Aek taazah Ghazal chouTi beHr meiN. Abdullah Nazir.

Kuhnah mashq ShoAraa kaa kalaam jo beHr meiN hounaa zaroori hei

Moderator: Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar

Post Reply
User avatar
Abdullah Nazir
-
-
Posts: 2681
Joined: Sat Dec 11, 2004 4:16 am
Location: Jeddah
Contact:

Aek taazah Ghazal chouTi beHr meiN. Abdullah Nazir.

Post by Abdullah Nazir »


MuHtaramaat o MuHtarameen
Arbaab-e-meHfil aur aHbab-e-sukhan

Purkhuloos Tasleemaat, :rose


Apni aek taazah seedhi saadah ghazal jou chouTi beHr meiN hei pesh karrahaa hooN. Ummeed ke aap apni giraaNqadr aaraa se navaazkar khaaksar ko shukriyah adaa karne kaa mauqaA denge.

G H A Z A L roman meiN.

1-Jazba-e-fikr o fun dekhiye
Meraa deewaanah pan dekhiye
2-jalva-e-yaar hei chaar soo
shaukat-e-anjuman dekhiye
3-yaa samajh leejiye kam nazar
yaa miraa Husn-e-zan dekhiye
4-sar jhukaakar hei wo surkhroo
dekhiye baankpan dekhiye
5-aasmaaN per hei kaalaa dhuaaN
aur zameeN per ghuTan dekhiye
6-sabr kii Had se maiN baRhgayaa
ab jabeeN per shikan dekhiye
7-lab pah aayaa nah shikwah koii
mera dil jaan-e-man dekhiye
8-hougaie gung meri zubaaN
jabr-e-daar o rasan dekhiye
9-saari dunyaa hei badli houii
hei koiee koh kan dekhiye
10-wo jo bichRe nah lauTe kabhi
jaane kab hou milan dekhiye
11-micl-e-seHraa heiN weeraaniyaaN
kis ke dil kaa chaman dekhiye
12-saans mushkil se chalti hei ab
zindagi kii thakan dekhiye
13-rehzanaoN se bhii hei doo badoo
kaarwaaN kii lagan dekhiye
14-be-waTan mujhko kehiye magar
pehle apnaa waTan dekhiye
15-apni aankhaoN meiN jab dam nahiN
kis ke ranj o meHan dekhiye
16-chaand aaye jo Nazir ke ghar
chaandni kii phaban dekhiye.
=====


Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.

Attachments
a_na_trial_6_f.JPG
a_na_trial_6_f.JPG (129.94 KiB) Viewed 882 times
Image
Ibn-e-siddique
-
-
Posts: 219
Joined: Thu Dec 16, 2004 4:12 am
Location: Doha Qatar
Contact:

Post by Ibn-e-siddique »

Mohtaram Nazir saHib

salaam arz hai

choTi beHr meiN kahee gayee ye ghazal hameN pasand aayee. mashallah sabhi ash'aar bahot umda haiN.

meri jaanib se is umda takhleeq per daad qubool farmaaiN

amjad
Mire ash'aar ae Iqbal kyuN pyaare na hoN mujhko
mire TooTe hue dil ke ye dard.angez naale haiN
fatimah
-
-
Posts: 71
Joined: Sun Jan 02, 2005 6:58 am
Location: doha qatar
Contact:

Post by fatimah »

aslaam_u_alikam

janab abdulaah nazir sahib aap ka yeh kalam bohat pasand aayaa.

10-wo jo bichRe nah lauTe kabhi
jaane kab hou milan dekhiye

dheroN daad qubool kijiye.
shukriya
Image
waqar_masood
-
-
Posts: 134
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 5:52 am
Location: khanewal
Contact:

Post by waqar_masood »

muhturam abdullah nazir sahib

janab yeh khubsoorat ghazal per ker jitna lutf aya , meray pass bayan kernay kay leye alfaaz nahin , haqeeqtaan lutf a gaya , janab , bay had mubarakbaad aisee khubsoorat takhleeq per

niaz mand

waqar masood
hello
User avatar
Mahtab Qadr
-
-
Posts: 559
Joined: Sun Dec 12, 2004 7:36 am
Location: Jeddah Saudi Arabia
Contact:

Post by Mahtab Qadr »

Mohatram Abdullah bhai , salaam e masnoon.
wah wah choti bahr mai aapki khoobsurat ghazal ne tabiat ko khusgawar asar se nawaaza. baaz ashwaar to behad pasand aaye. maslan,
sar jhukaakar hei wo surkhroo
dekhiye baankpan dekhiye

phougaie gung meri zubaaN
jabr-e-daar o rasan dekhiye

micl-e-seHraa heiN weeraaniyaaN
kis ke dil kaa chaman dekhiye

saans mushkil se chalti hei ab
zindagi kii thakan dekhiye

be-waTan mujhko kehiye magar
pehle apnaa waTan dekhiye

shukria
Mahtab Qadr
Sarwar A. Raz
-
-
Posts: 518
Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 3:18 pm
Location: Fort Worth, Texas
Contact:

Post by Sarwar A. Raz »

mukarram-e-bandah! aadaab!

Ghazal kayee din huwe naz^ar se guZree th`ee, likh` aaj rahaa hooN! u'mr ne kaahil kar diyaa hai. lekin yeh baat aap tab jaaneN ge jab meree u'mr ko poNhcheN ge! :-)

Ghazal pasand aayee. daad HaaZ^ir hai. achh`e Khayaalaat aur achh`e bayaan ne mil kar lut^f paidaa kar diyaa hai. she'r #5 kuch` bh`artee kaa ma'loom huwaa lekin yeh meraa sehw-e-naz^ar ho saktaa hai.

Sarwar A. Raz "Sarwar"
yooN aur bohat a'ib haiN :Sarwar: meN wa-lekin
kambaKht muHabbat meN to yaktaa nazar aayaa

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:
User avatar
Abdullah Nazir
-
-
Posts: 2681
Joined: Sat Dec 11, 2004 4:16 am
Location: Jeddah
Contact:

shukriyah

Post by Abdullah Nazir »


MuHtarami
Sarwar A. Raz Sarwar Saahib,

Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,

Apni maAmooli sii ghazal kii pazeeraayi ke liye aapka beHad shukrguzaar hooN.

PaanchwaaN sheaAr mujhe bhii bharti kaa lagaa lekin wo dunyaa ke jangii waaqiAaat se mut'accir houne kii vajah se shaamil hougayaa. Kyaa kareN Sarwar Saahib dunyaa kisi Haalat meiN chain se rehne nahiN detii.


Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.

Image
User avatar
Anmol
-
-
Posts: 139
Joined: Sat Dec 11, 2004 9:32 pm
Location: California
Contact:

Re: Aek taazah Ghazal chouTi beHr meiN. Abdullah Nazir.

Post by Anmol »

WEBMASTER wrote:
6-sabr kii Had se maiN baRhgayaa
ab jabeeN per shikan dekhiye

12-saans mushkil se chalti hei ab
zindagi kii thakan dekhiye
Mohtaram Nazir Sahib, adaab!

ChoTi beHr meiN aap ki yeh Khoobsoorat ghazal paRhi, behad pasand aayi, khusoosi taur per quoted ashaar.. :-)

Maqte meiN "phaban" lafz ka matlab bata dijiye. :-)
User avatar
Abdullah Nazir
-
-
Posts: 2681
Joined: Sat Dec 11, 2004 4:16 am
Location: Jeddah
Contact:

Shukriya

Post by Abdullah Nazir »


Azeezah
A N M O L

Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,

Aapki zarrah navaazi hei ke aap ne meri is chouTi beHar meiN kahii houi ghazal kiii pazeeraayi kii.

Mujhe khushi hei ke aapke intikhaab meiN meri ghazal ke 2 sheAr shaamil houe.

Meraa maqTaA hei:

16-chaand aaye jo Nazir ke ghar
chaandni kii phaban dekhiye.


Doosre miSreA meiN lafz "phaban" ke mani heiN "khoobsoorati" yaa "dilkashi".

Agar yeh lafz aapko theek nahiN lag rahaa hei tou bataayiye, maiN badal doongaa. is maqTeA se maiN ne jou muraad lii wo hei (MeHboob agar Nazir ke ghar aaye, tab uske noor kii dilkashi dekhiye.)). Shukriya.


Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.

Image
Raji
-
-
Posts: 211
Joined: Fri Dec 31, 2004 6:58 am
Location: Home Sweet Home
Contact:

Post by Raji »

moHtaram janab-e-Abdullah Nazir SaaHeb:

Aadaab-o-tasleemat,

bohat dinooN ba'ad iss bazm ke liye kuch waqt nikaal sakee hooN. aap kee ghazal nazar se guzree Hasb-e-mamool achii lagee.
tamaam hee ashaar ache heN. meree janib se dhairooN daad aur mubarakbaad qubool keejiye.

Wassalam

Zahida Raees :Raji:
Meree sha'iree se mujhe jaan Lo
ke yeh aa'enaa hai meri zaat ka
(Raji)
User avatar
Anmol
-
-
Posts: 139
Joined: Sat Dec 11, 2004 9:32 pm
Location: California
Contact:

Re: Shukriya

Post by Anmol »

WEBMASTER wrote:
Azeezah
A N M O L

Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,

Aapki zarrah navaazi hei ke aap ne meri is chouTi beHar meiN kahii houi ghazal kiii pazeeraayi kii.

Mujhe khushi hei ke aapke intikhaab meiN meri ghazal ke 2 sheAr shaamil houe.

Meraa maqTaA hei:

16-chaand aaye jo Nazir ke ghar
chaandni kii phaban dekhiye.


Doosre miSreA meiN lafz "phaban" ke mani heiN "khoobsoorati" yaa "dilkashi".

Agar yeh lafz aapko theek nahiN lag rahaa hei tou bataayiye, maiN badal doongaa. is maqTeA se maiN ne jou muraad lii wo hei (MeHboob agar Nazir ke ghar aaye, tab uske noor kii dilkashi dekhiye.)). Shukriya.


Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.

Adaab, Nazir Sahib!

:-) Bohot shukria, sher ka matlab samajh aa gaya hay, is sher per bhi DheroN daad qubool kijiye.

:-)
User avatar
Abdullah Nazir
-
-
Posts: 2681
Joined: Sat Dec 11, 2004 4:16 am
Location: Jeddah
Contact:

Bahut bahut shukriya

Post by Abdullah Nazir »


MuHtaramah
Saara Saahibah,
- -- -

B. Tasleemaat,

Aapka beHad shukrguzaar hooN ke aap ne meri ghazal kii pazeeraayi farmaayi aur likhkhaa:

(((aapki ye ghazal bohat mukhtalif hai
aapke aur kalaam se.

sabhi ashaar solah aane bohat pasand aaye,

bohat saari daad pesh hai.

mukhlis

sara )))

Apni justajoo-e-sukhan kaa silah aur kyaa chaahtaa hei koii shayer. ThouRi sii daad aur khudsitaayi. Aap ne apni rasm poori kardi aur mujhe behad khushi houii. Shukriyah.


Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.

Image
Post Reply