mohtaram shuja anwar ki gazal hazir hai .. choon ke unka
abhi a/c urdubandhan mein nahi khula hai lehaza unhone
apni kaawish mujhe post karne ke liye di hai ,, hazir hai .
apne khyalaat se aagaah karein ,, shuja anwar sahib ka ID
haI rehmanshuja@yahoo.co.in
shuja anwar ki gazal .tarhi misre pe
Moderator: Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar
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- Abdullah Nazir
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Bahut achchi ghazal hei aapki
MuHtaram
Shuja SaaHib,
PurkhulooS tasleemaat,
Aapki TaraHi ghazal bahut pasand aayi jiske liye dili daad aur mubaarakbaad pesh kartaa hooN.
TabSirah (jis se aapka muttafiq hounaa zaroori nahiN)
gum heiN talaash-e-rizq meiN itnaa safar meiN ham
mehmaan ban ke aate heiN khud apne ghar meiN ham
MaTlaA bahut achchaa hei.
khud apni khaamiyaoN ko chupaane ke waasTe
kiyuN naqS DhoonDte rahe shams o qamar meiN ham
yeh sheAr bhii achchaa hei.
us be-lagaam umr ki barbaadiyaaN nah pooch
tabdeel houke reh gaye jaise khanDar meiN ham.
Waah waah bahut achcha sheAr hei eHsaasat se bharpoor.
jis rehguzar pah chouR gayaa thaa koiee hameN
ab tak khaRe houe heiN usi rehguzar pah ham.
SheAr seedhaa saadah aur achchaa hei.
rusvaayiyaoN se kuch tou hameN faayidah houaa
rahte heiN her zabaan pah, her ik khabar meiN ham
Bahut khoob. "badnaam agar hounge tou kye naam nah hougaa.
taqseem yaa zarb ghaTaade ke jouRde
aane ke tou nahiN hei kisi din Sifar meiN ham
is sheAr meiN kuch ghalaTiyaaN heiN. Pahla miSraA bebaHr hei. Isko yooN kiyaa jaasaktaa hei (taqseem kar ke Zarb, ghaTaade keh jouRde).
Doosre miSreA ko bilkul badalnaa paRegaa kiyunkeh qaafiye ke lafz kaa talaffuz "Sifr" hei jo yahaaN munaasib nahiN housaktaa.
kyaa hougaa kyaa nah hougaa rah-e-ishq meiN ShujaaA
ghuT ghuT ke mar nah jaayeN isi aek Dar meiN ham.
MaqTaA bahut achchaa hei magar muHaaviah "isi aek Dar meiN" nahiN hei balke (isi aek Dar se) hounaa chaahiye jo radeef ke liHaaz se nahiN aasaktaa.
MajmooAi Taur per bahut hii achchi kaavish hei. Ummeed ke aayindah bhi aap apnaa kalaam bhejte rahenge. Shukriyah.
Aapkaa MukhliS,
Nazir.