Khumaar-e-baadah-e-Sad-soz-o-saaz kyaa jaaneN?

[Sarwar A. Raz]

yaaraan-e-bazm: aadaab-o-tasleemaat!

ek Ghazal pesh-e-Khidmat hai jo aaj hee huyee hai. shaayad kisee qaabil ho. apnee raaYe se nawaaz kar shukriyah kaa mauqa' i'naayat keejiYe. bal.k shukriyah peshagee hee HaaZ^ir hai! qubool farmaaiYe!

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:
============================
Ghazal:

Khumaar-e-baadah-e-Sad-soz-o-saaz kyaa jaaneN?
yeh naaz waale maqaam-e-niyaaz kyaa jaaneN?

inheN to apnee hee chaarah-garee naheeN aatee
miraa i'laaj mire chaarah-saaz kyaa jaaneN?

hameN yeh mai-kadah-e-a'ashiqee hee kaafee hai
ham aur koyee dar-e-kaarsaaz kyaa jaaneN?

nah in kee dostee achh`ee nah dushmanee achh`ee
Hisaab-e-dil bhalaa ahl-e-namaaz kyaa jaaneN?

jo apne dil pah guZartee hai kyaa kaheN in se?
sab ahl-e-dehr haiN, soz-o-gudaaz kyaa jaaneN?

azal se log jo naa-aashnaa-e-weHshat haiN
rah-e-wafaa ke nasheb-o-faraaz kyaa jaaneN?

woh lut^f-o-shauq jo Khud-aagahee se miltaa hai
farebKhurdah-e-Husn-e-majaaz kyaa jaaneN?

mile hai lut^f a'jab bandagee meN :Sarwar: ko
magar yeh aap se bandah-nawaaz kyaa jaaneN!

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

[Mahtab Qadr]

yaaraan-e-bazm: aadaab-o-tasleemaat!

ek Ghazal pesh-e-Khidmat hai jo aaj hee huyee hai. shaayad kisee qaabil ho. apnee raaYe se nawaaz kar shukriyah kaa mauqa' i'naayat keejiYe. bal.k shukriyah peshagee hee HaaZ^ir hai! qubool farmaaiYe!

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:
============================
Ghazal:

Khumaar-e-baadah-e-Sad-soz-o-saaz kyaa jaaneN?
yeh naaz waale maqaam-e-niyaaz kyaa jaaneN?

inheN to apnee hee chaarah-garee naheeN aatee
miraa i'laaj mire chaarah-saaz kyaa jaaneN?

hameN yeh mai-kadah-e-a'ashiqee hee kaafee hai
ham aur koyee dar-e-kaarsaaz kyaa jaaneN?

nah in kee dostee achh`ee nah dushmanee achh`ee
Hisaab-e-dil bhalaa ahl-e-namaaz kyaa jaaneN?

jo apne dil pah guZartee hai kyaa kaheN in se?
sab ahl-e-dehr haiN, soz-o-gudaaz kyaa jaaneN?

azal se log jo naa-aashnaa-e-weHshat haiN
rah-e-wafaa ke nasheb-o-faraaz kyaa jaaneN?

woh lut^f-o-shauq jo Khud-aagahee se miltaa hai
farebKhurdah-e-Husn-e-majaaz kyaa jaaneN?

mile hai lut^f a'jab bandagee meN :Sarwar: ko
magar yeh aap se bandah-nawaaz kyaa jaaneN!

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

Sarwar A.Raz Sahib ,tasleemat
Behad khushi huvi aapko dekh kar aur aapka kalam e balaghat nizam parhkar. sari ghazal hi aapki khoobsurat fikr e rasa ki raanaiyoN se saji huvi hai..
khas taur pe ye sher bahut dil ko lagay..

Khumaar-e-baadah-e-Sad-soz-o-saaz kyaa jaaneN?
yeh naaz waale maqaam-e-niyaaz kyaa jaaneN?

inheN to apnee hee chaarah-garee naheeN aatee
miraa i'laaj mire chaarah-saaz kyaa jaaneN?

woh lut^f-o-shauq jo Khud-aagahee se miltaa hai
farebKhurdah-e-Husn-e-majaaz kyaa jaaneN?

mile hai lut^f a'jab bandagee meN :Sarwar: ko
magar yeh aap se bandah-nawaaz kyaa jaaneN
Bahut nawazish itnaay umda ashaar se lutfandooz hone ka mauqa faraham farmaya aapne.

Albatta zail kesher mai ahl e namaaz se kaun murad haiN.wazahat farmaiN to zarranawazi.
nah in kee dostee achh`ee nah dushmanee achh`ee
Hisaab-e-dil bhalaa ahl-e-namaaz kyaa jaaneN?

khuloos kaish
MahtabQadr

[Abdullah Nazir]

Muhtarami
SARWAR A. RAZ :SARWAR: Saahib


Purkhuloos Tasleemaat o iHtiraam, :)


Ummeed ke mizaaj-e-giraami bakhair hounge.

Aapki ghazal hamaishah kii tarah bahut hii dilkash hei aur khoobsoorat izaafataoN aur maAani se murassaA. Yaqeenan mujh jaise Taalib-e-Ilm ke liye aisi niAmat gaahe maahe hii moyassar aati hei ke aik hii waqt meiN luTf andouz houne kaa bhii saamaan mohayya hou aur kuch seekh bhii sakuN.

Meri bharpoor daad aur mubaarakbaad Haazir hei.

Aik lafz ke baare meiN apne naakaarah zehn ke khatakne per maiN kuch souch meiN paRgayaa:

Aapka sheAr yooN hei:
(((inheN to apnee hee chaarah-garee naheeN aatee
miraa i'laaj mire chaarah-saaz kyaa jaaneN? )))

Is ne mujh se kahaa ke pahle misreA meiN lafz "hee" ke bajaaye agar "bhii" hou tou behtar hei. Lekin maiN ne isko khaamoush kardiya yeh kehkar ke ise rumooz-e-zabaan o baayaan se ab kyaa taAlluq baaqi rehgayaa hei. Shukriyah.


Aapkaa Mukhlis,

Nazir.

[Hashmat Usmani]

moHtaram janaab-e-Sarwar saaHib,

assalaamo 'alaikum

aapkii Ghazal nazarguzaar huii aur aajkaa din mere liye baai's-e-sad hazaar masarrat rahaa. ek hii din meN do behtareen GhazloN se lutf_andoz hone ko milaa...ek to aapkii Ghazal aur dusre janaab e Abid saaHib kii Ghazal. shukria aap donoN Hazraat ka ki aaj mera din lutf se bharpoor rahaa.

aapkii Ghazal se amiN hamesha hii muta'assir hotaa huuN aur kaii dinoN tak surroor dil_o_dimaaGh par Haawii rahtaa hai. maiN to pahroN gungunaayaa karta huN. aapkii ustaadaanah shaa'irii hotii hii is qaabil hai ki naazireen kii rooH mo'attar kar ho jaaye.

janaab-e-Sarfaraz saaHib ke ta'reefii kalimaat ke ba'd mere liye bachtaa haii kia hai sivaaye iske ki maiN bhi unkii sur se taal milauuN.

aapkaa bahot bahot shukria ki aapne hameN apne kalaam sunaane ke qaabil samjhaa.

har har she'r ek jam'e bayaan o Khayaalaat haiN. marHaba, subHaan Allah, masha Allah...

faqat naa_cheez,

hashmat

[Sarwar A. Raz]

mukarramee Mehtab Qadr SaaHeb: aadaab!

aap kee tavajjuh aur daad kaa shukriyah kin alfaaz^ meN adaa karooN! agar aap jaise suKhan-fehm himmat-afzaayee nah kareN to ham kis ke liYe she'r kaheN ge?

:ahl-e-namaaz: se aap naam-nihaad muttaqee, parhezgaar log leN to harj naheeN hai!

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

[Sarwar A. Raz]

mua'zzamee Nazir SaaHeb:aadaab!

Zikr meraa mujh` se behtar hai keh us meHfil meN hai!

yaad-aawaree ke liYe mamnoon hooN! us par mustazaad yeh keh aap ne meree naacheez Ghazal ko pasand farmaayaa! nawaazish, karam, shukriyah, mehrbaanee!

aap ne ek she'r ke Hawaaleh se ek tajveez i'naayat kee hai:

inheN to apnee hee chaarah-garee naheeN aatee
miraa i'laaj mire chaarah-saaz kyaa jaaneN?

aap ne likh`aa hai keh :hee: kee jagah :bh`ee: shaayad ziyaadah munaasib rahe gaa. aap kee yeh tajveez bohat ma'qool aur wazndaar hai. maiN is par sochooN gaa. is waqt meraa ta,accur yahee hai keh :hee: meN jo zor aur acar hai utnaa :bh`ee: meN meHsoos naheeN ho rahaa hai. lekin yeh ek shaKhSee ta,accur aur Khayaal hai aur is par mazeed Ghaur kiyaa jaa saktaa hai.

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

[Sarwar A. Raz]

muHibbee Hashmat SaaHeb:aadaab!

aap ne to Ghazal kee daad dene kee bajaaYe Khud nacr meN ek Ghazal keh dee! is andaaz meN paZeeraayee kee keh maiN sharmindah ho kar reh gayaa! yeh aap kee bandah-nawaazee aur muHabbat hai. maiN is ke liYe aap kaa dilee shukr-guZaar hooN!

aap Canada meN haiN aur woh bh`ee Ontario meN. wahaaN to mere kaafee karam-farmaa haiN. kyaa a'jab keh kuch`se aap waaqif bh`ee hoN. is kaa bh`ee imkaan hai keh kabh`ee aap se niyaaz HaaSil ho jaaYe. dua'a,oN meN yaad rakh`iYe. shukriyah!

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

[Mahtab Qadr]

mukarramee Mehtab Qadr SaaHeb: aadaab!

aap kee tavajjuh aur daad kaa shukriyah kin alfaaz^ meN adaa karooN! agar aap jaise suKhan-fehm himmat-afzaayee nah kareN to ham kis ke liYe she'r kaheN ge?

:ahl-e-namaaz: se aap naam-nihaad muttaqee, parhezgaar log leN to harj naheeN hai!

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

Huzoor e Aala , mai isko apni khushbakhti samajhta hoN ke aap ke kalam se sarfaraz horaha hoN. ye zarra nawaziaN mere lye bayes se sad iftekhar haiN.
Gustakhi ki muazirat ke sath arz hai ke, naam-nihaad hoN ya mukhlis , muttaqee aur parhezgar log hoN ya dunyadaar aur gunahgaar, namaz to sab musalmanoN par farz hai aur jo bhi namaz parhta hai zaher hai vo ahl e namaz ki tareef mai ayega. kahiN aisa to nahi ke aap ne ahle namaz kahkar nadanista taur par saray musalmanoN par choot ki ho. dobara apni is jasarat ke lye mazoori ka izhar karte huve arz karoNga ke aap is khoobsurat ghazal ko agar is sher ki tarteeb mai tabdeeli se nawaz deiN to bayes e etminaan hoga. kioNke ham sab apne tamam aqwal aur aamal ke lye jawabdah haiN.

Mukhlis
Mahtab Qadr

[Sarwar A. Raz]

mukarramee Mehtab SaaHeb:aadaab!

aap itnaa tarddud nah farmaaYeN. shaai'ree meN bohat kuch` kahaa jaataa hai aur us kaa kisee ke a'qeedah yaa a'mal se koyee ta,a'lluq naheeN hotaa hai!

too jo sar-ba-sajdah huwaa kabh`ee to zameeN se aane lagee Sadaa
tiraa dil to hai Sanam-aashnaa tujh`e kyaa mile gaa namaaz meN? (Iqbal)

ham ko ma'loom hai jannat kee Haqeeqat lekin
dil ke behlaane ko Ghalib yeh Khayaal achh`aa hai (Ghalib)

pakRe jaate haiN farishtoN ke likh`e par naaHaq
aadamee koyee hamaaraa dam-e-teHreer bh`ee th`aa? (Ghalib)

aise hee seNkRoN asha'ar aap ko mil jaaYeN ge. meree raaYe meN mujh` ko apnaa she`r badalne kee koyee Z^aroorat naheeN hai! aap kee tavajjuh aur muHabbat ke liYe shukriyah!

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

[jawaid badauni]

Mohtarmi Sarwar sahab, Aadab O Niyaz

Aapki ghazal mujh jaise tifle maktab ke liye mashAl-e raah hai. Meri janib se bahud daad.O.tahseen qubool farmiyega, halaNke mujhe iss baat ka ehsaas hai meri yeh daad, tahseen-e nashanas se ziyada kuch nahiN.

MaiN to kisee ghazal per khoole aam tabsare ke khilaf tha magar khood aap ne hukm nafis farmaya tha keh aise tabsaroN se gurez nahiN karna chahiye. Lihaza dou nacheez tajaweez lekar aapki khidmat meN hazir ho gaya hooN. Shayad yeh jasarat na karta magar Aligarh ke rishte se meri aap se qurbat ek fitri see baat hai.

Ek to Charasaaz wale she'r ke hawale se mujhe arz karna tha ke aapka she'r tibbi usooloN ke qatAn khilaaf hai. Duniya ka achche se achcha doctor ya hakeem khood apna ilaaj kabhi nahiN kar pata hai iss ke liye use doosroN ka hi sahara lena paRhta hai. To jise khood apni Charagari na aati ho zaroori nahiN woh doosroN ke ilaaj se bhi maAzoor ho. Agar aap ko meri baat meN kuch wazan nazar aata hai to iss per tawajjo farmaiyega warna ise nazar andaz kar deejiyga.

Ek aur nukte per bhi aapki tawajjo ka talib hooN. Aap ka ek misra: "Na inn kee dosti achchi na dushmani achchai" (yaqeenan ghair danista taur per) mere humwatan Shakil Budauni marhoom ki mash.hoor-e zamana ghazal ke ek Misre ke bahut qareeb aa gaya hai. (Woh ghazal iss liye bhi mash.hoor hoii thee kyoNke bAAd meN usne filmi gane ki shakl ikhtiyaar kar lee thee.) Shakil Sahab ka sher jahaN tak mujhe yaad hai kuch yooN tha:

Gharaz ka yaar hai matlab ka too hai shaidayee
Na teri dosti achchi na dushmani achchi

Gustakhi ke liye ma'azrat khwah hooN.

Apne kalam-e balaghat nizam per ek baar phir meri dili mubarakbaad qubool farmaiyega.

Khairtalab,

Jawaid Badauni
Muscat - Oman

[naheedv]

Respected janaab Sarwar saahab,
taslimaat!

buhat din ke ba'd aap kaa kalaam nazar se guzraa aur aik baar paRhne ke ba'd phir kaafi martabah paRhnaa paRaa kiyoN ke itnee gehree aur bhar.poor ghazal aik baar paRhne se samajhnaa mushkil thaa.
iss ghazal kaa her she'r buhat hee gehraa'ee meiN jaa kar utartaa hai aur vaaqa'ee ye aik umr kee reyaazat kaa hee natijah ho saktaa hai.

she'r no. 2, 5 zeyaadah pasaNd aa'e.
jahaaN par she'r no. 4 mujh jaisi kam.fehm samajhne se qaasir rahi, voheen par mujhe she'r 4 aur maqta' aik dusre kee zidd mehsoos huve.

ghazal par dili daad paish e khidmat hai.

taalib e duaa
Naheed

[Mahtab Qadr]

mukarramee Mehtab SaaHeb:aadaab!

aap itnaa tarddud nah farmaaYeN. shaai'ree meN bohat kuch` kahaa jaataa hai aur us kaa kisee ke a'qeedah yaa a'mal se koyee ta,a'lluq naheeN hotaa hai!

too jo sar-ba-sajdah huwaa kabh`ee to zameeN se aane lagee Sadaa
tiraa dil to hai Sanam-aashnaa tujh`e kyaa mile gaa namaaz meN? (Iqbal)

ham ko ma'loom hai jannat kee Haqeeqat lekin
dil ke behlaane ko Ghalib yeh Khayaal achh`aa hai (Ghalib)

pakRe jaate haiN farishtoN ke likh`e par naaHaq
aadamee koyee hamaaraa dam-e-teHreer bh`ee th`aa? (Ghalib)

aise hee seNkRoN asha'ar aap ko mil jaaYeN ge. meree raaYe meN mujh` ko apnaa she`r badalne kee koyee Z^aroorat naheeN hai! aap kee tavajjuh aur muHabbat ke liYe shukriyah!

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

Mohatram ul muqaam sarwar sahib , baad e tasleemat
Allama Iqbal ke is sher ka mafhoom unlogoN par choot kar raha hai jo, dil mai hazaroN but bitahaye rakhteh haiN aur dil ko us se khali kiye baghair Allah ke huzoor sajda raiz ho jate haiN , halaNke Allah hi sirf ibadat ke layeq hai. Allama ne yahaN sajdoN ka ya namaz ka inkar ya tauheen nahi ki hai balke namaz ke muqam ko kamal e bandagi samajhte huve ye farmaya ke pahle apna dil un khudaoN se paak karlo jinka yaqeen tum ne apne dil mai paida kia huva hai phir agar sajda karoge to bandagi ka lutf aayeg.

too jo sar-ba-sajdah huwaa kabh`ee to zameeN se aane lagee Sadaa
tiraa dil to hai Sanam-aashnaa tujh`e kyaa mile gaa namaaz meN? (Iqbal)

Ghalib ke ye donoN sheroN ka lahja gustakhana hai, jannat ki haqeeqat kia hai ye har musalman samajhta hai, jannat koi alif lalai dastan ka farzi kirdaar nahi na hi koi afsaana hai, islye ghaleb ke kahne se jannat ki haqeeqat badal nahi sakti ke ye kisi maulwi ya wayez ka aik khoobsurat takhayul nahi , choNke ye ghalib ka khyal hai lihaza sahi hoga aisa bhi nahi ke Ghalib aik shayer balke bahut barhe shayer zaroor the laikin unkay irshaadat mazhab se takra jaiN to phir unki haisiat bilkul sifr rah jati hai.

ham ko ma'loom hai jannat kee Haqeeqat lekin
dil ke behlaane ko Ghalib yeh Khayaal achh`aa hai (Ghalib)

pakRe jaate haiN farishtoN ke likh`e par naaHaq
aadamee koyee hamaaraa dam-e-teHreer bh`ee th`aa? (Ghalib)

haN iska bhi jawab Quran ne dia hai , jab aadmi hisab ke din ye kahega ke ghalib ki tarah ke farishton se jo kuch likha vo sahi nahihai to, phir farishtoN ke likhe daftar aik taraf kardiye jaiNge aur us aadmi ke aaza se poocha jaiga, aaza gawahi deiNge. aapne bhi shayed ye mazmoon hadeesoN mai parha ho.

Mohatram ustaad aali muqaam aapki ilmi haisiatoN ke poore aiteraaf ke sath ye banda e nacheeez ye arz karna chahta hai ke khudara Deen aur mazhab ko apni shayeri mai kisi bhi qisamki tanqeed o nook jhonk ka nasahana na banaya jaye. apni is be adab aur gustakhana tahreer par muaziratkhaw hoN ke is masale mai kisi se compromise nahi karsakta .
Mahtab Qadr

[Sarwar A. Raz]

mukarramee Mehtab SaaHeb:aadaab!

aap ke Khut^oot^ ko paRh kar maiN is nateejah par poNhchaa hooN keh ham donoN alag alag :wave lengths: par haiN aur :ijtimaa'-e-Z^iddain: kee koyee ummeed naheeN hai. aap ne jo kuch` kahaa hai woh aap kee taaweelaat ke nateejeh meN SaHeeH ho gaa aur mujh` ko in se koyee pareshaanee naheeN hai. aap ko mukammal iKhtiyaar hai keh aap apne mauqif par qaa,im raheN aur mujh` ko apne mauqif kaa Haq hai.

afsos keh maiN aap kee raaYe par a'mal naheeN kar saktaa hooN kyoN.k mere nazdeek us meN koyee wazn naheeN hai. gustaaKhee mua'af! in Haalaat meN behtar yehee hotaa hai keh beHc ko Khatm kar diyaa jaaYe. aap chaaheN to likh`eN. lekin mujh` ko is besood beHc se aa,indah ma'Zoor samajh`iYe: aur bh`ee Gham haiN zamaane meN muHabbat ke siwaa!

Khudaa-raa yeh nah samajh`iYe gaa keh maiN Khafaa hooN! aisee koyee baat naheeN hai. Allah aap ko Khush rakh`e.

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

[Sarwar A. Raz]

Naheed SaaHebah: salaam-e-shauq!

Khat^ aur daad donoN ke liYe mamnoon hooN. aap itnee ta'reef nah karteeN to maiN itnaa sharmindah bh`ee nah hotaa! Khush rahiYe.

she'r #4 aur maqt^e' ke taZ^aad kee baat maiN naheeN samajh` sakaa. agar kuch` waZ^aaHat kar deteeN to behtar hotaa.

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:

[Sarwar A. Raz]

muHibbee Jawaid SaaHeb:aadaab!

Khat^ kaa shukriyah. tanqeed kaa Haq sab ko baraabar kaa hai aur yeh koyee aap se ch`eeN naheeN saktaa hai! aap jab chaahe sanjeedah aur ta'meeree tanqeed keejiYe:

teer par teer chalaa,o tumheN Dar kis kaa hai
dil yeh kis kaa hai miree jaan, jigar kis kaa hai? :D

aap ne do baateN likh`ee haiN. muKhtaSar jawaab HaaZ^ir haiN:

(1) bhaayee aap kahaaN shaai'ree aur medical science ke chakkar meN phaNs gaYe? bh`alaa in kaa kyaa joR? agar aap yeh sab kareN ge to Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics, Surveying ke bh`ee uSool shaai'ree se Takkar lete naz^ar aaYeN ge! shaai'ree ko shaai'ree hee rehne deN. science nah banaaYeN to meree aur aap donoN kee a'afiyat hai!

(2) aap ne jo mere miSre' aur Shakeel Badaayoonee ke she'r meN mumaacilat dikh`aayee hai to woh koyee Hairat kee baat naheeN hai aur nah hee koyee e'tiraaZ^ kaa maqaam hai. aisaa hotaa hai aur akcar hotaa hai. isee meHfil meN maiN ne shaai'roN ke darmiyaan is qism kee mumaacilat par ek maZ^moon pesh kiyaa th`aa. us ko archives se nikaal kar dekh` leN to aap kee tashaffee ho jaaYe gee.

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar: