Yaaraan-e-meHfil, aadaab !
moHtaram Abd-ul-laah Nazir k deye gaye KhoobSoorat t^araHee misra' par sab ki GhazleN paRh aaKhir kaar mujh se rahaa nahiN gayaa ! aur aek naa kaam koshish maiN ne bhi kar hi Daali, so woh Haaazir-e-Khidmat hai !
1.
zamaane ! dekhtaa jaa be-basii se
Zia mil kar rahegaa zindagee se !
2.
kabhee poochho miree aawaargee se
Sabaa kehtee hai kyaa kyaa har kalee se !
3.
yehi seekhaa hai maiN ne a'aashiqee se
"Khat^aa hotee hai SaaHib aadmee se" !
4.
tiree aaNkhoN maiN aisa kyaa hai saaqi ?
taRap uThtaa hoN shauq-e-tishnagee se !
5.
zamaana is leye naalaaN hai shaayad
wafaa ki hai Zia ne har kisee se !
....................................................
shukriya
moKhliS :
Zia Baloch
:: zamaane ! dekhtaa jaa be-basee se ! ::
Moderator: Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar
:: zamaane ! dekhtaa jaa be-basee se ! ::
Dikhaadi shaan, phir ahl-e-chaman ko, Be-niyaazi ki
Khamoshi se jhatak kar, aaj phir, dast-e-sabaa maiN ne
Zia Baloch
Khamoshi se jhatak kar, aaj phir, dast-e-sabaa maiN ne
Zia Baloch
wah wah wah ye sher haasil-e-ghazal Thehra..bahut umda....tumhara ye sher behad pasand aaya......bahut dher saari daad haazir hai....jaldi se qubool kar lo... ;) rose: rose:tiree aaNkhoN maiN aisa kyaa hai saaqi ?
taRap uThtaa hoN shauq-e-tishnagee se !
Shu..
Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai
Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
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jawaid badauni
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- Posts: 810
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 5:38 am
- Contact:
Re: :: zamaane ! dekhtaa jaa be-basee se ! ::
Saara SaaHiba , aadaab arz haisara_j wrote:
zia sahib,
salam.
baRe din baad moshaire mein apki ghazal dekh ker
khushi hui.
jis tarah apne likha hai ke "nakaam koshish" tou is nakaam koshish
per kamyaabi ki daad qubool keejiye. ashaar hamesha ki tarah apne khoob likhe hain.
mukhlis
sara
janaab ye aap ki zarra-nawaazi hai ! warna maiN to "man aanam k man daanam" nehaayat mamnoon hoN aap ka ! shukriya
moKhliS :
Zia Baloch
Dikhaadi shaan, phir ahl-e-chaman ko, Be-niyaazi ki
Khamoshi se jhatak kar, aaj phir, dast-e-sabaa maiN ne
Zia Baloch
Khamoshi se jhatak kar, aaj phir, dast-e-sabaa maiN ne
Zia Baloch
Re: :: zamaane ! dekhtaa jaa be-basee se ! ::
Ji janab..... aap ek Ghazal maiN 15, 20 ashaar likhnay walay shaair haiN....aap ke liye tou 5 ashaar ki Ghazal "naakaam koshish" jesi hi hogi...... lekin hamaray Khayaal say touYaaraan-e-meHfil, aadaab !
moHtaram Abd-ul-laah Nazir k deye gaye KhoobSoorat t^araHee misra' par sab ki GhazleN paRh aaKhir kaar mujh se rahaa nahiN gayaa ! aur aek naa kaam koshish maiN ne bhi kar hi Daali, so woh Haaazir-e-Khidmat hai !
5 ashaar ki Ghazal likhna bhi
laana hai joo-e-sheer ka
pehla misra bohut zordaar hai....lekin doosra misra us ka saath nahiN day paaraha....aisa mujhay mehsoos hua.....zaroori nahiN ke aisa ho bhi....hum kahan ke dana haiN...kis huner maiN yukta haiN....:)...jo laga likha gai ...zamaane ! dekhtaa jaa be-basii se
Zia mil kar rahegaa zindagee se !
wah....husn-e-matlaa Khoob hai..... daad haazir haikabhee poochho miree aawaargee se
Sabaa kehtee hai kyaa kyaa har kalee se !
durust seekha..... werna aisay kaamoN say koi taameeri sabaq lena mushkil hi hota hai.....yehi seekhaa hai maiN ne a'aashiqee se
"Khat^aa hotee hai SaaHib aadmee se" !
..... girah Khoob lagaai aap nay...
wahhh......ye jaan-e-Ghazal shair hai..... bohut hi umda....kia Khoob Khayaal hai...aur kis bay ssaKhtagi say adaa kia hai aap nay....mashALlah..tiree aaNkhoN maiN aisa kyaa hai saaqi ?
taRap uThtaa hoN shauq-e-tishnagee se !
zamaana naalaN kiuN na ho....aap ki Khata hi bohut baRi hai hazrat!...:)zamaana is leye naalaaN hai shaayad
wafaa ki hai Zia ne har kisee se !
wafa jesi Khata, maana, baRi hai
Khataa hoti hai saahib aadmi say!!.....:)
albatta mera tou aap ko yehi mashwara hai.....(jis per Khud kabhi amal nahiN kia)
kisi ke zarf say baRh kar na kar mehr-o-wafa hargiz
ke ye bay jaa sharaafat bhi baRa nuqsaan deti hai!!!
aap ki Ghazal paRhnay ke baad ye samajh nahiN aaya ke aap nay isay naa kaam koshish ka naam kiuN diya.... saaqi walay shair ki Khusoosi daad ke sath......poori ghazal per dili daad haazir hai....:)
Nigaah
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Abdullah Nazir
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- Posts: 2681
- Joined: Sat Dec 11, 2004 4:16 am
- Location: Jeddah
- Contact:
Waah waah bahut khoob
MuHtarami o Azeezi
Zia Baloch Saahib,
Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,
YooN meHsoos houtaa hei ke aap ne apni beHad masroofiayt ke bavajood is TaraHi ghazal ko mukammal kiyaa hei. AshAaar kii taAdaad bhii ziyhaadah nahiN hei. Lekin khushi is baat kii hei keh aapke saare ke saare ashAar bahut dilkash heiN.
Is kaamyaab koushish per meri daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye aur apne, shaayeri ke safar, ko jaari rakhiye.
Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.
Shummu wrote:wah wah wah ye sher haasil-e-ghazal Thehra..bahut umda....tumhara ye sher behad pasand aaya......bahut dher saari daad haazir hai....jaldi se qubool kar lo... ;) rose: rose:tiree aaNkhoN maiN aisa kyaa hai saaqi ?
taRap uThtaa hoN shauq-e-tishnagee se !
Shu..
Huzoor ! shumaaila jee , aap ki daad aur ham qabool na kareN ,aisa bhalaa hosaktaa hai kabhi ?
hameN apnee jaan a'zeez hai 
saaqi waale shea'r ko is qadar pasand farmaane par DherOn shukriya qabool kejeye !
shukriya
moKhliS : Zia Baloch
Dikhaadi shaan, phir ahl-e-chaman ko, Be-niyaazi ki
Khamoshi se jhatak kar, aaj phir, dast-e-sabaa maiN ne
Zia Baloch
Khamoshi se jhatak kar, aaj phir, dast-e-sabaa maiN ne
Zia Baloch
jawaid badauni wrote:Azeezi Zia Sahab,
Aapki har Ghazal guzishta ghazal se behtar hoti hai. Yeh taraqqi ki alaamat hai. Ummid hai jald hi aap behud moorassah kalam kahne lageNge, Insha Allah.
Aapki yeh ghazal mukhtacar magar bahut achchee hai. Daad qubool kijiyega.
Mukhlis
Jawaid
moHtarami Jawaid Badauni SaaHib , aadaab
janaab ye aap ki zarra-nawaazi hai ! aap asaatiza ki rahnumaaye meltee rahee aur aap ki daad bhi aise HoSila afzaa ho to yaqeena behtaree to aayegee hi ! nehaayat mamnoon hoN k aap ko meree adnaa see kaavish pasand aayee ! shukriya !
moKhliS :
Zia Baloch
Dikhaadi shaan, phir ahl-e-chaman ko, Be-niyaazi ki
Khamoshi se jhatak kar, aaj phir, dast-e-sabaa maiN ne
Zia Baloch
Khamoshi se jhatak kar, aaj phir, dast-e-sabaa maiN ne
Zia Baloch