kii aur zaroorat hai aur insha Allah jald hii aapkii lagan aur fahm rang laayegii...yahaN par aapkii rahnumaaii insha Allah ustaad sho'ara zaroor farmaayeNge. aatii jaatii rahiiyegaa. aapko filHaal Ghazal kii haiyat ke baare meN thoRa jaankaarii lenii chaahiye aur saath hii bahoor aur avzaan ko jaanne kii zaroorat pesh aayegii...aapkii dil_shikanii qata'ii maqsood nahiiN...bas merii aaraa ko ek dostaana mashwarah hii samajhiyegaa. agar koii gustaaKhii sar_zad ho gaii ho to is naa_ai'hl ko mu'aaf farmaaiyegaa. shukria.

Hashmat

Walaykum assalaam Hashmat sahab,

maine isi liye yeh ghazal post ki thi ke aap jayse ustadaun se kuchh seekh mil sake. Aap ki bataun ka mujhey qatayi bura naheen laga. meri yahi koshish hai ke apnee shayari ka ma'yaar badhta jaye

aap ki shukar guzar hun ke aap ne apna qeemati waqt meri is ghazal ko diya
shukriya,
khudahafiz,
kausar