Meri tarahee Gazal (Guzarish # 24)

Tarhi Moshaairah -ShoAaraa aur Shayeraat kii TabAaazmayi ke liye

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jawaid badauni
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Meri tarahee Gazal (Guzarish # 24)

Post by jawaid badauni »

Dosto! Salam qubool kijiye

Ek bohat mAmuli Gazal pesh.e Khidmat hai. Aajkal zahn kuch qaabu meN nahiN. MaSroofiyaat bhi kuch ziyadah haiN.

Buzurg shayar moHtaram Sarwar Raz SaHab se mera iltemaas hai keh sher # 3 se sher # 6 tak daguzar farmayeN.

Khair andesh
Jawaid Badauni
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Chalo ho jaayeN phir se hum divaane
"Tou shayad lauT aayeN din puraane"


Gam-e janaN mataay-e fikr-e dauraaN
kahaN milte haiN haiN subko yeh Khazaane


MoHabbat ka kafan kahta hai mere
Siyasat ne bune haiN taane baane


Chaman ujRa bataata hai yahaN per
Kabhi aabaad thEy kuch aashyane


Jo suljhaadeN Gam-e dauraaN ke gesoo
KahaN se dhooNdh kar laayeN woh shaane


DikheNgee kumsinoN ke ruKh peh KhooshiyaaN
Madaaree aa gaya bunder nachaane


Kahoo unse mujhe kumtar nah samjheN
Keh mujhko bhee banaaya hai Khuda ne


MiyaN :Jawaid: yeh teer-e nazar haiN
KhaTaa karte nahiN apne nishaane


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Abdullah Nazir
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Aapki TaraHi ghazal bahut pasand aayi.

Post by Abdullah Nazir »


MuHtarami o Azeezi
Jawaid Badauni SaaHib,

PurkhulooS Tasleemaat, :-)

Guzarish 24 ke miSreA per aapki TaraHi ghazal bahut pasand aayi jiske liye meri dili daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye.

MULAAHIZAAT:

Chalo ho jaayeN phir se hum divaane
"Tou shayad lauT aayeN din puraane" ;/u[

KhoobSoorat gireh ke saath maTlah bahut dilkash hei. Waah waah.

Gam-e janaN mataay-e fikr-e dauraaN
kahaN milte haiN subko yeh Khazaane

Achchaa sheAr hei, waah waah.

MoHabbat ka kafan kahta hai mere
Siyasat ne bune haiN taane baane

Ghaliban pahle miSreA "meri muHabbat kaa kagan keh rahe heiN aap. Bahut khoob, waah waah.

Chaman ujRa bataata hai yahaN per
Kabhi aabaad thEy kuch aashyane

Waah waah, kyaa kehne.

Jo suljhaadeN Gam-e dauraaN ke gesoo
KahaN se dhooNdh kar laayeN woh shaane

ShaanaoN kaa gaiso'awaoN ko sanwaarnaa qaabil-e-ghaur baat hei.

DikheNgee kumsinoN ke ruKh peh KhooshiyaaN
Madaaree aa gaya bunder nachaane

Achchaa sheAr hei, waah waah.

Kahoo unse mujhe kumtar nah samjheN
Keh mujhko bhee banaaya hai Khuda ne

Waah waah, bahut khoob.

MiyaN :Jawaid: yeh teer-e nazar haiN
KhaTaa karte nahiN apne nishaane

Waah Waah, kyaa kehne. Achchaa maqTaA hei.


Aapka MukhliS,
Nazir.
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Re: Aapki TaraHi ghazal bahut pasand aayi.

Post by jawaid badauni »

WEBMASTER wrote:
MuHtarami o Azeezi
Jawaid Badauni SaaHib,

PurkhulooS Tasleemaat, :-)

Guzarish 24 ke miSreA per aapki TaraHi ghazal bahut pasand aayi jiske liye meri dili daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye.

MULAAHIZAAT:

Chalo ho jaayeN phir se hum divaane
"Tou shayad lauT aayeN din puraane" ;/u[

KhoobSoorat gireh ke saath maTlah bahut dilkash hei. Waah waah.

Gam-e janaN mataay-e fikr-e dauraaN
kahaN milte haiN subko yeh Khazaane

Achchaa sheAr hei, waah waah.

MoHabbat ka kafan kahta hai mere
Siyasat ne bune haiN taane baane

Ghaliban pahle miSreA "meri muHabbat kaa kagan keh rahe heiN aap. Bahut khoob, waah waah.

Chaman ujRa bataata hai yahaN per
Kabhi aabaad thEy kuch aashyane

Waah waah, kyaa kehne.

Jo suljhaadeN Gam-e dauraaN ke gesoo
KahaN se dhooNdh kar laayeN woh shaane

ShaanaoN kaa gaiso'awaoN ko sanwaarnaa qaabil-e-ghaur baat hei.

DikheNgee kumsinoN ke ruKh peh KhooshiyaaN
Madaaree aa gaya bunder nachaane

Achchaa sheAr hei, waah waah.

Kahoo unse mujhe kumtar nah samjheN
Keh mujhko bhee banaaya hai Khuda ne

Waah waah, bahut khoob.

MiyaN :Jawaid: yeh teer-e nazar haiN
KhaTaa karte nahiN apne nishaane

Waah Waah, kyaa kehne. Achchaa maqTaA hei.


Aapka MukhliS,
Nazir.



Mohtarmee Abdullah Nazir SaaHab
Aadaab

Gazal per aapki aara aur graNqadr tabsarey ke liye aap ka behud mamnoon hooN.

PaaNchveN sher ke Hawaley se Arz kar dooN keh shanah Urdu meN KANGHEE ko kahte haiN aur is e'tbaar se mera sher shayad durust hai. Is zimn meN ab aap kya kahte haiN zaroor baaatiyega takeh main sher men zaroori tabdeeli kar sakooN..

MuKhlis
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Post by Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar »

[align=center]moHtaram Janab Jawaid Badauni SaHib aadaab!
Guzarish 24 ke liYe aap ne baRee khubSurat aor dil fareb Ghazal pesh kee hai. agarcheh aap ne jaldee meN kahee hai lekin kamaal Herat hai keh Ghazal kee khubSuratee aor kashish meN rakhnah nah paRne diYa aor mere qareeN Yahee fankaree aor maHarat hai.

mujh~e Ghazal ke sabh~ee she'er pasand aaeY haiN meree dilee dad aor mubarak bad qubool farmaeeN!

mujh~e ummeed hai keh aap hameshah kee t^araH meHfil ko aabaad rakh~ne meN apnee fit^ree she'eree SalaHiYatooN ka bh~arpoor iz^haar farmate huwe bazm meN tashreef late raheeN geY.


Chalo ho jaayeN phir se hum divaane
"Tou shayad lauT aayeN din puraane"

bohot khoob! waah!! achch~ee girah lagaee hai!


Gam-e janaN mataay-e fikr-e dauraaN
kahaN milte haiN haiN subko yeh Khazaane

bohot achch~a maZ^moon hai! waah! waah!


MoHabbat ka kafan kahta hai mere
Siyasat ne bune haiN taane baane

baRa gehra aor zamanah fehmee ka maZ^moon hai! kiYa kehne!


Chaman ujRa bataata hai yahaN per
Kabhi aabaad thEy kuch aashyane

kiYa kehne!!


Jo suljhaadeN Gam-e dauraaN ke gesoo
KahaN se dhooNdh kar laayeN woh shaane

bohot khoob!! aap kee waZ^aHat ne uljh~an Hal kar dee hai!! :-)


DikheNgee kumsinoN ke ruKh peh KhooshiyaaN
Madaaree aa gaya bunder nachaane

bohot khoob!! aap ne apna maqSad baRe u'mdah perae,Y meN ada kiYa hai waah!!


Kahoo unse mujhe kumtar nah samjheN
Keh mujhko bhee banaaya hai Khuda ne

kiYa kehne!! waah!! waah!! Jawaid bh~aee bohot khoob!!


MiyaN :Jawaid: yeh teer-e nazar haiN
KhaTaa karte nahiN apne nishaane

kiYa kehne!! baRa dilkash maZ^moon hai!! wahh!! waah!!

mukarrar dad qubool kijiYe!

ijazut chahoon ga.

Wassalam
Muz^affar[/align]
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Abdullah Nazir
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ghazal kaa paanchwaan sheAr bilkul durust hei

Post by Abdullah Nazir »


MuHtarami o Azeezi
Jawaid Badauni SaaHib,

PurkhulooS Tasleemaat, :lol:

Aapkaa kehnaa bilkul durust hei ke aapkaa paanchwaaN sheAr her liHaaz se SaHeeH hei kiunkeh mushT aur kanghi ki TaraH shaanah bhee urdu meiN mustaAmal hei. Yehi baat mere zehn meiN nah aayi thee jiski vajh se maiN ne likhkhaa thaa ke sheAr qaabil-e-ghaur hei.

Aapki vaZaaHut se meri maAloomaat meiN iZaafah houaa jiske liye aapkaa beHad shukrguzaar hooN.


Aapka MukhliS,
Nazir.
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Re: ghazal kaa paanchwaan sheAr bilkul durust hei

Post by jawaid badauni »

WEBMASTER wrote:
MuHtarami o Azeezi
Jawaid Badauni SaaHib,

PurkhulooS Tasleemaat, :lol:

Aapkaa kehnaa bilkul durust hei ke aapkaa paanchwaaN sheAr her liHaaz se SaHeeH hei kiunkeh mushT aur kanghi ki TaraH shaanah bhee urdu meiN mustaAmal hei. Yehi baat mere zehn meiN nah aayi thee jiski vajh se maiN ne likhkhaa thaa ke sheAr qaabil-e-ghaur hei.

Aapki vaZaaHut se meri maAloomaat meiN iZaafah houaa jiske liye aapkaa beHad shukrguzaar hooN.


Aapka MukhliS,
Nazir.

Janab Abdulla Nazir SaHab
Aadab

Yeh aap ka baRappan hai warna mujh jaisa mubtadee aur tifl.e maktab bhala aap ke ilm meN kya izafah karega. Haqeeqat yeh hai keh yeh lafz kandhey ke mAnaa meN ziyadah Kanghee ke mAAna meN kum hi istaimal hota hai. Mere ek buzurg ne ek jagah istaimal kiya tha mera bhi dil tha kabhi istaimal karooN.

Ummid hai aaindah bhi aap meree rahnumaai farmate raheNge.

MUkhliS
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Post by jawaid badauni »

sara_j wrote:Mohtaram Sarwar sahib ka tabsira doosri mehfil mein aur Nazir sahib ka yehan dekh ker main kashmakash mein par gayi hoon ke kya likhun?

khair mujhe tou hamesha se hi aapka kalaam pasand aya hai aur is baar bhi go ke mujhe maloom hai ke aap kin halaat mein ye jaldbaaz ghazal likhe hain. dil-i-daad qubool keejiye.

:cry:

SaraH SaHibah
Aadab o tasleemaat

Yeh Gazal maiN ne kisee jaldbaazi meN nahiN kahi hai. HaaN yeh zaroor hai keh maiN tarahee GazaloN per ziyadah waqt surf nahiN karta amuman nazr.e Caani ke baghair hi bhej deta hooN. Yeh meri aadat bun chuki hai.

JahaN tak dou buzurgoN ke taqreeban mutazaaad tabsaroN ka sawaal hai main donoN se bohat Khoosh hota hooN. Abdulla Nazir SaHab ki tAreef meN unka Khuloos shamil rahata hai jis se mujhe apne kalam per sanad bhi mil jaati hai aur meri himmat afazaaai bhi hoti hai.

JahaN tak Sarwar SaHab ke tanqeedee tabsarey ka sawal hai maiN oos se bhi kum Khoosh nahiN hota. MaiN ne Khood unse kah rakhkha hai keh baraye karam meri KhamiyaN mujhe bataya kijiye. Iss se bohat kuch seekhne ko bhi milta hai aur kabhi kabhi ek dilchasp KhaliS adabee baHc ka mauqa bhi HaSil hota hai.

Apko mera kalam pasaNd aata hai yeh mere liye bohat Khooshi ki baat hai. Shukriya

MuKhliS
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Post by jawaid badauni »

Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar wrote:[align=center]moHtaram Janab Jawaid Badauni SaHib aadaab!
Guzarish 24 ke liYe aap ne baRee khubSurat aor dil fareb Ghazal pesh kee hai. agarcheh aap ne jaldee meN kahee hai lekin kamaal Herat hai keh Ghazal kee khubSuratee aor kashish meN rakhnah nah paRne diYa aor mere qareeN Yahee fankaree aor maHarat hai.

mujh~e Ghazal ke sabh~ee she'er pasand aaeY haiN meree dilee dad aor mubarak bad qubool farmaeeN!

mujh~e ummeed hai keh aap hameshah kee t^araH meHfil ko aabaad rakh~ne meN apnee fit^ree she'eree SalaHiYatooN ka bh~arpoor iz^haar farmate huwe bazm meN tashreef late raheeN geY.


Chalo ho jaayeN phir se hum divaane
"Tou shayad lauT aayeN din puraane"

bohot khoob! waah!! achch~ee girah lagaee hai!


Gam-e janaN mataay-e fikr-e dauraaN
kahaN milte haiN haiN subko yeh Khazaane

bohot achch~a maZ^moon hai! waah! waah!


MoHabbat ka kafan kahta hai mere
Siyasat ne bune haiN taane baane

baRa gehra aor zamanah fehmee ka maZ^moon hai! kiYa kehne!


Chaman ujRa bataata hai yahaN per
Kabhi aabaad thEy kuch aashyane

kiYa kehne!!


Jo suljhaadeN Gam-e dauraaN ke gesoo
KahaN se dhooNdh kar laayeN woh shaane

bohot khoob!! aap kee waZ^aHat ne uljh~an Hal kar dee hai!! :-)


DikheNgee kumsinoN ke ruKh peh KhooshiyaaN
Madaaree aa gaya bunder nachaane

bohot khoob!! aap ne apna maqSad baRe u'mdah perae,Y meN ada kiYa hai waah!!


Kahoo unse mujhe kumtar nah samjheN
Keh mujhko bhee banaaya hai Khuda ne

kiYa kehne!! waah!! waah!! Jawaid bh~aee bohot khoob!!


MiyaN :Jawaid: yeh teer-e nazar haiN
KhaTaa karte nahiN apne nishaane

kiYa kehne!! baRa dilkash maZ^moon hai!! wahh!! waah!!

mukarrar dad qubool kijiYe!

ijazut chahoon ga.

Wassalam
Muz^affar[/align]

Azeezi Mozaffar SaaHab,
Aadaab

Bohat khooshee hoti hai aapka tafCeeli aur jamey tabsarah paRhker. Gazal ki pazeeraai himmat afzaaii ka sabab banee. Behund amamnoon hooN.

MaiN ne aap ki Gazal bhi paRh lii hai insha Allah jald hi apni nacheez aara likh ker bhejooNga.

Khoosh raheN!

MuKhliS
Jawaid
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Post by hassan_bashir »

mohtaram Jawaid saaHib: Aadab!

janaab hamesha kee tarah aap kee yeh Ghazal bhii usii raftaar se khoob rahi. :grin: tamaam hii ash'aar saadah lafzoN meiN aChhe kahe gaye haiN aur girah bhii khoob lagaaii hai.

lehaaza miree jaanib se dilee daad aur mubaarak-baad qubool keejiYe. :rose :-)


Hassan
Urdu hai jis ka naam hamiiN jaante haiN :Daagh:
saare jahaaN maiN dhum humaari zubaaN ki hai
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Post by jawaid badauni »

hassan_bashir wrote:mohtaram Jawaid saaHib: Aadab!

janaab hamesha kee tarah aap kee yeh Ghazal bhii usii raftaar se khoob rahi. :grin: tamaam hii ash'aar saadah lafzoN meiN aChhe kahe gaye haiN aur girah bhii khoob lagaaii hai.

lehaaza miree jaanib se dilee daad aur mubaarak-baad qubool keejiYe. :rose :-)


Hassan

Azeezi Hasan SaaHab,
Aadaab

Aapki purKhuloos daad ke liye aapka behud mamnoon hooN.

MuKhliS
Jawaid
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Post by muhammad_19k »

Jawed Sb,

yaqeenun aap ki ghazal ke tamam hi shair bohat achhee haiN. iss leeaye har taraf wah wah ki pukaar sunai day rahi hai. mere wah wah toa shaid "Naqar khane meiN tooti ki awaz" se ziada na ho gi.

Mashallah bohat khoobsoorat ghazal hai. Oar ye shair batoar khaas, agar aap ijaazat daiN to apne naam kartaa Hoon. -:)

"Kahoo unse mujhe kumtar nah samjheN
Keh mujhko bhee banaaya hai Khuda ne"


Allah kare zor e kalam oar ziadaa,

aap ka mukhlis,
muhammad Khawar.
Muhammad K. Siddiqui.
+92 321 4435273

938-C-Faisal Town, Lahore.
Pakistan.
+92 42 111516516
muhammad_19k@hotmail.com
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Post by jawaid badauni »

muhammad_19k wrote:Jawed Sb,

yaqeenun aap ki ghazal ke tamam hi shair bohat achhee haiN. iss leeaye har taraf wah wah ki pukaar sunai day rahi hai. mere wah wah toa shaid "Naqar khane meiN tooti ki awaz" se ziada na ho gi.

Mashallah bohat khoobsoorat ghazal hai. Oar ye shair batoar khaas, agar aap ijaazat daiN to apne naam kartaa Hoon. -:)

"Kahoo unse mujhe kumtar nah samjheN
Keh mujhko bhee banaaya hai Khuda ne"


Allah kare zor e kalam oar ziadaa,

aap ka mukhlis,
muhammad Khawar.

Azeezi Muhammad Khawar Sb,
Tasleemaat

Gazal ki pazeraayee ke liye behud mamnoon hooN.

Aapko bhala kaun kumtar samajhne laga, toba toba. Iss qism ke nafsiyaatee eHsasaat se door rahiye aur sher kahte rahiye. Insha Allah aap ko mujh se bhee ziyadah daad milege.

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Post by muhammad_19k »

Sir

aap ki izzat hosla afazai ka shukriya.

wasalam,
Muhammad Khawar.
Muhammad K. Siddiqui.
+92 321 4435273

938-C-Faisal Town, Lahore.
Pakistan.
+92 42 111516516
muhammad_19k@hotmail.com
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Re: Meri tarahee Gazal (Guzarish # 24)

Post by haamidbaaqri »

jawaid badauni wrote:Dosto! Salam qubool kijiye

Ek bohat mAmuli Gazal pesh.e Khidmat hai. Aajkal zahn kuch qaabu meN nahiN. MaSroofiyaat bhi kuch ziyadah haiN.

Buzurg shayar moHtaram Sarwar Raz SaHab se mera iltemaas hai keh sher # 3 se sher # 6 tak daguzar farmayeN.

Khair andesh
Jawaid Badauni
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Chalo ho jaayeN phir se hum divaane
"Tou shayad lauT aayeN din puraane"


Gam-e janaN mataay-e fikr-e dauraaN
kahaN milte haiN haiN subko yeh Khazaane


MoHabbat ka kafan kahta hai mere
Siyasat ne bune haiN taane baane


Chaman ujRa bataata hai yahaN per
Kabhi aabaad thEy kuch aashyane


Jo suljhaadeN Gam-e dauraaN ke gesoo
KahaN se dhooNdh kar laayeN woh shaane


DikheNgee kumsinoN ke ruKh peh KhooshiyaaN
Madaaree aa gaya bunder nachaane


Kahoo unse mujhe kumtar nah samjheN
Keh mujhko bhee banaaya hai Khuda ne


MiyaN :Jawaid: yeh teer-e nazar haiN
KhaTaa karte nahiN apne nishaane


----------------------------------------------------------
biradaram jaiwaid saahib
assalaam o alaikum

kaisay hai.n aap?

ustaadanah kalaam

bahut khoobsoorat ghazal

qayaamat kee rawaangee.

"kaho unsay mujhay kamtar nah samjhe.n
keh mujhko bhi banaaya hai khuda nay"

kya baat hai.

hame.n yeh ghazal bahut pasand aayee.

hamaari dilee daad qubool farmaaye.n aapki is munfarid takhleeq per

allah(sbhnwt)karay zoray qalam aur ziyaadah

aapka apna
haamidbaaqroi
mai.n to karta nahi.n kuch aur ebaadat ke siwa
paas mere nahi.n kuch aur mohabbat ke siwa
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