aik sher
Moderator: Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar
- Atiq-ur-Rehman Saffy
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- Posts: 66
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 1:58 pm
- Location: Gujrat, Pakistan
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aik sher
AADAB,
AIK SHER PESH-E-KHIDMAT HAI...
ATIQ-UR-REHMAN SAFFY
AIK SHER PESH-E-KHIDMAT HAI...
ATIQ-UR-REHMAN SAFFY
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- Location: London, England
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salaam Saffy saHib
she'r ka khayaal bahot umda hai, aur is per meri daad bhi Haazir hai.
magar vazn ka kuch mas'ala lag rahaa hai, agar yooN kar deN to kaisa rahe ga :
ae kaash mo'jizaa ye hamaare hi bas meiN ho
dil jis ko chaahata hai vohi dastaras meiN ho
shukria
amjad
she'r ka khayaal bahot umda hai, aur is per meri daad bhi Haazir hai.
magar vazn ka kuch mas'ala lag rahaa hai, agar yooN kar deN to kaisa rahe ga :
ae kaash mo'jizaa ye hamaare hi bas meiN ho
dil jis ko chaahata hai vohi dastaras meiN ho
shukria
amjad
Mire ash'aar ae Iqbal kyuN pyaare na hoN mujhko
mire TooTe hue dil ke ye dard.angez naale haiN
mire TooTe hue dil ke ye dard.angez naale haiN
- Atiq-ur-Rehman Saffy
- -
- Posts: 66
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 1:58 pm
- Location: Gujrat, Pakistan
- Contact:
- Atiq-ur-Rehman Saffy
- -
- Posts: 66
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 1:58 pm
- Location: Gujrat, Pakistan
- Contact:
thanks
Mohtram muzaffer sb, aadab, aap ka bohot bohot shukriya
saffy
saffy
- Atiq-ur-Rehman Saffy
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- Posts: 66
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 1:58 pm
- Location: Gujrat, Pakistan
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- Posts: 219
- Joined: Thu Dec 16, 2004 4:12 am
- Location: Doha Qatar
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Saffy saHib
aadaab arz hai
aap ka she'r vazn meiN na hone se meri muraad ye hai ke ye kisi muravvija beHr meiN nahiN lag rahaa.
lekin jo tajveez maine pesh ki hai use to kam az kam bay.vazn mat kahiye kyuNke voh muravvija beHr meiN hai :
beHr-e-muzaare' akhrab makfoof meHzoob
afaa'eel = maf'oolu___faa'i'laatu__mu.faa'ee'lu__ faa'i'lun
DC = 221__2121__1221__212
taqtee' =
ae kaash = maf_oo_lu
mo'jizah ye = faa_i_laa_tu
hamaare hi = mu_faa_ee_lu
bas meiN ho = faa_i_lun
*************
dil jis ko = maf_oo_lu
chaahata hai = faa_i_laa_tu
vohi dast-= mu_faa_ee_lu
-ras meiN ho = faa_i_lun
vaazeH rahe maine hargiz aap ki islaaH ki koshish nahiN ki, sirf aik tajveez di thi jo yaqeenan vazn meiN hai.
aap apne she'r ki taqtee' pesh kar deN taa'ke mere ilm meiN bhi izaafa ho
shukria
amjad
aadaab arz hai
aap ka she'r vazn meiN na hone se meri muraad ye hai ke ye kisi muravvija beHr meiN nahiN lag rahaa.
lekin jo tajveez maine pesh ki hai use to kam az kam bay.vazn mat kahiye kyuNke voh muravvija beHr meiN hai :
beHr-e-muzaare' akhrab makfoof meHzoob
afaa'eel = maf'oolu___faa'i'laatu__mu.faa'ee'lu__ faa'i'lun
DC = 221__2121__1221__212
taqtee' =
ae kaash = maf_oo_lu
mo'jizah ye = faa_i_laa_tu
hamaare hi = mu_faa_ee_lu
bas meiN ho = faa_i_lun
*************
dil jis ko = maf_oo_lu
chaahata hai = faa_i_laa_tu
vohi dast-= mu_faa_ee_lu
-ras meiN ho = faa_i_lun
vaazeH rahe maine hargiz aap ki islaaH ki koshish nahiN ki, sirf aik tajveez di thi jo yaqeenan vazn meiN hai.
aap apne she'r ki taqtee' pesh kar deN taa'ke mere ilm meiN bhi izaafa ho
shukria
amjad
Mire ash'aar ae Iqbal kyuN pyaare na hoN mujhko
mire TooTe hue dil ke ye dard.angez naale haiN
mire TooTe hue dil ke ye dard.angez naale haiN
- Atiq-ur-Rehman Saffy
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- Posts: 66
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 1:58 pm
- Location: Gujrat, Pakistan
- Contact:
Mohtram Amjad sb, tawaja farmain
Mohtram Amjad Sahib, Asslam u Alikum,
aap kay aitraaz ka mufassal jawab gif file kay ilawa inpage mein bhi saath attach kar raha hoon,
Mulahiza kejy,
Atiq-ur-Rehman Saffy
Gujrat, pakistan
cell 923008725445
aap kay aitraaz ka mufassal jawab gif file kay ilawa inpage mein bhi saath attach kar raha hoon,
Mulahiza kejy,
Atiq-ur-Rehman Saffy
Gujrat, pakistan
cell 923008725445
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- Posts: 219
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- Location: Doha Qatar
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moHtaram Saffy saHib
salaam arz hai
apne she'r per teHqeeq pesh karne ke liye bahot bahot shukria. yaqeenan is se mere ilm meiN izaafa hua hai.
maine aap ke she'r ko qatai taur per bay.vazn nahiN kahaa tha balke vazn ke "mas'ale" ka zikr kia tha. aap ne vazaaHat farmaa di, is ke liye shukria.
umeed hai is mutaalea se mere saath aap ke ilm meiN bhi izaafa hua hoga kyuNke aap ne mere pesh.karda tajveez ko bay.wazn keh diya tha , ye dekhiye :
kisi bhi qism ki dil.shikani ke liye maa'zirat 8)
Amjad
salaam arz hai
apne she'r per teHqeeq pesh karne ke liye bahot bahot shukria. yaqeenan is se mere ilm meiN izaafa hua hai.
maine aap ke she'r ko qatai taur per bay.vazn nahiN kahaa tha balke vazn ke "mas'ale" ka zikr kia tha. aap ne vazaaHat farmaa di, is ke liye shukria.
umeed hai is mutaalea se mere saath aap ke ilm meiN bhi izaafa hua hoga kyuNke aap ne mere pesh.karda tajveez ko bay.wazn keh diya tha , ye dekhiye :
meri bhi aise tamaam dostoN se guzaarish hai ke Khudaara baghair mutaalea kiye kisi ki bhi tajveez ko be.wazan na keh diya kareN.mohtram amjad sahib, aadab,
sher bilkul wazan mein hai, aap iss kee taqtee kar kay bhi check kar saktay hain, albata jo islah aap nay farmai hai uss say bewazan ho gya hai. saffy
kisi bhi qism ki dil.shikani ke liye maa'zirat 8)
Amjad
Mire ash'aar ae Iqbal kyuN pyaare na hoN mujhko
mire TooTe hue dil ke ye dard.angez naale haiN
mire TooTe hue dil ke ye dard.angez naale haiN
- Atiq-ur-Rehman Saffy
- -
- Posts: 66
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 1:58 pm
- Location: Gujrat, Pakistan
- Contact: