Ghazal- Hay judai kia qiamet

[Sohail Malik]

Dosto aaj aik ghazal aap ki raey aur rehnumai kay liay pesh ker raha huN.

hay judai kia qayamat dekhiay
TuTanay waloN ki halat dekhiay

aarzu nah intizar o bey kassi
chaar din Thehray ghaneemat dekhiay

meray baaloN ki siahi chal bassi
dhup chhaoN ki shararet dekhiay

dekh ker bhi maiN nahiN kuch daikhta
dekhnay ki yeh ijaazet dekhiay

but shiken honay ka daawa ker chala
aik majnuN ki baghawet dekhiay

jaaN balab bimaar ki kuch fikr ho
yeh nahiN acchi alamat dekhiay

qed ki fursat baRa jaaN ka ziaN
hay graN baaar-e-faraghet dekhiay

koi mehsusaat say nimTay to kia
aap in ki istiqamat dekhiay

aap kahay barsar-e-pekar haiN
aap say kab thi adawet dekhiay

cheekh ker her ik say kerta huN gilay
kerb say kam meri taqet dekhiay


barha qiSa e derd e dil kehuN
go nahiN matlub shohret dekhiay


wassalam

Sohail Malik

[sbashwar]

Sohail Sahib,
Aapki ghazal bohat pasand ayee. Maherbani farma kar mundarje zail misre ki taqTeeA farmaayie.

barha qiSa e derd e dil kehuN
go nahiN matlub shohret dekhiay

Shukria

[Sohail Malik]

Sohail Sahib,
Aapki ghazal bohat pasand ayee. Maherbani farma kar mundarje zail misre ki taqTeeA farmaayie.

barha qiSa e derd e dil kehuN
go nahiN matlub shohret dekhiay

Shukria

Sbashwar Saaheb kiun pole khulwanay per tulay huay haiN

mujh badnaseeb ko nah to bachpan maiN tekhti likhna naseeb hua aur nah hi kabhi maiN apnay ashaar ki taqtee kernay ki zehmat kerta huN. nihaet eemandaranah erz kerta huN keh meray ashaar ki metering lashaur maiN hoti hay. ghalat sahih ka faisila wahaN hi hota hay. Phir us kay baad taqtee kay postmortwm ka kaam maiN naqideen kay liay chhoR daita huN aakhir unhoN nay bhi to roTi kamani hay.

Bahar haal aap kay hukem per teqtee ki koshish ker daita huN

l-s-l-l l-s-l-l l-s-l

fa-i-la-tun fa-i-la-tun fa-i-lun


ba-r-ha-qiS Sa-e-der-de dil-k-huN
go-ne-hiN-mat lu-b-shuh-ret de-khi-aye


QiSSa maiN Saad tashdeed kay saath hay


Regards

Sohail Malik

[Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar]

Dosto aaj aik ghazal aap ki raey aur rehnumai kay liay pesh ker raha huN.

hay judai kia qayamat dekhiay
TuTanay waloN ki halat dekhiay

aarzu nah intizar o bey kassi
chaar din Thehray ghaneemat dekhiay

meray baaloN ki siahi chal bassi
dhup chhaoN ki shararet dekhiay

dekh ker bhi maiN nahiN kuch daikhta
dekhnay ki yeh ijaazet dekhiay

but shiken honay ka daawa ker chala
aik majnuN ki baghawet dekhiay

jaaN balab bimaar ki kuch fikr ho
yeh nahiN acchi alamat dekhiay

qed ki fursat baRa jaaN ka ziaN
hay graN baaar-e-faraghet dekhiay

koi mehsusaat say nimTay to kia
aap in ki istiqamat dekhiay

aap kahay barsar-e-pekar haiN
aap say kab thi adawet dekhiay

cheekh ker her ik say kerta huN gilay
kerb say kam meri taqet dekhiay


barha qiSa e derd e dil kehuN
go nahiN matlub shohret dekhiay


wassalam

Sohail Malik

moHtaram Sohail Malik SaHib aadaab!

aap kee tazah Ghazak dekh~ee kiya kehne, waah Qiblah waqae'ee lut^f hee aa geya. meree dilee dad qubool kijiye!

mujh~e S. Bashwar SaHib ka isharah ke t^araf naz^ar paRee hai. mera kheyaal hai. dekh~ne meN koee Harj naheeN.

miSra'-e-ula beHer meN laiye!
aek mumkin hai yeh Surat dekh~kiye!

1,
QiSSah-e-dil barha maiN keh chuka
"gao naheeN mat^loob shuhrat dekh~kiye"

Yaa

2,
keh chuka hooN QiSSah-e-dil barha!
"gao naheeN mat^loob shuhrat dekh~kiye"

khush raheeN!

Wassalam
Muz^affar

[muhammad_19k]

hay judai kia qayamat dekhiay
TuTanay waloN ki halat dekhiay

maira khyaal hai ke matlA par iss se zydaa meHnat honi chahiaye.


aarzu nah intizar o bey kassi
chaar din Thehray ghaneemat dekhiay

intizor o bay kasi aik tarkeeb hoee. Ub is se pehlay na hai to matlab huwa ke na intezaar hai na bay basi.


meray baaloN ki siahi chal bassi
dhup chhaoN ki shararet dekhiay

bohat khoob.

dekh ker bhi maiN nahiN kuch daikhta
dekhnay ki yeh ijaazet dekhiay

bohat khoob

but shiken honay ka daawa ker chala
aik majnuN ki baghawet dekhiay

is ka mafhoom mujh par clear naheeN huwaa. majnooN ka agar but parasti (but shikni ke reference meiN ) ke saath koi taaluq hai to us ki mujhe samajh naheeN aa rahi. Aap ke zahn meiN zaroor kuch ho ga. agar wazaHat karaiN to shukr guzar hooN ga. "aik majnooN" ki jagah "ik pujaari" bhi ho saktaa hai. agar aap ne majnooN kissi khaaS wajaa se istemaal naheeN kiyaa toa.

jaaN balab bimaar ki kuch fikr ho
yeh nahiN acchi alamat dekhiay

konsi alamat? bimari ki alamat? fikr na karne ki alamat? ya koi aor Ishaara bohat clear naheeN hai.

qed ki fursat baRa jaaN ka ziaN
hay graN baaar-e-faraghet dekhiay

pehla miSra meiN qed ki fursat? mairaa khyaal hai ke "qaid meiN furSat" istemaal karnaa chahiaye. ye is taraH mumkin hai. Qaid meiN furSat hai ik jaaN ka ziaN?

koi mehsusaat say nimTay to kia
aap in ki istiqamat dekhiay

iss ke baaray meiN kia khyaal hai.

Kaise meHsusaat say nimtay koi
aap dil ki istiqaamat daikhiaye.

aap kahay barsar-e-pekar haiN
aap say kab thi adawet dekhiay


bohat khoob. Kaahay ki jagah. “kyooNkar” ki bhi option hai.

cheekh ker maiN her kissi say dukh kahuN
go nahiN matlub shohret dekhiay

cheekh ke saath dard zydaa bhalaa ho ga.

Cheek kar kartaa hooN meiN iZhaar e dard
Karb se kam mairi Taaqat daikhiaye.

barha qiSa e derd e dil kehuN
go nahiN matlub shohret dekhiay

Is sha’er par muzaffar SaHeb ki raa-aye bohat aham hai.



Aap ka mukhliS,
MUHAMMAD K. SIDDIQUI

[Sohail Malik]

moHtaram Sohail Malik SaHib aadaab!

aap kee tazah Ghazak dekh~ee kiya kehne, waah Qiblah waqae'ee lut^f hee aa geya. meree dilee dad qubool kijiye!

mujh~e S. Bashwar SaHib ka isharah ke t^araf naz^ar paRee hai. mera kheyaal hai. dekh~ne meN koee Harj naheeN.

miSra'-e-ula beHer meN laiye!
aek mumkin hai yeh Surat dekh~kiye!

1,
QiSSah-e-dil barha maiN keh chuka
"gao naheeN mat^loob shuhrat dekh~kiye"
A

2,
keh chuka hooN QiSSah-e-dil barha!
"gao naheeN mat^loob shuhrat dekh~kiye"

khush raheeN!

Wassalam
Muz^affar[/quote]

Muzaffar SaaHeb
Assalam o alaekum

Tareef ka bohat shukria

Aap ka tajweez kerdah yeh misra rawani kay lihaz say khub hay

'QiSSah-e-dil barha maiN keh chuka'

sirf hichkichaheT is baat ki hay keh QiSSa-e-dil aur QiSSa-e-derd-e-dil

kay maani say jo ferq aata hay woh mera maqsud nahiN hay.

baherhaal aap ki tajweez per bohat mamnoon huN ager derd-e-dil khap gaya to theek wernah aap ka inayet kerdah misrah sir aankhoN per.

wassalam
sohail malik

[muhammad_19k]

Doctor Sb,

ye tajweez daikiaye,

dard e dil ka barihaa qiSSa kahooN

ya


dar e dil ka barihaa charchaa karooN

doosri Soorat mujhe nisabtan behtar lag rahi hai. laazmi baat hai aap ki baa adaa hoti hai ke naheen ye toa aap hi samajh sakte haiN.

regards,

MUHAMMAD K. SIDDIQUI.

[Sohail Malik]

Siddiqui Saaheb
assalam o alaekum


------------------------

hay judai kia qayamat dekhiay
TuTanay waloN ki halat dekhiay

maira khyaal hai ke matlA par iss se zydaa meHnat honi chahiaye.


aji yeh zulm nah kijiay---- mehnet say to pehlay hi ji churatay haiN.
waisay kis lihaz say aap ko is maiN kami nazer ayi

------------------------------------
aarzu nah intizar o bey kassi
chaar din Thehray ghaneemat dekhiay

intizor o bay kasi aik tarkeeb hoee. Ub is se pehlay na hai to matlab huwa ke na intezaar hai na bay basi.



ji aisa hi hay

ab us sher ko yaad kijiay
'umr-e-deraz mang kay laey thay char din
do arzu maiN kuT gaey do intizar maiN'

so arzo intezar aur baykassi nah ho to char din ki zindigi bhi ghaneemat hay
---------------------------------------------------------------


meray baaloN ki siahi chal bassi
dhup chhaoN ki shararet dekhiay

bohat khoob.

shukria
---------------------------------

dekh ker bhi maiN nahiN kuch daikhta
dekhnay ki yeh ijaazet dekhiay

bohat khoob

shukria
---------------------------------

but shiken honay ka daawa ker chala
aik majnuN ki baghawet dekhiay

is ka mafhoom mujh par clear naheeN huwaa. majnooN ka agar but parasti (but shikni ke reference meiN ) ke saath koi taaluq hai to us ki mujhe samajh naheeN aa rahi. Aap ke zahn meiN zaroor kuch ho ga. agar wazaHat karaiN to shukr guzar hooN ga. "aik majnooN" ki jagah "ik pujaari" bhi ho saktaa hai. agar aap ne majnooN kissi khaaS wajaa se istemaal naheeN kiyaa toa.

pujari yuN nahiN keh mazhab is sher ka mozu nahiN hay

shaeri maiN mehboobah kay ssath aashiq ka taaluq akser but aur pujari kay taaluq ki terah hi dikhaya jaata hay

so majnuN ka but shikani ka daawa aik riwaet say baghawet kay istiaray kay tour per laya huN jahaN mazkura majnuN apnay riwaeti majazi ishq kay taaluq ko badalnay per aamadah ho ker baghawet ka alam buland kerta nazer aata hay.
-------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------------

jaaN balab bimaar ki kuch fikr ho
yeh nahiN acchi alamat dekhiay

konsi alamat? bimari ki alamat? fikr na karne ki alamat? ya koi aor Ishaara bohat clear naheeN hai.

fikr na karne ki alamat? yehi pehla khayal aana chahihay, wegerna koi aur alamet hoti to us ka ziker kerna zaruri hota.
----------------------------------------------

qed ki fursat baRa jaaN ka ziaN
hay graN baaar-e-faraghet dekhiay

pehla miSra meiN qed ki fursat? mairaa khyaal hai ke "qaid meiN furSat" istemaal karnaa chahiaye. ye is taraH mumkin hai. Qaid meiN furSat hai ik jaaN ka ziaN?

aap ki tajweez bhi achi hay laikin filhaal to mujhay apnay misray maiN tabdeeli kernay ki koi khas wajah nahiN nazer aati halankeh aik hi baat kai andaz say kehi ja sakti hay.


Waisay aap ghour kijiay ga keh 'qaid/ghulami' kay mozu say mutaliq meray kai ashaar aap ko nazer ayeN gay aur jin per akser log aetiraz kertay huay bhi nazer ayeN gay. Aakhir aisa kiuN hay.

Is ki aik khas wajah hay------maiN jis halet ka izhar kerna chahta huN woh pehlay pes manzer ki tayari chahti hay aur us per kuch waqt lagay ga.
InshaAllah dheeray dheeray Qaid say mutaliq falsafa bhi khulta chala jaey ga. zera woh sher yaad kijiay jahaN aik mertaba pehlay discussion ho chuki hay.

kaaT nah day ger ghulami derd kay ehsaas ko
ashk ki zanjeer dekhaiN beybassi kay haath maiN
--------------------------------------------------
koi mehsusaat say nimTay to kia
aap in ki istiqamat dekhiay

iss ke baaray meiN kia khyaal hai.

Kaise meHsusaat say nimtay koi
aap dil ki istiqaamat daikhiaye.

yahaN merkazi khayal mehsusat ki istiqamat hay dil ki nahiN.


--------------------------------------------------------------

aap kahay barsar-e-pekar haiN
aap say kab thi adawet dekhiay


bohat khoob. Kaahay ki jagah. “kyooNkar” ki bhi option hai.

donoN kay maani maiN bohat ferq hay aur meray khayal say kahay hi theek hay.
--------------------------------------------------------------------

cheekh ker maiN her kissi say dukh kahuN
go nahiN matlub shohret dekhiay

cheekh ke saath dard zydaa bhalaa ho ga.

Cheek kar kartaa hooN meiN iZhaar e dard
Karb se kam mairi Taaqat daikhiaye.


Urdu tehreer maiN dekhiay to maiN nay gillay bhi istemal kia hay

asal maiN is sher maiN merkazi khayal cheekh ker izhar kerna hay.

Aap ki tajweez ikhtiar kernay maiN yuN to koi muzaiqa nahiN hay laikiN zera dekhiay aap ka misra derd per aa ker ruknay laga hay aur rawani mutacir ho rehi hay.
--------------------------------------------------------

barha qiSa e derd e dil kehuN
go nahiN matlub shohret dekhiay

Is sha’er par muzaffar SaHeb ki raa-aye bohat aham hai.


ji maiN muzaffar sahib ki tajweed ko saad ker chuka huN.


------------------------------------------------------

Siddiqui SaaHeb

Aap ki tajaweez ka maiN bohat mamnoon huN

aap ki mehrbani hay keh mujhay apnay qimti waqt say nawaztay haiN aur kai naey andaz bhi sochnay kay liay detay haiN.

aendah bhi yunhi tajaweez detay rehihay

ager aap ki kissi tajweez say ittefaq nahiN kerta to is ka qeten yeh maqsad nahiN keh mujhay aap ki tajweez ki qader nahiN balkeh sirf yeh keh is waqt meri eemandarana raey maiN jo baat maiN ikhtiar ker raha huN wohi Theek hay.


Wassalam

khair andesh

sohail malik

[Sohail Malik]

Doctor Sb,



dar e dil ka barihaa charchaa karooN


MUHAMMAD K. SIDDIQUI.

SIDDIQUI Saaheb

yeh surat behtereen hau aur is ko

shukriay kay saath qabul kerta huN

khush rehihay

khush qismet huN keh aap aur muzaffar saaheb jaisay dost saath dainay kay liay mojud haiN

wassalam
sohai malik

[muhammad_19k]

Siddiqui Saaheb
assalam o alaekum

Waaikum us Salam Doctor SaHeb,

------------------------

hay judai kia qayamat dekhiay
TuTanay waloN ki halat dekhiay

maira khyaal hai ke matlA par iss se zydaa meHnat honi chahiaye.


aji yeh zulm nah kijiay---- mehnet say to pehlay hi ji churatay haiN.
waisay kis lihaz say aap ko is maiN kami nazer ayi

meHnat se muraad hai khyaal ya Izhaar donoaN meiN se kissi aik shay ko buland karnaa chahiaye. aap bohat achchhay sha'ir haiN aor bohat achchay mazaameen par likhte haiN. iss leeaye khyaal kartaa hooN ke aap har sha'er bohat achcha honaa chahiaye. So iss lee aisaa keh diyaa.

------------------------------------

aarzu nah intizar o bey kassi
chaar din Thehray ghaneemat dekhiay

intizor o bay kasi aik tarkeeb hoee. Ub is se pehlay na hai to matlab huwa ke na intezaar hai na bay basi.



ji aisa hi hay

ab us sher ko yaad kijiay
'umr-e-deraz mang kay laey thay char din
do arzu maiN kuT gaey do intizar maiN'

so arzo intezar aur baykassi nah ho to char din ki zindigi bhi ghaneemat hay

maazirat ke saath arz hai ke meiN aap ke sha'er se ye mafhoom nikaalne se QaSir hooN. arzo intezar aur baykassi nah ho to char din ki zindigi bhi ghaneemat hay

but shiken honay ka daawa ker chala
aik majnuN ki baghawet dekhiay

is ka mafhoom mujh par clear naheeN huwaa. majnooN ka agar but parasti (but shikni ke reference meiN ) ke saath koi taaluq hai to us ki mujhe samajh naheeN aa rahi. Aap ke zahn meiN zaroor kuch ho ga. agar wazaHat karaiN to shukr guzar hooN ga. "aik majnooN" ki jagah "ik pujaari" bhi ho saktaa hai. agar aap ne majnooN kissi khaaS wajaa se istemaal naheeN kiyaa toa.

pujari yuN nahiN keh mazhab is sher ka mozu nahiN hay

shaeri maiN mehboobah kay ssath aashiq ka taaluq akser but aur pujari kay taaluq ki terah hi dikhaya jaata hay

so majnuN ka but shikani ka daawa aik riwaet say baghawet kay istiaray kay tour per laya huN jahaN mazkura majnuN apnay riwaeti majazi ishq kay taaluq ko badalnay per aamadah ho ker baghawet ka alam buland kerta nazer aata hay.

aap ki wazaaHat ka shukriyaa.

jaaN balab bimaar ki kuch fikr ho
yeh nahiN acchi alamat dekhiay

konsi alamat? bimari ki alamat? fikr na karne ki alamat? ya koi aor Ishaara bohat clear naheeN hai.

fikr na karne ki alamat? yehi pehla khayal aana chahihay, wegerna koi aur alamet hoti to us ka ziker kerna zaruri hota.

haaM mujh is par kuch aor aaraa ka intezaar rahay ga

----------------------------------------------

qed ki fursat baRa jaaN ka ziaN
hay graN baaar-e-faraghet dekhiay

pehla miSra meiN qed ki fursat? mairaa khyaal hai ke "qaid meiN furSat" istemaal karnaa chahiaye. ye is taraH mumkin hai. Qaid meiN furSat hai ik jaaN ka ziaN?

aap ki tajweez bhi achi hay laikin filhaal to mujhay apnay misray maiN tabdeeli kernay ki koi khas wajah nahiN nazer aati halankeh aik hi baat kai andaz say kehi ja sakti hay.


Waisay aap ghour kijiay ga keh 'qaid/ghulami' kay mozu say mutaliq meray kai ashaar aap ko nazer ayeN gay aur jin per akser log aetiraz kertay huay bhi nazer ayeN gay. Aakhir aisa kiuN hay.

Is ki aik khas wajah hay------maiN jis halet ka izhar kerna chahta huN woh pehlay pes manzer ki tayari chahti hay aur us per kuch waqt lagay ga.
InshaAllah dheeray dheeray Qaid say mutaliq falsafa bhi khulta chala jaey ga. zera woh sher yaad kijiay jahaN aik mertaba pehlay discussion ho chuki hay.

kaaT nah day ger ghulami derd kay ehsaas ko
ashk ki zanjeer dekhaiN beybassi kay haath maiN

mujhe khadsha hai ke qaid ki fursat zubandani ke a'etibaar se kuch umdaa naheeN.
--------------------------------------------------

cheekh ker maiN her kissi say dukh kahuN
go nahiN matlub shohret dekhiay

cheekh ke saath dard zydaa bhalaa ho ga.

Cheek kar kartaa hooN meiN iZhaar e dard
Karb se kam mairi Taaqat daikhiaye.


Urdu tehreer maiN dekhiay to maiN nay gillay bhi istemal kia hay

asal maiN is sher maiN merkazi khayal cheekh ker izhar kerna hay.

Aap ki tajweez ikhtiar kernay maiN yuN to koi muzaiqa nahiN hay laikiN zera dekhiay aap ka misra derd per aa ker ruknay laga hay aur rawani mutacir ho rehi hay.

1. gilaa ka izhaar bhi cheekh kar karnaa zyadaa fitri naheeN hai.
2. pehla mistra, Faailaatun, faailatun faailaat ke wazn par hai. aor maira khyaal hai ke ye beHr is ki ijaazat daiti hai.
--------------------------------------------------------

baaqi tamaam tashreeHat ke leeaye aap ka shukrguzaar hooN

Aap ki tajaweez ka maiN bohat mamnoon huN

aap ki mehrbani hay keh mujhay apnay qimti waqt say nawaztay haiN aur kai naey andaz bhi sochnay kay liay detay haiN.

aendah bhi yunhi tajaweez detay rehihay

aap ki moHabbat ka shukriya

ager aap ki kissi tajweez say ittefaq nahiN kerta to is ka qeten yeh maqsad nahiN keh mujhay aap ki tajweez ki qader nahiN balkeh sirf yeh keh is waqt meri eemandarana raey maiN jo baat maiN ikhtiar ker raha huN wohi Theek hay.

Ji meiN is marHalay ko bohat khoobi se samajhtaa hooN . aap chandaaN bhi fikr na kijiaye.



Khairandesh,
MUHAMMAD K. SIDDIQUI