ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

[fatimah]

aslaam_u_alikam

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

[khurram_shaikh]

aslaam_u_alikam

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

W salam,



woooooooow kyaa baat hai bahooot hi zabardast aur ghazeb ki kavish likhi tumnien chhoooti waise to poori ghazal hi zabardast hai lekin mujhe chand ashaar behud pasand aaye dili daad qabool karo khush raho

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

kya kehnien


ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

aur yeh misraa to humien dil mien chubh gayaa teer ki tareh

[Safiya]

aslaam_u_alikam

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

Salaam Fatima

Ye aapki doosri ghazal paDi haiy, aur kehna paDta haiy, waah bohot khoob likhtin hain aap, ghazal me kamaal ki rawaangi haiy. saare hi ashaar bohot pasand aaye, yun lagha jeyse aap humare dil ki baat kar rahin hain. Allah kare zor-e-kalaam aur ziyada.

Safiya

[Ibn-e-siddique]

fatima saHiba:

salaam arz hai

aap ki ye ghazal pehle bhi paRhi aur bahot pasand aayee. aap ke kalaam mein roz.ba.roz nikhaar aata jaa rahaa hai.

is umda kawish per daad aur mubarak.baad qubool kijiye

amjad

[Hashmat Usmani]

salaam fatima,

kaisi ahiN? aapkii Gahzal nazar guzaar huii aur baa'is-e-lutf huii. bahot achchhi Ghazal kahii hai aapne. ash'aar ke mazaameen qaabil-e-sataaish haiN. zabaan kii bandish chust hai magar is par thoRii bahot mazeed behtarii kii jaa saktii hai. ab tak kii aapkii GhazloN meN mujhe yeh Ghazal sab se ziyaada achchhi lagii. keep it UP Fatima.

Allah kare zor e qalam aur ziyaada.

mujhe yeh ash'aar bahot pasand aaye.

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

[fatimah]

aslaam_u_alikam

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

W salam,



woooooooow kyaa baat hai bahooot hi zabardast aur ghazeb ki kavish likhi tumnien chhoooti waise to poori ghazal hi zabardast hai lekin mujhe chand ashaar behud pasand aaye dili daad qabool karo khush raho

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

kya kehnien


ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

aur yeh misraa to humien dil mien chubh gayaa teer ki tareh

aslaam_u_alikam

big b bohat bohat shukriya

[Abdullah Nazir]

MuHtaramah
Fatima Saahibah

Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,

Aapki ghazal pasand aayi jis per apni tafseeli aaraa pesh karrahaa hooN jin se aapka muttafiq hounaa zaroori nahiN.

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

Bahut achcha maTlaA hei

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

Pahle misreA meiN lafz "dekheN" "haiN" ke saath ghair munaasib maAloom hourahaa hei. Is ko yooN kiyaa jaasaktaa hei:
aankheiN bichii houi heiN tire intizaar meiN

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

doosre misreA meiN lafz "dil" ko dobaarah isteAmaal karne se bachne ke liye yooN kahaa jaasaktaa hei:
jisko mudaam tujh se shikaayat hazaar hei

ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

Doosra misraA beHr se khaarij hei warnah lafz kiyooN ke do harfaoN (ye aur wao) ko girana paRrahaa hei. Isko yooN kiyaa jaasaktaa hei:
lekin Ajeeb sii tiri yeh rehguzaar hei

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

Doosre misreA meiN lafz "daraaR" qaafiye ke Taur per isteAmal karnaa ghalaT hei. Is misreA ko yooN kiyaa jaasaktaa hei:
kiyooN be ta'Alluqi kaa dilaoN meiN ghubaar hei

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

Yeh sheAr theek hei.

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

yeh sheAr bhii achcha hei.

Chauthaa sheAr jo aek husn-e-maTlaA hei usko tarteeb ke liHaaz se doosre number per hounaa chaahiye.

Aakhir meiN, aapki apni is achchi kaavish per meri daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool keejiye.



Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.

[fatimah]

aslaam_u_alikam

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

Salaam Fatima

Ye aapki doosri ghazal paDi haiy, aur kehna paDta haiy, waah bohot khoob likhtin hain aap, ghazal me kamaal ki rawaangi haiy. saare hi ashaar bohot pasand aaye, yun lagha jeyse aap humare dil ki baat kar rahin hain. Allah kare zor-e-kalaam aur ziyada.

Safiya

aslaam_u_alikam

safiya ji gazal ko pasand kerney ka behad shukriya

[fatimah]

fatima saHiba:

salaam arz hai

aap ki ye ghazal pehle bhi paRhi aur bahot pasand aayee. aap ke kalaam mein roz.ba.roz nikhaar aata jaa rahaa hai.

is umda kawish per daad aur mubarak.baad qubool kijiye

amjad

aslaam_u_alikam

bohat shukriya amjad sahib

[irfan abid]

fatima sahiba, aadaab!

aap kii Ghazal pasand aayii. daad qubuul farmaaiye!

niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:

[fatimah]

salaam fatima,

kaisi ahiN? aapkii Gahzal nazar guzaar huii aur baa'is-e-lutf huii. bahot achchhi Ghazal kahii hai aapne. ash'aar ke mazaameen qaabil-e-sataaish haiN. zabaan kii bandish chust hai magar is par thoRii bahot mazeed behtarii kii jaa saktii hai. ab tak kii aapkii GhazloN meN mujhe yeh Ghazal sab se ziyaada achchhi lagii. keep it UP Fatima.

Allah kare zor e qalam aur ziyaada.

mujhe yeh ash'aar bahot pasand aaye.

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

aslaam_u_alikam

hashmet sahib is pazeraaii ka shukriya

[Mahtab Qadr]

aslaam_u_alikam

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

Fatima sahiba
aapki ghazal parhi , aapke khyalaat pasand aaye. ghazal ke baaz ashaar qabil e islaah haiN, webmaster ki raye ne aapko kafi rahnumai di hogi. umeed ke aap aaati aur apnaa kalaam pesh karti raheiNgi
shukria
Mahtab Qadr

[fatimah]

MuHtaramah
Fatima Saahibah

Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,

Aapki ghazal pasand aayi jis per apni tafseeli aaraa pesh karrahaa hooN jin se aapka muttafiq hounaa zaroori nahiN.

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

Bahut achcha maTlaA hei

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

Pahle misreA meiN lafz "dekheN" "haiN" ke saath ghair munaasib maAloom hourahaa hei. Is ko yooN kiyaa jaasaktaa hei:
aankheiN bichii houi heiN tire intizaar meiN

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

doosre misreA meiN lafz "dil" ko dobaarah isteAmaal karne se bachne ke liye yooN kahaa jaasaktaa hei:
jisko mudaam tujh se shikaayat hazaar hei

ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

Doosra misraA beHr se khaarij hei warnah lafz kiyooN ke do harfaoN (ye aur wao) ko girana paRrahaa hei. Isko yooN kiyaa jaasaktaa hei:
lekin Ajeeb sii tiri yeh rehguzaar hei

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

Doosre misreA meiN lafz "daraaR" qaafiye ke Taur per isteAmal karnaa ghalaT hei. Is misreA ko yooN kiyaa jaasaktaa hei:
kiyooN be ta'Alluqi kaa dilaoN meiN ghubaar hei

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

Yeh sheAr theek hei.

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

yeh sheAr bhii achcha hei.

Chauthaa sheAr jo aek husn-e-maTlaA hei usko tarteeb ke liHaaz se doosre number per hounaa chaahiye.

Aakhir meiN, aapki apni is achchi kaavish per meri daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool keejiye.



Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.

aslaam_u_alikam

sab sey pehley to der sey javaab deney per mazrat khuvaaN hun.

aap ki in tajaveez key liya main aap ki behad mumnoon hun.
isii terha aapnii raaye sey navaztey rahiye ga.
behad shukriya.

[najma]

aslaam_u_alikam

ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey
khaamosh hun magar meraa dil bekaraar hey

aankhien yeh raasta teraa dekhein hain baar baar
aur ab bhi bepanaah mujhey tujh sey pyaar hey

her dam key jhootey wadon sey yeh dil figaar hey
is dil ko merey tujh sey shikayat hazaar hey

ser kham kiyaa hai tere sabhi faisloN pe aaj
jaane kyuN ajnabi tiree ye rahguzaar hai

mosam key saath saath hi rishtey badal gaye
aane lagee vafaaoN mein kaisi daraar hai

tanhaa hi tey karen ge safar zindagii ka ab
veeraan raastoN mein ye dil sogvaar hai

aati haiN ye sadaaiN mire dil se baar baar
ae dost aa bhi jaa keh teraa intizaar hey

bohat khoob fatima
daad hazir hay

[fatimah]

Fatima,

salam.

aapki ghazal dekhi aur bohat apsand aayi ache ashaar likhe hain, aur Ustad ji ke mashware ke saath agar ise paRho tou aur bhi khoobsurat lag rahi hai.

ise dobara pesh kerdein.

bohat umdah ghazal per mubarakbaad qubool keejiye.

sara

aslaam_u_alikam

shukriya sara jii