aaj aek muddat baa'd connect hosakaa hoN , socha Khaali haath na aayaa jaaye so aek nazm ki saath Haazir hoN , yaad rahe k ye nazm pehle bhi paish kee thee magar tab is k faqat 3 ash'aar the ! aur ab 16 :D
ummed hai k ye neesh bhi gawaaraa kareNge ! qat^a'-e-naz^ar is baat k k maiN bohut jald reply nahiN desakoNga kyoNke Net ab bhi Theek Theek nahiN ! shukriya
:: Urdu Version ::
:: Roman Version ::
Mere Mahboob !
Mere maHboob tujhe kaise bataaoN aaKhir
tujh ko kis raNg maiN paataa hai tiraa ye shaai'r
aise jaise kisi zindaaN maiN chale taaza hawaa
jaise pardes ki hojaaye wat^an jaisi faZ^aa
jaise gumnaam jazeeroN se mile raahnumaa
jaise africa k saHra maiN koii kaali ghaTaa
jaise boolaan ki choTi pe ruke baad-e-Sabaa
jaise sheeraaz ki waadi maiN bahaaroN ki Sadaa
jaise dosheeza-e-kaaGhaan ki ma'Soom adaa
jaise baGhdaad ki dulhan kare tashreeH-e-wafaa !
jaise makraan k saaHil pe koi deep jale
jaise mehraan k daryaa se ghaTaa aa k mile
jaise gangaa maiN but-e-hind ka ruKhsaar dhule
jaise raavi k tabassum se koii phool khile
jaise dajla k kinaare koi tahzeeb pale
jaise aaGhoosh-e-wolar maiN naya ik raaz khule
jaise danube k saaNche maiN koii shea'r Dhale
jaise neckar k kinaare koi mahtaab chale
jaise iqraar-e-moHabbat maiN banaa taaj maHal
jaise iqbaal k naGhmoN maiN nikharne ka a'mal
jaise fit^rat paRhe kashmeer maiN Ghaalib ki Ghazal
jaise minto ka fasaana kayee zihnoN ka badal
jaise sheele(shelley) k taraanoN maiN bahaaroN ki mehak
jaise Haafiz ne Ghazal ko di sharaaroN ki lapak !
mere maHboob ! Haqeeqat to yehi hai k tiraa
Husn bhi meri moHabbat ki t^araH kaamil hai
mere maHboob , mire dard-e-jigar , naaz na kar !
aa k waabasta hai tujh se miri taabinda saHar ! :)
wah wah wah STARMIND aap ne to kamaal kar diya..kya nazm likhi hai...aisa laga jaise kise bahut hi pukhta shaayar ko paRh rahi hoon....aap ne shaayri ke maidaan mein bahut hi kam arse mein bahut zyaada taraqqi kar li hai mashaAllah..dheron daad haazir hai..aap aise hi lagan-o-mehnat se shayri karte rahenge to woh din door nahi jab aap ka naam bhi naamwar shoara meiN gina jaayega
Shumaila
Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai
Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
Aapki nazm paRhkar uskaa iHaaTah karnaa mushkil hougayaa kiyunkeh is meiN bahut saari tashbeehaat heiN.
Meri dili daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye.
Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.
moHtarami A.Nazir SaaHib, w/salaam
kaise haiN aap ?
aap ki tashreef aavari mere leye i'zaaz hai ! aap kaa tah-e-dil se mamnoon hoN ! aap ne jis KhlooS se HoSla afzaayee kee hai aap ka bohut mamnoon hoN ! shukriya
moKhliS :
Zia Baloch
Dikhaadi shaan, phir ahl-e-chaman ko, Be-niyaazi ki
Khamoshi se jhatak kar, aaj phir, dast-e-sabaa maiN ne
Shummu wrote:wah wah wah STARMIND aap ne to kamaal kar diya..kya nazm likhi hai...aisa laga jaise kise bahut hi pukhta shaayar ko paRh rahi hoon....aap ne shaayri ke maidaan mein bahut hi kam arse mein bahut zyaada taraqqi kar li hai mashaAllah..dheron daad haazir hai..aap aise hi lagan-o-mehnat se shayri karte rahenge to woh din door nahi jab aap ka naam bhi naamwar shoara meiN gina jaayega
Shumaila
moHtarama shumaaila SaaHiba , aadaab
kaisee haiN aap ?
sab aap ki zarra-nawaazi hai ! warna na mujh maiN iasee baat hai na hi Ghazal maiN ! aap ne itne KhoobSoorat alfaaz maiN yaad kiyaa k sharmidna hona paRa nehaayat mamnoon hoN ! shukriya
moKhliS ;
Zia Baloch
Dikhaadi shaan, phir ahl-e-chaman ko, Be-niyaazi ki
Khamoshi se jhatak kar, aaj phir, dast-e-sabaa maiN ne
StarMind wrote:
aaj aek muddat baa'd connect hosakaa hoN , socha Khaali haath na aayaa jaaye so aek nazm k saath Haazir hoN , yaad rahe k ye nazm pehle bhi paish kee thee magar tab is k faqat 3 ash'aar the ! aur ab 14 :D
ummed hai k ye neesh bhi gawaaraa kareNge ! qat^a'-e-naz^ar is baat k k maiN bohut jald reply nahiN desakoNga kyoNke Net ab bhi Theek Theek nahiN ! shukriya
janaab-e-zia saHib
aap ke net connection se hameN gilaa to hai, lekin aap ne itni umda nazm sunaa ker saare gile door kar diye
mashallah janaab!, nazm bahot umda hai, zabaan-o-bayaan, tashbeehaat-o-istia'raat ka iste'maal, alfaaz ka intikhaab, bahot khoob.
aap ne itne ilaaqoN ka naam likha hai, hameN to aaj pata chalaa ke aap ka jughraafia (geography) bhi bahot acha hai
Mere maHboob tujhe kaise bataaoN aaKhir
tujh ko kis raNg maiN paataa hai tiraa ye shaai'r
aise jaise kisi zindaaN maiN chale taaza hawaa
jaise pardes ki hojaaye wat^an jaisi faZ^aa
jaise gumnaam jazeeroN se mile raahnumaa
jaise africa k saHra maiN koii kaali ghaTaa
jaise boolaan ki choTi pe ruke baad-e-Sabaa
jaise sheeraaz ki waadi maiN bahaaroN ki Sadaa
jaise dosheeza-e-kaaGhaan ki ma'Soom adaa
jaise baGhdaad ki dulhan kare tashreeH-e-wafaa !
bahot khoob , umda likha hai :)
jaise iqraar-e-moHabbat maiN banaa taaj maHal
jaise iqbaal k naGhmoN maiN nikharne ka a'mal
jaise fit^rat paRhe kashmeer maiN Ghaalib ki Ghazal
jaise minto ka fasaana kayee zihnoN ka badal
ye chaar misre bhi pasand aaye, kashmir meiN to deevaan-e-ghalib ki khaasi maang hogi :D ;)
mere maHboob ! Haqeeqat to yehi hai k tiraa
Husn bhi meri moHabbat ki t^araH kaamil hai
hmmmm, poori nazm meiN hameN aitiraaz hai to is she'r se, magar ye sirf hamaara zaati aitiraaz hai, is liye ise agar dar.khur-e-ai'tinaa na bhi samjhen to koi baat nahiN :)
baat ye hai ke doosre misre meiN aap ne apni mohabbat ko kaamil keh dia.
mohabbat (majaazi ya haqeeqi) kisi soorat kaamil nahiN ho sakti.
Iqbal ne isi liye kahaa tha ke :
tire ishq ki intehaa chaahata hooN
miree saadigee dekh kia chaahata hooN
kuch sho'araa ne intehaai ishq tak paunchne ka tazkira kia hai, magar unhoN ne bhi sirf inteha tak paunchne ki baat ki hai, magar uski takmeel nahiN ki.
aur insaani Husn ka falsafa ye hai ke us ko zavaal hai, aur jise zavaal ho, uski takmeel kaise hogi
mere maHboob , mire dard-e-jigar , naaz na kar !
aa k waabasta hai tujh se miri taabinda saHar ! :)
ye she'r bhi acha hai, poori nazm hi bahot khoob hai, jis she'r per maine aitiraaz kia , voh bhi meHz meri zaati raaye hai, jo yaqeenan ghalat bhi ho sakti hai.
magar is nazm ko , is khoobsurat aHsaas ko daad na dena sareeHan zyaadati hogi, aur maiN is zyaadati ka murtakib nahiN ho saktaa.
bharpoor daad qubool farmaaiN :)
amjad
Mire ash'aar ae Iqbal kyuN pyaare na hoN mujhko
mire TooTe hue dil ke ye dard.angez naale haiN
shukriya
nehaayat mamnoon hoN ! shukriya
