Mairaj Faizabaadi ka kalam

[Mahtab Qadr]

ba.D gayaa thaa pyaas kaa ehasaas dariyaa dekh kar
ham palaT aaye magar paanii ko pyaasaa dekh kar


ham bhii hai.n shaayad kisii bhaTakii huii kashtii ke log
chiikhane lagate hai.n Khvaabo.n me.n jaziiraa dekha kar


jis kii jitanii haisiyat hai usake naam utanaa Khuluus
bhiik dete hai.n yahaa.N ke log kasaa dekh kar


maa.Ngate hai.n bhiik ab apane muhallo.n me.n faqiir
bhuuk bhii muhataat ho jaatii hai khatraa dekh kar


Khud_kushii likhii thii ek bevaa ke chehare par magar
phir vo zi.ndaa ho gayii bachchaa bilakataa dekh kar

[Mahtab Qadr]

beKhvaab sa'ato.n kaa parastaar kaun hai
itanii udaas raat me.n bedaar kaun hai


kis ko ye fiqr ke qabiile ko kyaa huaa
sab is pe la.D rahe hai.n ki saradaar kaun hai


diivaar par sajaa to diye baaGiyo.n ke sar
ab ye bhii dekh lo ki pas-e-diivaar kaun hai


sab kashtiyaa.N jalaa ke chale saahilo.n se ham
ab tum se kyaa bataaye.N ke us paar kaun hai


ye faisalaa to shaayad vaqt bhii na kar sake
sach kaun bolataa hai adaakaar kaun hai

[Hashmat Usmani]

salaam Mahtaab Qadar SaaHib,

kaise mizaaj haiN? ummeed hai ki ba_Khair hoNge

mai'raaj Faizaabaadii [mere paRosi shahr ke! ;)] ke jo kalaam aapne pesh kiyvo mujhe bahot achchhe lage. aapkaa teh e dil se shukria share karne ka. jazaak Allah.

[Abdullah Nazir]

Muhtarami
Mahtab Qadr Saahib


Purkhuloos Tasleemaat, :)


Aapki paish kii houii Mairaaj Faizaabaadi kii doosre ghazal meiN kuch typing ki ghalatiyaoN se 3 misreA be-beHr hougaye heiN:

SheAr / misraA

2./1
Is meiN lafz "hei" chooT gayaa hei aur misraA yooN hounaa chaahiye:

kis ko ye fikr hei ke qabiile ko kyaa huaa

3./2.
Is meiN lafz "ki" ziyaadah hougayaa hei aur misraA yooN hounaa chaahiye:

ab ye bhii dekh lo pas-e-diivaar kaun hai

5./1.
Is meiN alfaaz ki tarteeb ghalaT houne ki vajah se misraA be-beHr hougayaa hei. Shayad misraA yooN hounaa chaahiye:

ye faisalaa to vaqt bhii shaayad na kar sake

Ummeed ke meri raaye saHeeH hougi. Shukriyah.


Aapka Mukhlis,

Nazir.