Salaam ahl-e-bazm...URDUSTAN pe Guzaarish#43 ke tehet NAZIR bhai ke diye gaye misre pe kuch likhne ki koshish ki hai...I hope maine radeef ko sahi se baandhaa hai...agar koi ghalti hui to plz mujhe zaroor bataaiyega...Shukriya :)
dheere dheere nazar se giraane lage
'Aap bhi mujh pe tohmat lagaane lage'
kaun si baat hai jo chupaane lage?
aap kyoN hum se nazreiN churaane lage?!
is tarah woh humeiN to jalaane lage
Ghair ki bazm meiN aane jaane lage!
jab se khaaboN meiN hum ghar basaane lage
log aa aa ke hum ko jagaane lage
zindagii meiN ajab daur aane lage
hum raqeeboN se milne milaane lage!
haath mere ye kaise khazaane lage?!
log kyoN cheena jhapTi machaane lage?!
jab se karne lage unki taareef hum
nit naye pairahan mein woh aane lage
aap ke aane se gham ke baadal chaTe
chaand,taare sabhii muskuraane lage! :-D
hum ne ye kab kahaa deejiye hum ko jaaN?!
khwaamakhwaah aap baateiN banaane lage!
jab bhi chaahaa ke unse kaheiN haal-e-dil
muuh phiraa ke woh mehfil se jaane lage! :x
aalam-e-yaas ne jab bhi gheraa humeiN
aas ki jyot hum to jalaane lage!
Aap ki aara ki muntazir,
Shumaila
Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai
Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
aapkii Ghazal nazar navaaz huii aur paRh kar bahot lutf aayaa. saada alfaaz meN dil kii baat kah jaanaa to bas koii aap se seekhe. bahot Khoob. she'roN meN ravaanii hai, puKhtagii-e-Khayaal hai, Husn-e-bayaan ke saath saath alfaaz aur ma'aanii ka Haseen sangam hai. Allah kare zor e qalam aur bhii ziyaada.
mujhe go ki tamaam ash'aar hii pasand aaye magar aapke chand ash'aar kii nishaan dehii karne kii jasaarat kar rahaa huuN:
kaun si baat hai jo chupaane lage?
aap kyoN hum se nazreiN churaane lage?!
waah...marHaba...kia baat dar_parda kah Daalii...subHaan Allah
is tarah woh humeiN to jalaane lage
Ghair ki bazm meiN aane jaane lage!
waah shummu waah...zara us bazm ka URL to dena...maiN unkii Khabar le luuNga ... fikar NOT
jab se khaaboN meiN hum ghar basaane lage
log aa aa ke hum ko jagaane lage
is she'r par mera deevaan Haazir hai [agar hota to hii na!] iimaan se dil Khush kar diyaa... :-D
jab se karne lage unki taareef hum
nit naye pairahan mein woh aane lage
yeh bhii Khoob raha goyaa HIPPIYON ka daur aa gayaa...kia VO kabhii sherwaanii meN bhii nazar aaye...she'r achchhaa hai aur lafz e pairaahan ka achchha ist'emaal kiya hai.
aap ke aane se gham ke baadal chaTe
chaand,taare sabhii muskuraane lage! :-D
aane se uske aaye bahaar...jaane se uske jaaye bahaar
ab yuN bhii kaha jaa saktaa hai ki:
aane se unke muskaayeN chaand...aane se unke haNseN sitaare...lolz
hum ne ye kab kahaa deejiye hum ko jaaN?!
khwaamakhwaah aap baateiN banaane lage!
yeh huii na baat...haN bilaa vajah hii gale paR gaye...haN! vaise yeh dialogue to shaadii ke ba'd sunne ko miltya hai
bahot Khoob Shummu...ek kaamiiyaab Ghazal par DheroN mubaarak_baad gar qubool uftaad.
shummu wrote:Salaam ahl-e-bazm...Guzaarish#43 ke tehet diye gaye misre pe kuch likhne ki koshish ki hai...I hope maine radeef ko sahi se baandhaa hai...agar koi ghalti hui to plz mujhe zaroor bataaiyega...Shukriya :)
dheere dheere nazar se giraane lage
'Aap bhi mujh pe tohmat lagaane lage'
fikr not, unheen kaa nuqsaan hai :)
kaun si baat hai jo chupaane lage?
aap kyoN hum se nazreiN churaane lage?!
ya'nee "chor kee daRhee meiN tinkaa" :)
is tarah woh humeiN to jalaane lage
Ghair ki bazm meiN aane jaane lage!
arey naheeN ba'ee, voh jalaa thoRee rahe heiN, voh tau aap ko aazmaa rahe heiN ;)
jab se khaaboN meiN hum ghar basaane lage
log aa aa ke hum ko jagaane lage
tumhaaraa matlab "zaailm samaaj" :)
zindagii meiN ajab daur aane lage
hum raqeeboN se milne milaane lage!
bas bayee, ziNdagee meiN buhat kuch naa.chaahate huve bhee karnaa paRtaa hai, tum dil choTaa mat karo :)
haath mere ye kaise khazaane lage?!
log kyoN cheena jhapTi machaane lage?! 8O
jab line ghaTne lage tau bataanaa, "hum bhee line meiN aa jaa'eN ge" ;)
jab se karne lage unki taareef hum
nit naye pairahan mein woh aane lage
achaa hai isee tarah un ke kapRon ko havaa bhee lag ga'ee ho gee ;)
aap ke aane se gham ke baadal chaTe
chaand,taare sabhii muskuraane lage! :D
waah, lagtaa hai koee habs kaa mosam thaa jo ch`aT gyaa :)
hum ne ye kab kahaa deejiye hum ko jaaN?!
khwaamakhwaah aap baateiN banaane lage!
ya'nee "aNgoor kh`aTe heiN" :)
jab bhi chaahaa ke unse kaheiN haal-e-dil
muuh phiraa ke woh mehfil se jaane lage! :x
kam.zaraf log aisaa hi karte heiN :)
aalam-e-yaas ne jab bhi gheraa humeiN
aas ki jyot hum to jalaane lage! :D
good sipirit, keep it up :)
Aap ki aara ki muntazir,
Shumaila
Shumaila,
aaj 2 din ke ba'd forum par aanaa huvaa tau aap kee ye khobsoorat ghazal paRhne ko milee,
waaah, waaah ,
kyaa khoob be.laag ghazal irshaad kee hai.
mashaa'Allah aap tau matlo'N kee line hee khaRee kar deteeN heiN, koee khyaal kisee aur ke liye bhee choR diya karo ;)
mazaq bar.taraf, mujhe tumhaaree ye saadah aur shokh byaanee ke andaazd meiN kahee ga'ee ghazal buhat pasaNd aa'ee,
aur isey paRhte huve maiN apnee shokh.byaani kee rag par qaaboo na rakh sakee aur chaNd jule likh diye, ummeed karti hooN tum buraa naheeN maano gee :)
ab tau buhat ach`aa likhne lagee ho, allah kare zor-e-qalam aur zeyaadah!
aapkii Ghazal nazar navaaz huii aur paRh kar bahot lutf aayaa. saada alfaaz meN dil kii baat kah jaanaa to bas koii aap se seekhe. bahot Khoob. she'roN meN ravaanii hai, puKhtagii-e-Khayaal hai, Husn-e-bayaan ke saath saath alfaaz aur ma'aanii ka Haseen sangam hai. Allah kare zor e qalam aur bhii ziyaada.
ufffffffffffffff itni taareef ....Allah main kahin khushi se mar na jaoon lolz bahut shukriya zarra nawaazi ka... :-D
mujhe go ki tamaam ash'aar hii pasand aaye magar aapke chand ash'aar kii nishaan dehii karne kii jasaarat kar rahaa huuN:
jee jee zaroor ...go ahead! 8)
kaun si baat hai jo chupaane lage?
aap kyoN hum se nazreiN churaane lage?!
waah...marHaba...kia baat dar_parda kah Daalii...subHaan Allah
--ADAAB ARZ HAI
is tarah woh humeiN to jalaane lage
Ghair ki bazm meiN aane jaane lage!
waah shummu waah...zara us bazm ka URL to dena...maiN unkii Khabar le luuNga ... fikar NOT
[color=Dark blue]---ha ha ye URL waali bazm nahi..asli walai hai [/color]
jab se khaaboN meiN hum ghar basaane lage
log aa aa ke hum ko jagaane lage
is she'r par mera deevaan Haazir hai [agar hota to hii na!] iimaan se dil Khush kar diyaa... :-D
really?????????? wow isse baDi daad kya ho sakti hai mere liye...mujhe to laga ye sher kisi ko pasand nahi aayega .....
jab se karne lage unki taareef hum
nit naye pairahan mein woh aane lage
yeh bhii Khoob raha goyaa HIPPIYON ka daur aa gayaa...kia VO kabhii sherwaanii meN bhii nazar aaye...she'r achchhaa hai aur lafz e pairaahan ka achchha ist'emaal kiya hai.
--nawaazish ,karam..shukriya :-D
aap ke aane se gham ke baadal chaTe
chaand,taare sabhii muskuraane lage! :-D
aane se uske aaye bahaar...jaane se uske jaaye bahaar
jee jee lolz
ab yuN bhii kaha jaa saktaa hai ki:
aane se unke muskaayeN chaand...aane se unke haNseN sitaare...lolz
hum ne ye kab kahaa deejiye hum ko jaaN?!
khwaamakhwaah aap baateiN banaane lage!
yeh huii na baat...haN bilaa vajah hii gale paR gaye...haN! vaise yeh dialogue to shaadii ke ba'd sunne ko miltya hai
ab sachchaii to na ugalwaayeiN
bahot Khoob Shummu...ek kaamiiyaab Ghazal par DheroN mubaarak_baad gar qubool uftaad.
Hashmat
Maine jis jis bamz meiN ye ghazal post ki..waAllah logon ne dil khol ke saraaha ..shayad isliye bhi ke bahut halki phulki si thi...sab hanste rahe mera kalam paRhke lolz... mujhe aap ke bhi comments parhke bahuuuuuuuuuut achcha laga...enjoyed it....Thanx a lot for the daad and tehseen lolz :mrgreen:
Shumaila
Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai
Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
shummu wrote:Salaam ahl-e-bazm...Guzaarish#43 ke tehet diye gaye misre pe kuch likhne ki koshish ki hai...I hope maine radeef ko sahi se baandhaa hai...agar koi ghalti hui to plz mujhe zaroor bataaiyega...Shukriya :)
dheere dheere nazar se giraane lage
'Aap bhi mujh pe tohmat lagaane lage'
fikr not, unheen kaa nuqsaan hai :)
lolz
kaun si baat hai jo chupaane lage?
aap kyoN hum se nazreiN churaane lage?!
ya'nee "chor kee daRhee meiN tinkaa" :)
bilkul
is tarah woh humeiN to jalaane lage
Ghair ki bazm meiN aane jaane lage!
arey naheeN ba'ee, voh jalaa thoRee rahe heiN, voh tau aap ko aazmaa rahe heiN ;)
achcha lolz lekin unki is harkat se hum jal ke raakh ho jaate haina..uska kya kiya jaaye
jab se khaaboN meiN hum ghar basaane lage
log aa aa ke hum ko jagaane lage
tumhaaraa matlab "zaailm samaaj" :)
han na ...wahan bhi chain se rehne nahi dete
zindagii meiN ajab daur aane lage
hum raqeeboN se milne milaane lage!
bas bayee, ziNdagee meiN buhat kuch naa.chaahate huve bhee karnaa paRtaa hai, tum dil choTaa mat karo :)
dilaasa dene ka shukriya
haath mere ye kaise khazaane lage?!
log kyoN cheena jhapTi machaane lage?! 8O
jab line ghaTne lage tau bataanaa, "hum bhee line meiN aa jaa'eN ge" ;)
aap bhi..hadh hai lolz
jab se karne lage unki taareef hum
nit naye pairahan mein woh aane lage
achaa hai isee tarah un ke kapRon ko havaa bhee lag ga'ee ho gee ;)
well said!
aap ke aane se gham ke baadal chaTe
chaand,taare sabhii muskuraane lage! :D
waah, lagtaa hai koee habs kaa mosam thaa jo ch`aT gyaa :)
han na...unki judaii mein habs ka hi mausam tha na ..samjhaa kareiN
hum ne ye kab kahaa deejiye hum ko jaaN?!
khwaamakhwaah aap baateiN banaane lage!
ya'nee "aNgoor kh`aTe heiN" :)
LOL
jab bhi chaahaa ke unse kaheiN haal-e-dil
muuh phiraa ke woh mehfil se jaane lage! :x
kam.zaraf log aisaa hi karte heiN :)
sahi kaha!
aalam-e-yaas ne jab bhi gheraa humeiN
aas ki jyot hum to jalaane lage! :D
good sipirit, keep it up :)
THANX :D
Aap ki aara ki muntazir,
Shumaila
Shumaila,
aaj 2 din ke ba'd forum par aanaa huvaa tau aap kee ye khobsoorat ghazal paRhne ko milee,
waaah, waaah ,
kyaa khoob be.laag ghazal irshaad kee hai.
mashaa'Allah aap tau matlo'N kee line hee khaRee kar deteeN heiN, koee khyaal kisee aur ke liye bhee choR diya karo ;)
mazaq bar.taraf, mujhe tumhaaree ye saadah aur shokh byaanee ke andaazd meiN kahee ga'ee ghazal buhat pasaNd aa'ee,
aur isey paRhte huve maiN apnee shokh.byaani kee rag par qaaboo na rakh sakee aur chaNd jule likh diye, ummeed karti hooN tum buraa naheeN maano gee :)
ab tau buhat ach`aa likhne lagee ho, allah kare zor-e-qalam aur zeyaadah!
mukhliS
Naheed
arey ye sab aap logon ki hausla afzaii ka nateeja hai warna main kis qaabil :D mujheeeeee bahut khushi hui ke aap ko mera kalaam is darjaa pasand aaya....har sher pe fardna fardan comments dene ka shukriya...i was laughing after reading ur comments..maine halki phulki hi ghazal likhi thi aur usi tarah ke halke phulke comments bhi expect karti hoon isliye buraa maanne ka sawaal hi paida nahi hota..I really enjoyed it!Shukriya bahut bahut NAHEED sis :rose
Shumaila
Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai
Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
aap ke aane se gham ke baadal chaTe
chaand,taare sabhii muskuraane lage!
Waah waah, bahut hii khoob. Aap tou bahut hii achche ashAaar kehne lagi heiN. Mubarakbaad.
hum ne ye kab kahaa deejiye hum ko jaaN?!
khwaamakhwaah aap baateiN banaane lage!
Yeh sheAr bhii Theek hei.
jab bhi chaahaa ke unse kaheiN haal-e-dil
muuh phiraa ke woh mehfil se jaane lage!
Waah wah kiyaa taghazzul hei is sheAr meiN. Bahut hii khoob. Albattah agar muHaavirah "muNh phair ke" aasaktaa tou behtar houtaa.
aalam-e-yaas ne jab bhi gheraa humeiN
aas ki jyot hum to jalaane lage!
Bahut achchaa sheAr hei.
Mujhe aapki yeh ghazal behad pasand aayi, jiske liye meri daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye.
Aakhir meiN, aek kaam kii baat bataataa hooN. Aap hamaishah yeh koushish kareN ke aise alfaaz jaise "tou", "phir", "maiN", "too" "tum", waghairah kam se kam isteAmaal karne kii koushish kareN aur us jagah jahaN unke nah houne se sheAr ka mafhoom adaa nah housake.
Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.[/i]
Wow Nazir bhai.....aap ne to har sher pe alag se daad di...mujhe itni khushi hoti hai aap ki jaanib se daad paa kar ....bahut bahut shukriya poori ki poori ghazal ko dil khol ke saraahne ka..aap ne jo baateiN kahin inshaAllah un pe bhi ghaur karungi..aayenda koshish karungi magar woh kehte haina...dheere dheer hi insaan seekhta hai ummeed hai aayenda bhi hausla afzaii farmaate rahenge!
Shumaila
Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai
Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
wah bhai wah! kya khoob ashaar likhe hain aap. bohat khoob!
dhair saari daad aur mubarakbaad qubool keejiye.
sara.
Mukhtasir hi sahi magar aap ki jaanib se daad paa ke bahuuuuuuuuuut khushi hui...thank u so much dear Sara jee...ho sake to meri woh ghazal bhi zaroor dekhiyega jo haal hi mein post ki thi "mukhtasir zindagi na ho jaaye" Thanx for daad and mubarak baad
take care..!
Shumaila
Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai
Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
Mohtarma "Shumaila" aap ki ghazal buhat pasand aayee. Buhat hi saada aur dilkash andaz-e-bayan hai saray hi ashaar buhat umdah hain magar mujhay zaati taur par shair no.4 & 5 ziyada pasand aayay.
Anis Hasan wrote:Mohtarma "Shumaila" aap ki ghazal buhat pasand aayee. Buhat hi saada aur dilkash andaz-e-bayan hai saray hi ashaar buhat umdah hain magar mujhay zaati taur par shair no.4 & 5 ziyada pasand aayay.
Mohtaram "Anis" sahab..bahut bahut shukriya ghazla ko pasand karne ka aur daad se nawaazne ka
Shumaila
Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai
Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
quote="shummu"]Salaam ahl-e-bazm...URDUSTAN pe Guzaarish#43 ke tehet diye gaye misre pe kuch likhne ki koshish ki hai...I hope maine radeef ko sahi se baandhaa hai...agar koi ghalti hui to plz mujhe zaroor bataaiyega...Shukriya :)
walikam salaam shu.
kesi ho. is "taraaii misrey" per tumhaarii gazal dekh ker achaa lagaa
dheere dheere nazar se giraane lage
'Aap bhi mujh pe tohmat lagaane lage'
waah bohat khub. yeh sher behad pasand aayaa
kaun si baat hai jo chupaane lage?
aap kyoN hum se nazreiN churaane lage?!
bohat khub ki. daad qubool karo
is tarah woh humeiN to jalaane lage
Ghair ki bazm meiN aane jaane lage!
very bad esaa nahin kertey.
jab se khaaboN meiN hum ghar basaane lage
log aa aa ke hum ko jagaane lage
shummu wrote:Salaam ahl-e-bazm...URDUSTAN pe Guzaarish#43 ke tehet diye gaye misre pe kuch likhne ki koshish ki hai...I hope maine radeef ko sahi se baandhaa hai...agar koi ghalti hui to plz mujhe zaroor bataaiyega...Shukriya :)
walikam salaam shu.
kesi ho. is "taraaii misrey" per tumhaarii gazal dekh ker achaa lagaa
dheere dheere nazar se giraane lage
'Aap bhi mujh pe tohmat lagaane lage'
waah bohat khub. yeh sher behad pasand aayaa
kaun si baat hai jo chupaane lage?
aap kyoN hum se nazreiN churaane lage?!
bohat khub ki. daad qubool karo
is tarah woh humeiN to jalaane lage
Ghair ki bazm meiN aane jaane lage!
very bad esaa nahin kertey.
jab se khaaboN meiN hum ghar basaane lage
log aa aa ke hum ko jagaane lage
hum ne ye kab kahaa deejiye hum ko jaaN?!
khwaamakhwaah aap baateiN banaane lage!
lo ker lo baat ;)
jab bhi chaahaa ke unse kaheiN haal-e-dil
muuh phiraa ke woh mehfil se jaane lage!
bohat galat baat hey bhala esey bhii koii kertaa hey
aalam-e-yaas ne jab bhi gheraa humeiN
aas ki jyot hum to jalaane lage! :)
bohat khub shu.
purii gazal hi bohat achi lagii.
dilli daad qubool karo. :)
ab to main hi soch rahi hun is per kuch likh daalun
shukriya
Aap ki aara ki muntazir,
Shumaila
w'salaam ...thank u sooooooo much FATIMA..ek ek karke har sher pe daad di tumne aur saath pyaare pyaare comments diye...main tumhari mamnoon hoon!waise tumne bhi khoob ghazal kahi hai is misre pe.... :)
Shumaila
Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai
Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
ufffffffffffffff itni taareef ....Allah main kahin khushi se mar na jaoon lolz 
ummeed hai aayenda bhi hausla afzaii farmaate rahenge!