Guzarish # 29 - Meri naacheez Ghazal
Moderator: Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar
-
jawaid badauni
- -
- Posts: 810
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 5:38 am
- Contact:
Guzarish # 29 - Meri naacheez Ghazal
Janab-e sadr ki ijazat se apni taza Ghazal pesh kar raha hooN.
Ummid hai apni graNqadr aara se nawazeNge. Ek baar phir
Ghazal ki riwayatoN se haTkar kuch naye maZameen per sher
kahne ki koshish ki hai jiske liye maAzrat Khuwaah hooN.
Aapka MuKhliS
Jawaid Badauni
KhulooS baaNt ke apna yahaN wahaN maiN ne
banaa liya hai moHabbat ka kaarwaN maiN ne
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
maiN ek rote huwey ko kabhi haNsa nah sakaa
“tamam umr guzaaree hai raigaaN maiN ne”
basee haiN aaj bhi Tiflee ki chund yaadoN meN
woh jo banayi theeN kaGhaz ki kashtiyaaN maiN ne
jise talab ho woh Khud rasta talash kare
miTa diye haiN sabhee paaoN ke nishaN maiN ne
bahar aai hai gulshan meN maiN na manooNga
bohat qareeb se dekha hai gulsitaaN maiN ne
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
zubaaN pe aa gaya “Jawaid” she’r “Akbar” ka
saRak pe dekheeN jo be pardah laRkiyaaN maiN ne
Last edited by jawaid badauni on Sat Jun 02, 2007 2:43 pm, edited 2 times in total.
-
haamidbaaqri
- -
- Posts: 567
- Joined: Tue Oct 11, 2005 10:50 am
- Location: bangalore, india 00-91-9341253797
- Contact:
Re: Guzarish # 29 - Meri naacheez Ghazal
jawaid badauni wrote:
Janab-e sadr ki ijazat se apni taza Ghazal pesh kar raha hooN.
Ummid hai apni graNqadr aara se nawazeNge. Ek baar phir
Ghazal ki riwayatoN se haTkar kuch naye maZameen per sher
kahne ki koshish ki hai jiske liye maAzrat Khuwaah hooN.
Aapka MuKhliS
Jawaid Badauni
KhulooS baaNt ke apna yahaN wahaN maiN ne
banaa liya hai moHabbat ka kaarwaN maiN ne
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
maiN ek rote huwey ko kabhi haNsa nah sakaa
“tamam umr guzaaree hai raigaaN maiN ne”
abhee talak haiN miri Tiflegi ki yaadoN meN
woh jo banayi theeN kaGhaz ki kashtiyaaN maiN ne
jise talab ho woh Khud rasta talash kare
miTa diye haiN sabhee paaoN ke nishaN maiN ne
bahar aai hai gulshan meN maiN na manooNga
bohat qareeb se dekha hai gulsitaaN maiN ne
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
zubaaN pe aa gaya “Jawaid” she’r “Akbar” ka
saRak pe dekheeN jo be pardah laRkiyaaN maiN ne
azeez bhai jawaid saahib
bahut acchee ghazal hai yeh aapki.
bahut kuch seekhnay ko milta hai aapki kaavishoN say.
mazkoora ghazal ki girah hameN bahut pasand aayee.
hamaari dilee daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayeN
.allah(sbhnwt)karay zoray qalam aur ziyaadah
aapka apna
haamidbaaqari
mai.n to karta nahi.n kuch aur ebaadat ke siwa
paas mere nahi.n kuch aur mohabbat ke siwa
paas mere nahi.n kuch aur mohabbat ke siwa
-
muhammad_19k
- -
- Posts: 540
- Joined: Wed Nov 22, 2006 8:36 am
- Location: Lahore
- Contact:
Salam Jawaid SaHeb,
aik shaandaar ghazal par mubarakbaad qubool kijiaye. meN ghazal ya shaairi ka intaa zydaa tajurbaa naheeN rakhtaa laikin jo mazmoon aap ne baandhay haiN woh na baandhana, maire khyaal meN, ghazal ke saath ziadti ho gi.
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
Allah aap ko khush rakhay.
haamid saHeb theek farmaateN haiN. giraah bohat shaandaar hai. mujhe bhi ghazal ka sab se achchha sher "giraah" walaa hi lagaa.
Khairandesh
Muhammad K. Siddiqui
aik shaandaar ghazal par mubarakbaad qubool kijiaye. meN ghazal ya shaairi ka intaa zydaa tajurbaa naheeN rakhtaa laikin jo mazmoon aap ne baandhay haiN woh na baandhana, maire khyaal meN, ghazal ke saath ziadti ho gi.
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
Allah aap ko khush rakhay.
haamid saHeb theek farmaateN haiN. giraah bohat shaandaar hai. mujhe bhi ghazal ka sab se achchha sher "giraah" walaa hi lagaa.
Khairandesh
Muhammad K. Siddiqui
Muhammad K. Siddiqui.
+92 321 4435273
938-C-Faisal Town, Lahore.
Pakistan.
+92 42 111516516
muhammad_19k@hotmail.com
+92 321 4435273
938-C-Faisal Town, Lahore.
Pakistan.
+92 42 111516516
muhammad_19k@hotmail.com
-
jawaid badauni
- -
- Posts: 810
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 5:38 am
- Contact:
Re: Guzarish # 29 - Meri naacheez Ghazal
haamidbaaqri wrote:jawaid badauni wrote:
Janab-e sadr ki ijazat se apni taza Ghazal pesh kar raha hooN.
Ummid hai apni graNqadr aara se nawazeNge. Ek baar phir
Ghazal ki riwayatoN se haTkar kuch naye maZameen per sher
kahne ki koshish ki hai jiske liye maAzrat Khuwaah hooN.
Aapka MuKhliS
Jawaid Badauni
KhulooS baaNt ke apna yahaN wahaN maiN ne
banaa liya hai moHabbat ka kaarwaN maiN ne
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
maiN ek rote huwey ko kabhi haNsa nah sakaa
“tamam umr guzaaree hai raigaaN maiN ne”
abhee talak haiN miri Tiflegi ki yaadoN meN
woh jo banayi theeN kaGhaz ki kashtiyaaN maiN ne
jise talab ho woh Khud rasta talash kare
miTa diye haiN sabhee paaoN ke nishaN maiN ne
bahar aai hai gulshan meN maiN na manooNga
bohat qareeb se dekha hai gulsitaaN maiN ne
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
zubaaN pe aa gaya “Jawaid” she’r “Akbar” ka
saRak pe dekheeN jo be pardah laRkiyaaN maiN ne
azeez bhai jawaid saahib
bahut acchee ghazal hai yeh aapki.
bahut kuch seekhnay ko milta hai aapki kaavishoN say.
mazkoora ghazal ki girah hameN bahut pasand aayee.
hamaari dilee daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayeN
allah(sbhnwt)karay zoray qalam aur ziyaadah
aapka apna
haamidbaaqari
Azeezi Haamid Baaqri,
Salam aur doa
Ghazal ki pazeeraayee ke liye maiN aap ka behud mamnoon hooN. Ab is zameen meN aap ki taza Ghazal ka intezaar hai. MaiN ne jo tazmeen ki hai, is miSrey meN ek mash'hoor.e zaman sher se istafadah HaSil karne ki koshish ki hai. Agar bat ko apne andaz se, apni zameen meN apne readeef qafiyoN ke saath kaha jaye jo kise ke Khayaal se istafadah HaSil karna nah sirf jaaiz hai yeh us shayar ke liye bohat baRa Khiraj.e aqeedat hai. UnhoN ne kuch yuuN kaha tha, "raah chalte kisee rote ko haNsaya jaye" magar maiN ne unse ek qadam aage jaker kaha hai keh agar yeh nah kita tou saree zindage bekar gaii.
Ummid hai aap ke mizaaj baKhair hoNge.
MuKhliS
Jawaid
-
jawaid badauni
- -
- Posts: 810
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 5:38 am
- Contact:
muhammad_19k wrote:Salam Jawaid SaHeb,
aik shaandaar ghazal par mubarakbaad qubool kijiaye. meN ghazal ya shaairi ka intaa zydaa tajurbaa naheeN rakhtaa laikin jo mazmoon aap ne baandhay haiN woh na baandhana, maire khyaal meN, ghazal ke saath ziadti ho gi.
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
Allah aap ko khush rakhay.
haamid saHeb theek farmaateN haiN. giraah bohat shaandaar hai. mujhe bhi ghazal ka sab se achchha sher "giraah" walaa hi lagaa.
Khairandesh
Muhammad K. Siddiqui
Khawar SaaHab,
aadaab
Ghazal ki pazeeraayee ke liye mamnoon hooN. Agar ashAr naye maZameen pe kahe jayeN tou purane logoN ko e'traaz hota hai woh isey Ghazal nahiN maante. Agar sirf purane maZameen per hi kaha jaye tou mujhe Khud taskeen nahiN hoti. Ab zahir hai Ghazal tou maiN apni taskeen ke liye hi kahta hooN. Aap ne meri himmat afzaaii farmaii hai is liye ek baar phir aap ka shukriya.
MuKhliS
Jawaid
-
Sohail Malik
- -
- Posts: 124
- Joined: Sun Apr 08, 2007 11:51 am
Re: Guzarish # 29 - Meri naacheez Ghazal
Janab jawaid badauni Saaheb Assalam o alaekum!
aap ki khubsuret ghazal peRhi dilli daad qabul kijiay
------------------------------------------------------
KhulooS baaNt ke apna yahaN wahaN maiN ne
banaa liya hai moHabbat ka kaarwaN maiN ne
bohat khub khayal hay janab
---------------------------------------------------
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
is sher maiN mujhay yeh wazeh nahiN ho paya keh aya aap nay 'girtay huay makaN' say murad ameeroN ki bastioN maiN ghareeboN kay makan
liay haiN ya yeh istiaray kay tour per istemaal kia hay?
------------------------------------------------------
maiN ek rote huwey ko kabhi haNsa nah sakaa
“tamam umr guzaaree hai raigaaN maiN ne”
girah bohat achi hay
----------------------------------------------
abhee talak haiN miri Tiflegi ki yaadoN meN
woh jo banayi theeN kaGhaz ki kashtiyaaN maiN ne
bachpan ki haseen yadaiN
------------------------------------------------------
jise talab ho woh Khud rasta talash kare
miTa diye haiN sabhee paaoN ke nishaN maiN ne
yeh khayal wazahet chahta hay keh aap nay paoN kay nishaan kis niet say miTaey? ager niet yeh hay keh aap yeh nahiN chahtay keh aap kissi ki rehnumai ka baes banaiN to yeh woh wateera hay jis kay baaray maiN kaha jaata hay keh falaN kitnay hi aloom seenay maiN lay ker chala gaya jo yaqeenan ahsen naheeN hay. aur ager maqsed yeh hay keh aap chahtay haiN keh talabgar ki koshish aur mehnet hi us ki terbiet ka baes banti hay to yeh aik achi baat hay.
-----------------------------------------------
bahar aai hai gulshan meN maiN na manooNga
bohat qareeb se dekha hai gulsitaaN maiN ne
acha sher hay
-----------------------------------
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
bohat khub janab. meri nacheez raey maiN to haqeeat per mabni baatoN ko ghazal ka mozu bana ker ham us ka daman kushada hi keraiN gay koi nuqsan to nahiN pohanchaeN gay.
-----------------------------------
zubaaN pe aa gaya “Jawaid” she’r “Akbar” ka
saRak pe dekheeN jo be pardah laRkiyaaN maiN ne
bohat khub janab
---------------------
wassalam
Sohail Malik
aap ki khubsuret ghazal peRhi dilli daad qabul kijiay
------------------------------------------------------
KhulooS baaNt ke apna yahaN wahaN maiN ne
banaa liya hai moHabbat ka kaarwaN maiN ne
bohat khub khayal hay janab
---------------------------------------------------
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
is sher maiN mujhay yeh wazeh nahiN ho paya keh aya aap nay 'girtay huay makaN' say murad ameeroN ki bastioN maiN ghareeboN kay makan
liay haiN ya yeh istiaray kay tour per istemaal kia hay?
------------------------------------------------------
maiN ek rote huwey ko kabhi haNsa nah sakaa
“tamam umr guzaaree hai raigaaN maiN ne”
girah bohat achi hay
----------------------------------------------
abhee talak haiN miri Tiflegi ki yaadoN meN
woh jo banayi theeN kaGhaz ki kashtiyaaN maiN ne
bachpan ki haseen yadaiN
------------------------------------------------------
jise talab ho woh Khud rasta talash kare
miTa diye haiN sabhee paaoN ke nishaN maiN ne
yeh khayal wazahet chahta hay keh aap nay paoN kay nishaan kis niet say miTaey? ager niet yeh hay keh aap yeh nahiN chahtay keh aap kissi ki rehnumai ka baes banaiN to yeh woh wateera hay jis kay baaray maiN kaha jaata hay keh falaN kitnay hi aloom seenay maiN lay ker chala gaya jo yaqeenan ahsen naheeN hay. aur ager maqsed yeh hay keh aap chahtay haiN keh talabgar ki koshish aur mehnet hi us ki terbiet ka baes banti hay to yeh aik achi baat hay.
-----------------------------------------------
bahar aai hai gulshan meN maiN na manooNga
bohat qareeb se dekha hai gulsitaaN maiN ne
acha sher hay
-----------------------------------
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
bohat khub janab. meri nacheez raey maiN to haqeeat per mabni baatoN ko ghazal ka mozu bana ker ham us ka daman kushada hi keraiN gay koi nuqsan to nahiN pohanchaeN gay.
-----------------------------------
zubaaN pe aa gaya “Jawaid” she’r “Akbar” ka
saRak pe dekheeN jo be pardah laRkiyaaN maiN ne
bohat khub janab
---------------------
wassalam
Sohail Malik
-
jawaid badauni
- -
- Posts: 810
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 5:38 am
- Contact:
Re: Guzarish # 29 - Meri naacheez Ghazal
Sohail Malik wrote:----------------Janab jawaid badauni Saaheb Assalam o alaekum!
aap ki khubsuret ghazal peRhi dilli daad qabul kijiay
Bohat bohat shukriya Suhail Malik SaaHab
--------------------------------------
KhulooS baaNt ke apna yahaN wahaN maiN ne
banaa liya hai moHabbat ka kaarwaN maiN ne
bohat khub khayal hay janab
Shukriya---------------------------------------------------
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
is sher maiN mujhay yeh wazeh nahiN ho paya keh aya aap nay 'girtay huay makaN' say murad ameeroN ki bastioN maiN ghareeboN kay makan
liay haiN ya yeh istiaray kay tour per istemaal kia hay?
Aapka doosra Khyaal durust haimaiN ne abtaur ishtiyara hi istaimal kiya hai.------------------------------------------------------
maiN ek rote huwey ko kabhi haNsa nah sakaa
“tamam umr guzaaree hai raigaaN maiN ne”
girah bohat achi hay
Behud mamnoon hooN aap ka.----------------------------------------------
abhee talak haiN miri Tiflegi ki yaadoN meN
woh jo banayi theeN kaGhaz ki kashtiyaaN maiN ne
bachpan ki haseen yadaiN
------------------------------------------------------
jise talab ho woh Khud rasta talash kare
miTa diye haiN sabhee paaoN ke nishaN maiN ne
yeh khayal wazahet chahta hay keh aap nay paoN kay nishaan kis niet say miTaey? ager niet yeh hay keh aap yeh nahiN chahtay keh aap kissi ki rehnumai ka baes banaiN to yeh woh wateera hay jis kay baaray maiN kaha jaata hay keh falaN kitnay hi aloom seenay maiN lay ker chala gaya jo yaqeenan ahsen naheeN hay. aur ager maqsed yeh hay keh aap chahtay haiN keh talabgar ki koshish aur mehnet hi us ki terbiet ka baes banti hay to yeh aik achi baat hay
Ji yahaN bhi aap ka doosra Khayaal hi durust hai. Talabgaar ke ander meHnat, lagan aur Khud apni koshish se manzil paane ka jazba paida karna chaahiye. -----------------------------------------------
bahar aai hai gulshan meN maiN na manooNga
bohat qareeb se dekha hai gulsitaaN maiN ne
acha sher hay
Shukriya Janab.-----------------------------------
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
bohat khub janab. meri nacheez raey maiN to haqeeat per mabni baatoN ko ghazal ka mozu bana ker ham us ka daman kushada hi keraiN gay koi nuqsan to nahiN pohanchaeN gay.
Bohat bohat shukriya. Sher ki tAareef ka bhi meri taeed ka bahi. Zamaney ke saath sath Ghazal ka mizaj badalna fiTree si baat hai.
-----------------------------------
zubaaN pe aa gaya “Jawaid” she’r “Akbar” ka
saRak pe dekheeN jo be pardah laRkiyaaN maiN ne
bohat khub janab
Ek baar phir aap ka shukriya.
MuKhliS
Jawaid Badauni---------------------
wassalam
Sohail Malik
-
muhammad_19k
- -
- Posts: 540
- Joined: Wed Nov 22, 2006 8:36 am
- Location: Lahore
- Contact:
Salam Jawaid SaHeb,
doosri baar aap ki ghazal paRh rahaa thaa to eHsaas huwaa ke lafz "tifligi" kaafi qaabil e ghor hai. tifil se
tifli - y'ani bachgaana
tiflaana - y'ani bachgaana
tafoolat - y'ani bachpan
tafooliat - y'ani bachpan
to nazar se guzray haiN laikin ye tifligi ?
kaheeN ye waise hi bhool to naheeN jaise kayee dost Hairan se Hairani ke baj-aye Hairangi kar daitay haiN?
mukhliS,
Muhammad K. Siddiqui.
doosri baar aap ki ghazal paRh rahaa thaa to eHsaas huwaa ke lafz "tifligi" kaafi qaabil e ghor hai. tifil se
tifli - y'ani bachgaana
tiflaana - y'ani bachgaana
tafoolat - y'ani bachpan
tafooliat - y'ani bachpan
to nazar se guzray haiN laikin ye tifligi ?
kaheeN ye waise hi bhool to naheeN jaise kayee dost Hairan se Hairani ke baj-aye Hairangi kar daitay haiN?
mukhliS,
Muhammad K. Siddiqui.
Muhammad K. Siddiqui.
+92 321 4435273
938-C-Faisal Town, Lahore.
Pakistan.
+92 42 111516516
muhammad_19k@hotmail.com
+92 321 4435273
938-C-Faisal Town, Lahore.
Pakistan.
+92 42 111516516
muhammad_19k@hotmail.com
-
jawaid badauni
- -
- Posts: 810
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 5:38 am
- Contact:
muhammad_19k wrote:Salam Jawaid SaHeb,
doosri baar aap ki ghazal paRh rahaa thaa to eHsaas huwaa ke lafz "tifligi" kaafi qaabil e ghor hai. tifil se
tifli - y'ani bachgaana
tiflaana - y'ani bachgaana
tafoolat - y'ani bachpan
tafooliat - y'ani bachpan
to nazar se guzray haiN laikin ye tifligi ?
kaheeN ye waise hi bhool to naheeN jaise kayee dost Hairan se Hairani ke baj-aye Hairangi kar daitay haiN?
mukhliS,
Muhammad K. Siddiqui.
Lijiye maiN ne miSra badal diya hai. Kuch Ghalat alfaz is qadar kaSrat se bole jate haiN keh woh qubool.e Aaam ke zumrey meN aa gaye haiN. TafSeeli guftagoo kisee aur waqt hogee.
Shikriya.
Jawaid
-
Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar
- -
- Posts: 1258
- Joined: Sun Feb 12, 2006 1:40 pm
- Location: London, England
- Contact:
moHtaram Biraadaram Jawaid Badauni SaHib aadaab-o-tasleemaat!
Woh Gul ho tum jo GulistaaN kee jaan hotaa hai
samajh meN aaeY to woh she'er ho yaa jaan-e-GhaZal
tumahaaree yaad basatee hai sheher she'erooN keY
tumhareY naam se aabaad hai jahaan-e-GhaZal.
is tamheed ke ba'd maiN aap kee GhaZal kee janib aataa hooN. yeh t^areeq ke mushae'rh meN sab se qabl GhaZal pesh karnaa. aor masa'lah-e-taqdeem-o-takheer jo keh mushae'erooN meN a'aam t^aor par baru-e-kaar laaya jataa hai. agarcheh ab is kaa rawaaj bhee jane lagaa hai. aor sho'rah karaam ko apas meN yooN sheer-o-shakar ker ke pesh kiyaa jataa hai keh gaoyaa kohnah shae'ir Awwal Awwal kalaam sunaa dete haiN aor naomashq sukhanwar ikhtetaam par tashreef late haiN.......khaer aap kaa yeh wat^eerah qabil-e-sataae'ish hai. keh aek pukhtah kaar saal khurdah aor mushshaaQ honeY ke bawajood apne martabah aor maqaam ko naz^ar andaaZ karte huweY sab se pehleY asha'aar pesh farmaa dete haiN.
GuZarish#29 ke liye aap kee GhaZal agarcheh moHtaaj-e-taoSeef-o-ta'reef naheeN lekin use Sirf rasmee kheraaj-e-teHseen aor Sirf waah waah se laoTaaya naheeN jaa saktaa.
GhaZal kaa Qareeb Qareeb har she'er apne bayaan ke aa'tebaar se Husn-e-bayaan aor rangeenee-e-lisaan kee naZakatooN aor lat^afatooN ko choo rahaa hai. maiN samajhtaa hooN keh aap ke afkaar-o-naZariyaat ko Qareeb se dekhnaa aor un se istefaadah karnaa aap kee saadah bayaanee aor a'aam fehem usloob-e-she'er ne aasaan banaa kar rakh diyaa hai.
agar cheh is se qabl aap ne Haaliyah naZm jo raqim kee nazr kee hai us meN u'mdah-o-dilkash taraakeeb aor faarsee bandishooN ko baRe khubSyrat andaaZ meN istea'maal kar ke aap ne baRee kaamyaab koshish kee hai. is se pataa chaltaa hai keh aap sehl-e-mumtina' ke i'lawah mushkil maZ^ameen mushkil ZameenooN meN maahiranah andaaZ meN baandhne par bhee khaaSee girift rakhte haiN.
KhulooS baaNt ke apna yahaN wahaN maiN ne
banaa liya hai moHabbat ka kaarwaN maiN ne
kiyaa kehne! Waah!
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
Bohot khoob!
maiN ek rote huwey ko kabhi haNsa nah sakaa
“tamam umr guzaaree hai raigaaN maiN ne”
kiyaa kehne Waah Waah!
abhee talak haiN miri Tiflegi ki yaadoN meN
woh jo banayi theeN kaGhaz ki kashtiyaaN maiN ne
kiya kehne! Waah Waah!
jise talab ho woh Khud rasta talash kare
miTa diye haiN sabhee paaoN ke nishaN maiN ne
Waah jee Waah!
bahar aai hai gulshan meN maiN na manooNga
bohat qareeb se dekha hai gulsitaaN maiN ne
Waah Waah!
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
Bohot khoob! Kiyaa kehne!
zubaaN pe aa gaya “Jawaid” she’r “Akbar” ka
saRak pe dekheeN jo be pardah laRkiyaaN maiN ne
Waah Waah!kiyaa kehne! kiyaa Aaap kaa isharak Akbar Ilah Aabadi kee janib hai?
"maiN hooN Akbar Ilah Baadee maiN shae'ir hooN HaseenooN kaa"
meree Janib se is khubSurat koshish par dilee daad aor mubarak baad Qubool keejiye.
nek tamannaooN ke saath ijaZut chahooN gaa!
Wassalam
Muz^affar
Woh Gul ho tum jo GulistaaN kee jaan hotaa hai
samajh meN aaeY to woh she'er ho yaa jaan-e-GhaZal
tumahaaree yaad basatee hai sheher she'erooN keY
tumhareY naam se aabaad hai jahaan-e-GhaZal.
is tamheed ke ba'd maiN aap kee GhaZal kee janib aataa hooN. yeh t^areeq ke mushae'rh meN sab se qabl GhaZal pesh karnaa. aor masa'lah-e-taqdeem-o-takheer jo keh mushae'erooN meN a'aam t^aor par baru-e-kaar laaya jataa hai. agarcheh ab is kaa rawaaj bhee jane lagaa hai. aor sho'rah karaam ko apas meN yooN sheer-o-shakar ker ke pesh kiyaa jataa hai keh gaoyaa kohnah shae'ir Awwal Awwal kalaam sunaa dete haiN aor naomashq sukhanwar ikhtetaam par tashreef late haiN.......khaer aap kaa yeh wat^eerah qabil-e-sataae'ish hai. keh aek pukhtah kaar saal khurdah aor mushshaaQ honeY ke bawajood apne martabah aor maqaam ko naz^ar andaaZ karte huweY sab se pehleY asha'aar pesh farmaa dete haiN.
GuZarish#29 ke liye aap kee GhaZal agarcheh moHtaaj-e-taoSeef-o-ta'reef naheeN lekin use Sirf rasmee kheraaj-e-teHseen aor Sirf waah waah se laoTaaya naheeN jaa saktaa.
GhaZal kaa Qareeb Qareeb har she'er apne bayaan ke aa'tebaar se Husn-e-bayaan aor rangeenee-e-lisaan kee naZakatooN aor lat^afatooN ko choo rahaa hai. maiN samajhtaa hooN keh aap ke afkaar-o-naZariyaat ko Qareeb se dekhnaa aor un se istefaadah karnaa aap kee saadah bayaanee aor a'aam fehem usloob-e-she'er ne aasaan banaa kar rakh diyaa hai.
agar cheh is se qabl aap ne Haaliyah naZm jo raqim kee nazr kee hai us meN u'mdah-o-dilkash taraakeeb aor faarsee bandishooN ko baRe khubSyrat andaaZ meN istea'maal kar ke aap ne baRee kaamyaab koshish kee hai. is se pataa chaltaa hai keh aap sehl-e-mumtina' ke i'lawah mushkil maZ^ameen mushkil ZameenooN meN maahiranah andaaZ meN baandhne par bhee khaaSee girift rakhte haiN.
KhulooS baaNt ke apna yahaN wahaN maiN ne
banaa liya hai moHabbat ka kaarwaN maiN ne
kiyaa kehne! Waah!
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
Bohot khoob!
maiN ek rote huwey ko kabhi haNsa nah sakaa
“tamam umr guzaaree hai raigaaN maiN ne”
kiyaa kehne Waah Waah!
abhee talak haiN miri Tiflegi ki yaadoN meN
woh jo banayi theeN kaGhaz ki kashtiyaaN maiN ne
kiya kehne! Waah Waah!
jise talab ho woh Khud rasta talash kare
miTa diye haiN sabhee paaoN ke nishaN maiN ne
Waah jee Waah!
bahar aai hai gulshan meN maiN na manooNga
bohat qareeb se dekha hai gulsitaaN maiN ne
Waah Waah!
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
Bohot khoob! Kiyaa kehne!
zubaaN pe aa gaya “Jawaid” she’r “Akbar” ka
saRak pe dekheeN jo be pardah laRkiyaaN maiN ne
Waah Waah!kiyaa kehne! kiyaa Aaap kaa isharak Akbar Ilah Aabadi kee janib hai?
"maiN hooN Akbar Ilah Baadee maiN shae'ir hooN HaseenooN kaa"
meree Janib se is khubSurat koshish par dilee daad aor mubarak baad Qubool keejiye.
nek tamannaooN ke saath ijaZut chahooN gaa!
Wassalam
Muz^affar
-
jawaid badauni
- -
- Posts: 810
- Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2005 5:38 am
- Contact:
Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar wrote:moHtaram Biraadaram Jawaid Badauni SaHib aadaab-o-tasleemaat!
Woh Gul ho tum jo GulistaaN kee jaan hotaa hai
samajh meN aaeY to woh she'er ho yaa jaan-e-GhaZal
tumahaaree yaad basatee hai sheher she'erooN keY
tumhareY naam se aabaad hai jahaan-e-GhaZal.
is tamheed ke ba'd maiN aap kee GhaZal kee janib aataa hooN. yeh t^areeq ke mushae'rh meN sab se qabl GhaZal pesh karnaa. aor masa'lah-e-taqdeem-o-takheer jo keh mushae'erooN meN a'aam t^aor par baru-e-kaar laaya jataa hai. agarcheh ab is kaa rawaaj bhee jane lagaa hai. aor sho'rah karaam ko apas meN yooN sheer-o-shakar ker ke pesh kiyaa jataa hai keh gaoyaa kohnah shae'ir Awwal Awwal kalaam sunaa dete haiN aor naomashq sukhanwar ikhtetaam par tashreef late haiN.......khaer aap kaa yeh wat^eerah qabil-e-sataae'ish hai. keh aek pukhtah kaar saal khurdah aor mushshaaQ honeY ke bawajood apne martabah aor maqaam ko naz^ar andaaZ karte huweY sab se pehleY asha'aar pesh farmaa dete haiN.
GuZarish#29 ke liye aap kee GhaZal agarcheh moHtaaj-e-taoSeef-o-ta'reef naheeN lekin use Sirf rasmee kheraaj-e-teHseen aor Sirf waah waah se laoTaaya naheeN jaa saktaa.
GhaZal kaa Qareeb Qareeb har she'er apne bayaan ke aa'tebaar se Husn-e-bayaan aor rangeenee-e-lisaan kee naZakatooN aor lat^afatooN ko choo rahaa hai. maiN samajhtaa hooN keh aap ke afkaar-o-naZariyaat ko Qareeb se dekhnaa aor un se istefaadah karnaa aap kee saadah bayaanee aor a'aam fehem usloob-e-she'er ne aasaan banaa kar rakh diyaa hai.
agar cheh is se qabl aap ne Haaliyah naZm jo raqim kee nazr kee hai us meN u'mdah-o-dilkash taraakeeb aor faarsee bandishooN ko baRe khubSyrat andaaZ meN istea'maal kar ke aap ne baRee kaamyaab koshish kee hai. is se pataa chaltaa hai keh aap sehl-e-mumtina' ke i'lawah mushkil maZ^ameen mushkil ZameenooN meN maahiranah andaaZ meN baandhne par bhee khaaSee girift rakhte haiN.
KhulooS baaNt ke apna yahaN wahaN maiN ne
banaa liya hai moHabbat ka kaarwaN maiN ne
kiyaa kehne! Waah!
bohat nafees ameeroN ki bastiyaaN haiN magar
yahaN bhi dekhe haiN girte huuwe makaN maiN ne
Bohot khoob!
maiN ek rote huwey ko kabhi haNsa nah sakaa
“tamam umr guzaaree hai raigaaN maiN ne”
kiyaa kehne Waah Waah!
abhee talak haiN miri Tiflegi ki yaadoN meN
woh jo banayi theeN kaGhaz ki kashtiyaaN maiN ne
kiya kehne! Waah Waah!
jise talab ho woh Khud rasta talash kare
miTa diye haiN sabhee paaoN ke nishaN maiN ne
Waah jee Waah!
bahar aai hai gulshan meN maiN na manooNga
bohat qareeb se dekha hai gulsitaaN maiN ne
Waah Waah!
miri doa hai keh duniya meN koii jung nah ho
bilakti dekhi hai fauji ki ek maaN maiN ne
Bohot khoob! Kiyaa kehne!
zubaaN pe aa gaya “Jawaid” she’r “Akbar” ka
saRak pe dekheeN jo be pardah laRkiyaaN maiN ne
Waah Waah!kiyaa kehne! kiyaa Aaap kaa isharak Akbar Ilah Aabadi kee janib hai?
"maiN hooN Akbar Ilah Baadee maiN shae'ir hooN HaseenooN kaa"
meree Janib se is khubSurat koshish par dilee daad aor mubarak baad Qubool keejiye.
nek tamannaooN ke saath ijaZut chahooN gaa!
Wassalam
Muz^affar
[/b]
MaqTey meN meri murad mundarja zel she'r se thee:
poocha kisee ne aap ka pardah kidhar gaya
kahne lagiN keh aql pe mardoN ke paR gaya
Neez yeh keh aap ashAAr ki pazeeraayee ke liye jo tabsarah karte haiN woh bazaat.e Khud daad ka mustaHiq hota hai. MaiN yeh baat yaqeen se kah sakta hooN keh kum se kum NaSr meN muhe aap se seekhne ka mauqa mil raha hai. Shukriya.
Aapka MuKhliS
Jawaid