Aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage

Kuhnah mashq ShoAraa kaa kalaam jo beHr meiN hounaa zaroori hei

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fatimah
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Aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage

Post by fatimah »

aslaam_u_alikam

guz#43 per kuch mian ney bhi likha hey. jo aap sa key samney hazir hey.
umeed ekrti hun keh aap sab apnii aara sey zaroor nawaazein gey.

chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye

choR ker jab mujhe door jaane lage
dermiyaaN faasalon ko bharaaney lagye

un key aaney ki jab bhi hui thi umeed
nit naye khwaab ham phir sajaane lage

kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage


ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar fatima
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage


shukriya
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Abdullah Nazir
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Aapki TaraHi ghazal khoob hei

Post by Abdullah Nazir »


FATIMA Saahibah

Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,

Aapki TaraHi ghazal dekhkar bahut khushi houi. Din badin aapka andaaz-e-bayaan nikhartaa jaarahaa hei.

chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye

MaTlaA her liHaaz se bahut achchaa hei.

choR ker jab mujhe door jaane lage
dermiyaaN faasalon ko bharaaney lagye

Yeh Husn-e-MaTlaA bhii bahut achchaa hei.

un key aaney ki jab bhi hui thi umeed
nit naye khwaab ham phir sajaane lage

Is sheAr ke pahle misreA meiN "jab bhii hui thi umeed" se yooN maloom houtaa hei ke yeh baat sirf maazi kii thii jiska Haal se koiee taAlluq nahiN. Is TaraH se doosre misreA kaa rabT bhii usi TaraH sirf maazi se houjaataa hei. Isko yooN kiyaa jaasaktaa hei agar aapke ziyaadah se ziyaadah alfaaz ko baghair badle ke kahaiN tou:
unke aane kii phir jaag uThi hei umeed
nit naye khwaab phir ham sajaane lage


kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

Waah waah Fatima kyaa kehne, bahut hii piyaari gireh lagaayi hei. Mubarakbad.

khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage

Yeh sheAr bhii bahut achcha hei.


ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar fatima
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage

Waah wah Fatima, maqTaA bhii bahut hii khoob hei.

Meri daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye is dilkash ghazal ke ashAaar per.


Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.[/i]
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Shummu
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Re: Aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage

Post by Shummu »

chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye
--wah khoob!!!
kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "
--wah nice giraah!!!
khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage
--wah wah ...!
ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar' fatima'
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage
--wow maqta sab se zyadaa pasand aaya!

..is mire pe tumhari ghazla bhi paRhke achcha laga...achche sher kahe hain khaaskar quoted ash'aar zyaada pasand ayae..daad haazir hai :-D

Shumaila


shukriya[/color][/i][/b][/quote]

Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai

Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
Sarwar A. Raz
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Post by Sarwar A. Raz »

Fatima SaaHebah: aadaab aur dua'a

yeh t^araHee Ghazal dekh`ee to th`ee lekin maiN Haal hee meN is qaabil huwaa hooN ke :jam kar: yahaaN kaam kar sakooN! aap ke Khayaalaat aur adaa,igee behtaree kee jaanib jaa rahe haiN. is se dilee Khushee huyee. maiN ne neeche Sirf itnaa kiyaa hai keh aap ke Khayaalaat ko qaa,im rakh`te huYe ek aur shakl tajveez kee hai. is se yeh ho gaa keh aap kee soch ke darwaaze kh`uleN ge aur naYe andaaz soojh`eN ge. baat seedh`ee bh`ee kahee jaa saktee hai aur us ko Zaraa saa :teekh`aa: bh`ee kiyaa jaa saktaa hai. aur yeh soch aur mashq se aa jaataa hai. koyee baRee baat naheeN hai. haaN! yeh Z^arooree naheeN hai keh aap mujh` se muttafiq hee hoN!
--------------
chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye

dekh`! taare bhi ab jh`ilmilaane lagey
hum terii yaad sey dil sajaaney lagye!

:jh`ilmilaanaa: behtar hai aur is se aaKhir-e-shab muraad hai. yaadoN se :dil: sajaanaa bh`ee :gh`ar sajaane: se behtar lagaa.
-----------------------------
choR ker jab mujhe door jaane lage
dermiyaaN faasalon ko bharaaney lagye

choR ker woh mujhe door jaane lage
faasale darmiyaaN ke bharaaney lagye

alfaaz^ kee heraa-ph`eree se bunat aur bayaan behtar karne kee koshish kee gayee hai.
---------------
un key aaney ki jab bhi hui thi umeed
nit naye khwaab ham phir sajaane lage

yooN bh`ee keh sakte haiN:

un ke aane kee ham ko huyee th`ee umeed
nit-naYe Khwaab ph`ir woh dikh`aane lage!
-----------------
kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

she'r achh`aa hai. bayaan Zaraa saa teekh`aa kar ke dekh` leN:

meree ulafat kaa kyaa hai Silah bas yehee?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "
------------------------
khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage

Khauf ne aaNdh`iyoN ke sataayaa bohat
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage

lekin :kaun see aaNdh`iyaaN:? yeh sawaal reh gayaa! aur sochiYe.
----------------
ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar fatima
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage

ek shakl yeh hai:

ek lamHe men ujRaa woh gh`ar :Fatima:
jis ko aabaad hote zamaane lage
-------------------------
Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:
yooN aur bohat a'ib haiN :Sarwar: meN wa-lekin
kambaKht muHabbat meN to yaktaa nazar aayaa

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:
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Post by khurram_shaikh »

Assalaam alekum,



bahoooot khoooob chhoooooti bahooot umdeh shukriyaa share kernien kaaa dili daad qaboool karo khush raho
RISK IS MY BUSINESS
DANGER IS MY GAME
DONT PLAY WITH ME
BCOZ KHURRAM IS MY NAME
fatimah
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Re: Aapki TaraHi ghazal khoob hei

Post by fatimah »

WEBMASTER wrote:
FATIMA Saahibah

Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,

Aapki TaraHi ghazal dekhkar bahut khushi houi. Din badin aapka andaaz-e-bayaan nikhartaa jaarahaa hei.

bohat bohat shukriya nazir sahib

chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye

MaTlaA her liHaaz se bahut achchaa hei.

navazish

choR ker jab mujhe door jaane lage
dermiyaaN faasalon ko bharaaney lagye

Yeh Husn-e-MaTlaA bhii bahut achchaa hei.

bohat shukriya :-)

un key aaney ki jab bhi hui thi umeed
nit naye khwaab ham phir sajaane lage

Is sheAr ke pahle misreA meiN "jab bhii hui thi umeed" se yooN maloom houtaa hei ke yeh baat sirf maazi kii thii jiska Haal se koiee taAlluq nahiN. Is TaraH se doosre misreA kaa rabT bhii usi TaraH sirf maazi se houjaataa hei. Isko yooN kiyaa jaasaktaa hei agar aapke ziyaadah se ziyaadah alfaaz ko baghair badle ke kahaiN tou:
unke aane kii phir jaag uThi hei umeed
nit naye khwaab phir ham sajaane lage


ji bohat behter :P shukriya

kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

Waah waah Fatima kyaa kehne, bahut hii piyaari gireh lagaayi hei. Mubarakbad.

bohat shukriya nazir sahib

khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage

Yeh sheAr bhii bahut achcha hei.

navazish


ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar fatima
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage

Waah wah Fatima, maqTaA bhii bahut hii khoob hei.

bohat shukriya

Meri daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye is dilkash ghazal ke ashAaar per.

bohat shukriya nazir sahib.aap hamesha jis terha faseelii reply kertey hain mujhey bohat khushii hotii hey.main tah_e_dil sey aap ki mumnoon hun.
isi terha rehnumaaii fermaatey rahiye ga.
bohat shukriya



Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.

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fatimah
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Re: Aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage

Post by fatimah »

Shummu wrote:
chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye
--wah khoob!!!
kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "
--wah nice giraah!!!
khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage
--wah wah ...!
ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar' fatima'
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage
--wow maqta sab se zyadaa pasand aaya!

..is mire pe tumhari ghazla bhi paRhke achcha laga...achche sher kahe hain khaaskar quoted ash'aar zyaada pasand ayae..daad haazir hai :-D

Shumaila


shukriya[/color][/i][/b]
[/quote]



aslaam_u_alikam

bohat bohat shukriya shu :-)
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tahira Masood
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Re: Aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage

Post by tahira Masood »

fatimah wrote:aslaam_u_alikam

guz#43 per kuch mian ney bhi likha hey. jo aap sa key samney hazir hey.
umeed ekrti hun keh aap sab apnii aara sey zaroor nawaazein gey.

chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye

choR ker jab mujhe door jaane lage
dermiyaaN faasalon ko bharaaney lagye

un key aaney ki jab bhi hui thi umeed
nit naye khwaab ham phir sajaane lage

kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage


ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar fatima
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage


shukriya
waah =D>

bohat khoob bohat a'alaa


daad qabul kijiay Fatimah ji
live and let live

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fatimah
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Re: Aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage

Post by fatimah »

sara_j wrote:
fatimah wrote:

chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye

choR ker jab mujhe door jaane lage
dermiyaaN faasalon ko bharaaney lagye

un key aaney ki jab bhi hui thi umeed
nit naye khwaab ham phir sajaane lage

kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage


ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar fatima
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage


shukriya
waah fatima bohat khoob! ghazal ke sabhi ashaar bohat pasand aye, girah tou bohat alaa lagayi ho.

dhair saari daad aur mubarakbaad qubool keejiye.

sara

aslaam_u_alikam

bohat bohat shukriya sara ji
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fatimah
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Post by fatimah »

Sarwar Raz wrote:Fatima SaaHebah: aadaab aur dua'a

yeh t^araHee Ghazal dekh`ee to th`ee lekin maiN Haal hee meN is qaabil huwaa hooN ke :jam kar: yahaaN kaam kar sakooN! aap ke Khayaalaat aur adaa,igee behtaree kee jaanib jaa rahe haiN. is se dilee Khushee huyee. maiN ne neeche Sirf itnaa kiyaa hai keh aap ke Khayaalaat ko qaa,im rakh`te huYe ek aur shakl tajveez kee hai. is se yeh ho gaa keh aap kee soch ke darwaaze kh`uleN ge aur naYe andaaz soojh`eN ge. baat seedh`ee bh`ee kahee jaa saktee hai aur us ko Zaraa saa :teekh`aa: bh`ee kiyaa jaa saktaa hai. aur yeh soch aur mashq se aa jaataa hai. koyee baRee baat naheeN hai. haaN! yeh Z^arooree naheeN hai keh aap mujh` se muttafiq hee hoN!
--------------
chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye

dekh`! taare bhi ab jh`ilmilaane lagey
hum terii yaad sey dil sajaaney lagye!

:jh`ilmilaanaa: behtar hai aur is se aaKhir-e-shab muraad hai. yaadoN se :dil: sajaanaa bh`ee :gh`ar sajaane: se behtar lagaa.
-----------------------------
choR ker jab mujhe door jaane lage
dermiyaaN faasalon ko bharaaney lagye

choR ker woh mujhe door jaane lage
faasale darmiyaaN ke bharaaney lagye

alfaaz^ kee heraa-ph`eree se bunat aur bayaan behtar karne kee koshish kee gayee hai.
---------------
un key aaney ki jab bhi hui thi umeed
nit naye khwaab ham phir sajaane lage

yooN bh`ee keh sakte haiN:

un ke aane kee ham ko huyee th`ee umeed
nit-naYe Khwaab ph`ir woh dikh`aane lage!
-----------------
kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

she'r achh`aa hai. bayaan Zaraa saa teekh`aa kar ke dekh` leN:

meree ulafat kaa kyaa hai Silah bas yehee?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "
------------------------
khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage

Khauf ne aaNdh`iyoN ke sataayaa bohat
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage

lekin :kaun see aaNdh`iyaaN:? yeh sawaal reh gayaa! aur sochiYe.
----------------
ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar fatima
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage

ek shakl yeh hai:

ek lamHe men ujRaa woh gh`ar :Fatima:
jis ko aabaad hote zamaane lage
-------------------------
Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

Sarwar A. Raz wrote:Fatima SaaHebah: aadaab aur dua'a

yeh t^araHee Ghazal dekh`ee to th`ee lekin maiN Haal hee meN is qaabil huwaa hooN ke :jam kar: yahaaN kaam kar sakooN! aap ke Khayaalaat aur adaa,igee behtaree kee jaanib jaa rahe haiN. is se dilee Khushee huyee. maiN ne neeche Sirf itnaa kiyaa hai keh aap ke Khayaalaat ko qaa,im rakh`te huYe ek aur shakl tajveez kee hai. is se yeh ho gaa keh aap kee soch ke darwaaze kh`uleN ge aur naYe andaaz soojh`eN ge. baat seedh`ee bh`ee kahee jaa saktee hai aur us ko Zaraa saa :teekh`aa: bh`ee kiyaa jaa saktaa hai. aur yeh soch aur mashq se aa jaataa hai. koyee baRee baat naheeN hai. haaN! yeh Z^arooree naheeN hai keh aap mujh` se muttafiq hee hoN!

aslaam_u_alikam

sarwar sahib.
aap ko yahan dekh ker bohat khushii ho rahii hey.main aap kii mumnoon hun keh aap ney merii gazal key liye waqt nikaalaa.ALLAH aap ko sehat sey bherpur zindagii aataa karey.
ameen

--------------
chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye

dekh`! taare bhi ab jh`ilmilaane lagey
hum terii yaad sey dil sajaaney lagye!

:jh`ilmilaanaa: behtar hai aur is se aaKhir-e-shab muraad hai. yaadoN se :dil: sajaanaa bh`ee :gh`ar sajaane: se behtar lagaa.

ji bohat behter
-----------------------------
choR ker jab mujhe door jaane lage
dermiyaaN faasalon ko bharaaney lagye

choR ker woh mujhe door jaane lage
faasale darmiyaaN ke bharaaney lagye

alfaaz^ kee heraa-ph`eree se bunat aur bayaan behtar karne kee koshish kee gayee hai.

is sher main yeh tabdelii bhi bohat achii lagii.
shukriya

---------------
un key aaney ki jab bhi hui thi umeed
nit naye khwaab ham phir sajaane lage

yooN bh`ee keh sakte haiN:

un ke aane kee ham ko huyee th`ee umeed
nit-naYe Khwaab ph`ir woh dikh`aane lage!

yeh bhi bohat achaa lagaa
-----------------
kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

she'r achh`aa hai. bayaan Zaraa saa teekh`aa kar ke dekh` leN:

meree ulafat kaa kyaa hai Silah bas yehee?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

ji behter
------------------------
khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage

Khauf ne aaNdh`iyoN ke sataayaa bohat
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage

lekin :kaun see aaNdh`iyaaN:? yeh sawaal reh gayaa! aur sochiYe.

ji purii koshish karun gi
----------------
ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar fatima
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage

ek shakl yeh hai:

ek lamHe men ujRaa woh gh`ar :Fatima:
jis ko aabaad hote zamaane lage

yeh bhi bohat pasand aayaa

bohat shukriya sarwar sahib aap ka
-------------------------
Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:
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Safiya
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Re: Aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage

Post by Safiya »

fatimah wrote:aslaam_u_alikam

guz#43 per kuch mian ney bhi likha hey. jo aap sa key samney hazir hey.
umeed ekrti hun keh aap sab apnii aara sey zaroor nawaazein gey.

chaand taarey bhi jab rooTh jaaney lagey
hum terii yaad sey gher sajaaney lagye

choR ker jab mujhe door jaane lage
dermiyaaN faasalon ko bharaaney lagye

un key aaney ki jab bhi hui thi umeed
nit naye khwaab ham phir sajaane lage

kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage


ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar fatima
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage


shukriya
Fatima saheba
Aadaab, aapka kalaam pehli dafa paDa aur bohot khoob lagha,
achha likha haiy aapne, khoobsoorat andaaz me kaafi umda koshish ki haiy aapne, umeed haiy ke aapki ye koshishen jaari rahengi, aur yunhi hum doston ko apne kalaam se lutf-andoz hone ka maoka detin rahengi.

Safiya
Hashmat Usmani
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Re: Aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage

Post by Hashmat Usmani »

salaam Fatima saaHiba,

aapkii yeh Ghazal bhii mujhe bahot pasand aayii...masha Allah ab to aapke kalaam meN din ba din nikhaar aataa jaa raha hai...mubaarak ho. jo ash'aar mujhe ziyaada pasand aaye vo yeh haiN.

Allah kare zor e qalam aur ziyaada

Hashmat


un key aaney ki jab bhi hui thi umeed
nit naye khwaab ham phir sajaane lage

kia silaa meri ulfat ka mujh ko milaa?
"aap bhi mujh pe tuhmat lagaane lage "

khauf rehne lagaa aandhioN ka hameN
ham charaagh-e-vafaa jab jalaane lage

ik khataa ne ujaaRa vo ghar fatima
jis ko aabaad karte zamaane lage
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