Badla nahi hai jaada e manzil tamaam umr
mahwer se kab hata hai mera dil tamaam umr
uljhaa raha hai zahir o batin ki jang mai
mai khud na ban sakaa mere qabil tamaam umr
ehsaan mujh pe kargayaa ban kar adoo mera
tha merey dostoN mai jo shamil tamaam umr
mai aks ban ke deeda o dil mai basaa rahaa
mujh se na bach sakaa mera qatil tamaam umr
thaa mujh ko bhi azeez bahut maslak e junooN
mahtaab un mai kam rahaa shamil tamaam umr
Mahtab Qadr
taza ghazal ke ashaar
Moderator: Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar
- Mahtab Qadr
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Re: taza ghazal ke ashaar
moHtaram janab-e-Mahtab Qadr SaaHeb
Aadaab-o-tasleemat,
bohat dinooN baa'ad aap ka kalam daikha acha laga.
Aadaab-o-tasleemat,
bohat dinooN baa'ad aap ka kalam daikha acha laga.
Mahtab Qadr wrote:Badla nahi hai jaada e manzil tamaam umr
mahwer se kab hata hai mera dil tamaam umr
wah matlah khoob hai.
uljhaa raha hai zahir o batin ki jang mai
mai khud na ban sakaa mere qabil tamaam umr
wah bohat hee umda she'r hai daad quboo keejiy
ehsaan mujh pe kargayaa ban kar adoo mera
tha merey dostoN mai jo shamil tamaam umr
bohat hee pyaara mazmoon hai har kee haqeeqat se qareeb tar.
mai aks ban ke deeda o dil mai basaa rahaa
mujh se na bach sakaa mera qatil tamaam umr
:) nice
thaa mujh ko bhi azeez bahut maslak e junooN
mahtaab un mai kam rahaa shamil tamaam umr
mqata bhi khoob hai.
iss kamyaab takhleeq par meree janib se dilee daad aur mubarak baad qubool keeiye.
Wassalam
Zahida Raees :Raji:
Meree sha'iree se mujhe jaan Lo
ke yeh aa'enaa hai meri zaat ka
(Raji)
ke yeh aa'enaa hai meri zaat ka
(Raji)
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Re: taza ghazal ke ashaar
Waah Sarfarazb sahabMahtab Qadr wrote:Badla nahi hai jaada e manzil tamaam umr
mahwer se kab hata hai mera dil tamaam umr
uljhaa raha hai zahir o batin ki jang mai
mai khud na ban sakaa mere qabil tamaam umr
ehsaan mujh pe kargayaa ban kar adoo mera
tha merey dostoN mai jo shamil tamaam umr
mai aks ban ke deeda o dil mai basaa rahaa
mujh se na bach sakaa mera qatil tamaam umr
thaa mujh ko bhi azeez bahut maslak e junooN
mahtaab un mai kam rahaa shamil tamaam umr
Mahtab Qadr
humne to humesha hi kaha haiy ke aap jab bhi karte hain kamal karte hain.
Humesha ki tarah aapka kalaam khoobsoorat aur zordaar haiy, veyse to ghazal ka har sheyr daad aur pasanddeedgi ke myaar pe poora utarta haiy, lekin phir bhi sheyr 2 aur 4 aur maqta bohot ziyada pasand ayaa.
jaazbaaton ki jang se fursat mil jaaye to zara hume bhi khabar den ke sab kheyriyet to haiy.
Safiya
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Re: taza ghazal ke ashaar
salaam sarfaraaz saaHib,
aapkii Ghazal nazar guzaar huii...masha Allah hamesha kii taraH aapkii yeh Ghazal bhii urfa o aalaa hai. aapkii GhazloN par tabsirah karna sooraj ko chaand dikhaane waalii baat huii. har she'r kia hii Khoob kahe haiN aapne. mubaarakbaad qubool kijiiye merii jaanib se.
yeh ash'aar bahot ziyaada pasand aaye nisbatan.
Hashmat
Badla nahi hai jaada e manzil tamaam umr
mahwer se kab hata hai mera dil tamaam umr
ehsaan mujh pe kar gayaa ban kar adoo mera
tha merey dostoN mai jo shamil tamaam umr
thaa mujh ko bhi azeez bahut maslak e junooN
mahtaab un mai kam rahaa shamil tamaam umr
aapkii Ghazal nazar guzaar huii...masha Allah hamesha kii taraH aapkii yeh Ghazal bhii urfa o aalaa hai. aapkii GhazloN par tabsirah karna sooraj ko chaand dikhaane waalii baat huii. har she'r kia hii Khoob kahe haiN aapne. mubaarakbaad qubool kijiiye merii jaanib se.
yeh ash'aar bahot ziyaada pasand aaye nisbatan.
Hashmat
Badla nahi hai jaada e manzil tamaam umr
mahwer se kab hata hai mera dil tamaam umr
ehsaan mujh pe kar gayaa ban kar adoo mera
tha merey dostoN mai jo shamil tamaam umr
thaa mujh ko bhi azeez bahut maslak e junooN
mahtaab un mai kam rahaa shamil tamaam umr