Aik Taazatareen ghazal

Kuhnah mashq ShoAraa kaa kalaam jo beHr meiN hounaa zaroori hei

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Mahtab Qadr
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Aik Taazatareen ghazal

Post by Mahtab Qadr »

Aik Taaza ghazal ke saath hazir huva hoN ,dua kijye ke hazir hota rahoN.
Ghazal
ek aik kiran madoom huvi, sab aaNk ke taaray toot gaye
halaat badalnay lagte hi, sab yaar hamaaray toot gaye

phir zabt ka daman choot gaya, phir dil pe raha kab apna bas
maujoN mai jo shiddat aai thi, daryaa ke kinaaray toot gaye

kuch sheesh mahal se manzar jou, palkoN pe sajaye rakhe thay
pathraao ka mousam kia aaya, vo saaray nazaaray toot gaye

jo andhay saNp ko chiryaa se pairhoN mai ghiza pahoNchata hai
vo aik sahaara kaam aaya , jab saray sahaaray toot gaye

mahtab adaaiN chahat ki mausam ke mutabiq hoti haiN
dushman ki adawat joN ki tuN, aur pyaar se pyaaray toot gaye
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shukria

Post by Mahtab Qadr »

Sara ji Aadaab o tasleem
khairmaqdam aur ghazal ki pazeerai ke lye mashkoor hoN , dua kijye ke sab khairiat se hi raheiN.
shukria
Mohtaaj e dua
Mahtab Qadr
sara_j wrote:Mahtab sahib,

adaab arz hai.

Khushamdeed....... :-) bohat din baad tashreef laaye umeed ke sab khairiyet hai.

ghazal bohat mutassir kun ashaar se bharpoor hai..........

Mahtab adaayein chaahat ki mausam ke mutabiq hoti hain
dushman ki adawat joon ki toon aur pyar se pyaare toot gaye!

wah wah! kya maqta hai.............daad qubool keejiye.

Sara
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Mahtab Qadr
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shukria

Post by Mahtab Qadr »

Sara ji Aadaab o tasleem
khairmaqdam aur ghazal ki pazeerai ke lye mashkoor hoN , dua kijye ke sab khairiat se hi raheiN.
shukria
Mohtaaj e dua
Mahtab Qadr
sara_j wrote:Mahtab sahib,

adaab arz hai.

Khushamdeed....... :-) bohat din baad tashreef laaye umeed ke sab khairiyet hai.

ghazal bohat mutassir kun ashaar se bharpoor hai..........

Mahtab adaayein chaahat ki mausam ke mutabiq hoti hain
dushman ki adawat joon ki toon aur pyar se pyaare toot gaye!

wah wah! kya maqta hai.............daad qubool keejiye.

Sara
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rahmed25682
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Post by rahmed25682 »

Janab Mahtab sahab ..

AADAAB ...

aik achhy ghazal hum sub k saath share kernay ka be-hadd shukriya ..

ALLAH karay zor-e-qalam aur ziada.

Khush rahain

Khair Andesh

Raheel Ahmed
Kab Say HooN , Kia BataaooN Jahan-e-Kharab Main
Shab-Haaye Hijr Ko Bhee RakhooN Gar Hisab Main
=============================
Ghalib
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Post by jawaid badauni »


Azeezi Mahtab Qadr Sb, Aadaab

Bahut haseen ghazal se nawaza hia aap ne. Mujhe bahut pasand aai. Daad qubool kijiye. Sirf itna arz karooNga keh matlay ke misrA-e-caani men kuch wazn ki ghaltee lagtee hai zara dekh lijiyega. Aap shayad "halat badlee raftah raftah" type karna chaahte thay magar type kuch aur kar gaye haiN jis se misArey ka wazn mutAAcir hoa hai. Ummid hai mashwarah nagawaare Khatir nah hoga.

Ek baat yeh bataaiye keh aap they kahaN. MaiN ne aaj arce bAAd aap ki koii Ghazal dekhi hai. Ummid hai mizaj bahair hoNge aur ab app tamam chaupaloN men aate rahenge.

Khulooskar,
Jawaid
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sbashwar
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Post by sbashwar »

Janaab Mahtab Qadr Saahib
ASAK
Wah, bohat achi ghazal hai. Daad qubool kijiye.
Salem Bashwar
سالم احمد باشوار
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Mahtab Qadr
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Shukria

Post by Mahtab Qadr »

Aadaab Raheel sahib
behad mashkoor hoN aapki is adab nawazee ka.
Mahtab Qadr
rahmed25682 wrote:Janab Mahtab sahab ..

AADAAB ...

aik achhy ghazal hum sub k saath share kernay ka be-hadd shukriya ..

ALLAH karay zor-e-qalam aur ziada.

Khush rahain

Khair Andesh

Raheel Ahmed
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Abdullah Nazir
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Post by Abdullah Nazir »



Azeezi
Mahtab Qadr Saahib,

Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,

Aapki dilpazir o dilkash ghazal paRhkar bahut khushi houi. Saare ke saare ashAaar bahut hii achche heiN.

Is kaamyaab kaavish per khaaksaar kii daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye.

Teesre sheAr meiN roman meiN jou likhkhaa houaa hei wo urdu meiN likhkhe houe miSreA se behtar hei agar lafz "thay" kii bejaa takraar ko zehn meiN rakhkheN tou. Ummeed ke urdu meiN aap isko theek karlenge.


Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.
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Mahtab Qadr
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Jawaid sahib Eid Mubarak

Post by Mahtab Qadr »

Aadaab Jawaid sahib
Is hauslaafza pazeerai ka behad shukria jis baat ki taraf aapne ishaara kia vo nazr e saani karli gai hai. shukria.
janab mai yahiN hoN jeddah mai jahaan tha :) inshallah mulaqat hoti rahegi urdubandhan mai.
Eid Mubarak
Mahtab Qadr
jawaid badauni wrote:
Azeezi Mahtab Qadr Sb, Aadaab

Bahut haseen ghazal se nawaza hia aap ne. Mujhe bahut pasand aai. Daad qubool kijiye. Sirf itna arz karooNga keh matlay ke misrA-e-caani men kuch wazn ki ghaltee lagtee hai zara dekh lijiyega. Aap shayad "halat badlee raftah raftah" type karna chaahte thay magar type kuch aur kar gaye haiN jis se misArey ka wazn mutAAcir hoa hai. Ummid hai mashwarah nagawaare Khatir nah hoga.

Ek baat yeh bataaiye keh aap they kahaN. MaiN ne aaj arce bAAd aap ki koii Ghazal dekhi hai. Ummid hai mizaj bahair hoNge aur ab app tamam chaupaloN men aate rahenge.

Khulooskar,
Jawaid
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Mahtab Qadr
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Salem bhai

Post by Mahtab Qadr »

Salem bhai Walaikum salaam
Behad shukria ghazal ki sitayesh ka. Jazak Allah khair
Mahtab Qadr
sbashwar wrote:Janaab Mahtab Qadr Saahib
ASAK
Wah, bohat achi ghazal hai. Daad qubool kijiye.
Salem Bashwar
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Mohatram Abdulah bhai

Post by Mahtab Qadr »

Assalam Alaikum wa rahma
Aap ki purkhuloos pazeerai aur ghazal ki tareef o sitayesh ne mere hausle barha diye. behad mamnoon hoN aapka. aap ne jis misre ki taraf nishandahi farmai hai usay inshaallah waisa hi karloNga. JazakAllah khair
Mahtab Qadr
WEBMASTER wrote:

Azeezi
Mahtab Qadr Saahib,

Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,

Aapki dilpazir o dilkash ghazal paRhkar bahut khushi houi. Saare ke saare ashAaar bahut hii achche heiN.

Is kaamyaab kaavish per khaaksaar kii daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye.

Teesre sheAr meiN roman meiN jou likhkhaa houaa hei wo urdu meiN likhkhe houe miSreA se behtar hei agar lafz "thay" kii bejaa takraar ko zehn meiN rakhkheN tou. Ummeed ke urdu meiN aap isko theek karlenge.


Aapka Mukhlis,
Nazir.
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Sarwar A. Raz
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Post by Sarwar A. Raz »

mukarramee Mahtab Qadr SaaHeb: aadaab!

ek muddat ke ba'd meHfil meN aayaa to aap kee yeh pursoz Ghazal dekh`ee. Khair to hai? aaKhir aisee bh`ee kyaa maayoosee? :-)

neeche apne Khayaalaat likh` rahaa hooN. yeh iSlaaH hargiz naheeN hai bal.k soch kaa ek qadre muKhtalif andaaz hai. dekh` lene meN harj naheeN hai. yeh kehnaa teHSeel-e-laa-HaaSil hei keh mere kisee Khayaal se aap kaa muttafiq honaa Z^arooree naheeN hai!
----------------------------------
ek aik kiran madoom huvi, sab aaNk ke taaray toot gaye
(har ek kiran ma'doom huyee, sab aaNkh` ke taare TooT gaYe)
halaat badalnay lagte hi, sab yaar hamaaray toot gaye
(ik aaNkh` hamaaree kyaa jh`apkee, sab yaar hamaare TooT gaYe)

"Haalaat badalne lagte hee" Ghair-faSeeH aur Ghalat^ bandish hai. is ko badal deN to behtar hai. Hairat hai keh Amjad SaaHeb ne is ko nazar-andaaz kar diyaa!
----------------------------
phir zabt ka daman choot gaya, phir dil pe raha kab apna bas
(ph`ir Z^abt^ kaa daaman ch`ooT gayaa, ph`ir ham se koyee rooTh gayaa)
maujoN mai jo shiddat aai thi, daryaa ke kinaaray toot gaye
(maujoN kaa woh zor Allah, Allah!, daryaa ke kinaare TooT gaYe)

pehle miSre' kaa aaKhiree HiSSah kamzor saa lagaa. ho saktaa hai keh meree hee nazar kaa quSoor ho. :maujoN meN jo shiddat aayee th`ee: mere sar se guzar gayaa!
----------------------------
kuch sheesh mahal se manzar jou, palkoN pe sajaye rakhe thay
(kuch` sheesh-maHal ummeedoN ke, palkoN pe sajaaYe rakkh`e th`e)
pathraao ka mousam kia aaya, vo saaray nazaaray toot gaye
------------------------------
jo andhay saNp ko chiryaa se pairhoN mai ghiza pahoNchata hai
vo aik sahaara kaam aaya , jab saray sahaaray toot gaye
------------------------------
mahtab adaaiN chahat ki mausam ke mutabiq hoti haiN
dushman ki adawat joN ki tuN, aur pyaar se pyaaray toot gaye

is she'r meN miSro'N kaa baahimee rabt^ Saaf naheeN hai. waZ^aaHat kar deN to muZ^aa,iqah naheeN hai. shukriyah!

Sarwar A. Raz "Sarwar"
yooN aur bohat a'ib haiN :Sarwar: meN wa-lekin
kambaKht muHabbat meN to yaktaa nazar aayaa

Sarwar A. Raz :Sarwar:
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Re: Aik Taazatareen ghazal

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phir zabt ka daman choot gaya, phir dil pe raha kab apna bas
maujoN mai jo shiddat aai thi, daryaa ke kinaaray toot gaye

kuch sheesh mahal se manzar jou, palkoN pe sajaye rakhe thay
pathraao ka mousam kia aaya, vo saaray nazaaray toot gaye
wah wah wah bahut khoob kalaaam sunaaya aapne woh bhi ek arse ke gap ke baad.... ye do sher bahut pasadn aaye.... aur sarwar sahab ki tajweez bhi umda lagi...dheron daad haazir hai MAHTAB sahab...


Shumaila

Koi pooche humse hamaari haalat ka sabab
to ashk baha kar bhi baat adhoori reh jati hai

Waqt jaise kahin thehar sa gaya hai
Na Gham jaata hai na khushi aati hai
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Mahtab Qadr
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Behad Mashkoor

Post by Mahtab Qadr »

Mohatramee Janab Sarwar Raz sahib
Aadaab o Tasleem
Yaqeenan kafi muddat ke baad aapki tashreefawari sirf mere lye hi nahi balke urdu sites ke saare hi chahne waloN ke lye behad khushkun aur bayes e etmenaan hai. Ji Alhamdullah Khair hi hai inshaAllah, bas kuch halaat aur masayel ne ghair lia tha umeed ke jald hi inse chutkara miljayega Allah ki zaat se yahi umeed hai.
aapke zarreen mashwaroN ne behad mutassir kia yaqeenan asatizah ki sarparasti fikr o hunar ko chaar chand laga deti hai. mai ne aapki raye aur mashwaroN se behad istefaada kia hai jiske lye mai aapka mamnoon hoN.
Amjad sahib ne ghaleban azraah e murawwat us masale ko nazarandaaz kia hoga jiska aapne zikr farmaaya,
aapki aamad baharhaal ham sab ke lye mishaal e raah sabit hogi , tashreef laate rahiye aur hameiN apni qeemti aara se nawazte rahiye.
Mashkoor o Mamnoon
Mahtab Qadr

Sarwar Raz wrote:mukarramee Mahtab Qadr SaaHeb: aadaab!

ek muddat ke ba'd meHfil meN aayaa to aap kee yeh pursoz Ghazal dekh`ee. Khair to hai? aaKhir aisee bh`ee kyaa maayoosee? :-)

neeche apne Khayaalaat likh` rahaa hooN. yeh iSlaaH hargiz naheeN hai bal.k soch kaa ek qadre muKhtalif andaaz hai. dekh` lene meN harj naheeN hai. yeh kehnaa teHSeel-e-laa-HaaSil hei keh mere kisee Khayaal se aap kaa muttafiq honaa Z^arooree naheeN hai!
----------------------------------
ek aik kiran madoom huvi, sab aaNk ke taaray toot gaye
(har ek kiran ma'doom huyee, sab aaNkh` ke taare TooT gaYe)
halaat badalnay lagte hi, sab yaar hamaaray toot gaye
(ik aaNkh` hamaaree kyaa jh`apkee, sab yaar hamaare TooT gaYe)

"Haalaat badalne lagte hee" Ghair-faSeeH aur Ghalat^ bandish hai. is ko badal deN to behtar hai. Hairat hai keh Amjad SaaHeb ne is ko nazar-andaaz kar diyaa!
----------------------------
phir zabt ka daman choot gaya, phir dil pe raha kab apna bas
(ph`ir Z^abt^ kaa daaman ch`ooT gayaa, ph`ir ham se koyee rooTh gayaa)
maujoN mai jo shiddat aai thi, daryaa ke kinaaray toot gaye
(maujoN kaa woh zor Allah, Allah!, daryaa ke kinaare TooT gaYe)

pehle miSre' kaa aaKhiree HiSSah kamzor saa lagaa. ho saktaa hai keh meree hee nazar kaa quSoor ho. :maujoN meN jo shiddat aayee th`ee: mere sar se guzar gayaa!
----------------------------
kuch sheesh mahal se manzar jou, palkoN pe sajaye rakhe thay
(kuch` sheesh-maHal ummeedoN ke, palkoN pe sajaaYe rakkh`e th`e)
pathraao ka mousam kia aaya, vo saaray nazaaray toot gaye
------------------------------
jo andhay saNp ko chiryaa se pairhoN mai ghiza pahoNchata hai
vo aik sahaara kaam aaya , jab saray sahaaray toot gaye
------------------------------
mahtab adaaiN chahat ki mausam ke mutabiq hoti haiN
dushman ki adawat joN ki tuN, aur pyaar se pyaaray toot gaye

is she'r meN miSro'N kaa baahimee rabt^ Saaf naheeN hai. waZ^aaHat kar deN to muZ^aa,iqah naheeN hai. shukriyah!

Sarwar A. Raz "Sarwar"
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Re: Aik Taazatareen ghazal

Post by zmufti »

Mahtab Qadr wrote: phir zabt ka daman choot gaya, phir dil pe raha kab apna bas
maujoN mai jo shiddat aai thi, daryaa ke kinaaray toot gaye

jo andhay saNp ko chiryaa se pairhoN mai ghiza pahoNchata hai
vo aik sahaara kaam aaya , jab saray sahaaray toot gaye
Mahtaab saaheb
buhat khoob
meri janib se daad qabool kijye
regards
zmufti
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