Ilm o fun ke saiyebaN aik Ghazal

[Mahtab Qadr]

Khaleeji mulkoN se halaat ke taqaze par apne watan rukhsat hone holoN ko dekh kar kuch sher kahne ki koshish ki thi..aap bhi dekye aur raye se nawaziye.
shukria

Ilm o fun ke sayebaaN jaanay lagay
karwaaN ke karwaaN jaanay lagay

dhoop sahraaoN ki itni barh gaayi
tayeraan e khusbayaN jaanay lagay

barkateiN dastar ki kaise rook loN
ab to ghar se maehmaN jaanay lagay

shaam ka ehsaas hotay hi parind
apnay apnay aashaiyaN janay lagay

"Qadr" jin ke paas thi dil ki dawaa
baich kar apni dukaaN jaanay lagay

Mahtab Qadr

[Ibn-e-siddique]

Mahtab Qadr bhai:

assalam-o-alaikum

vaah janaab khoob ghazal sunaai aap ne. acha andaaz hai aap ka

Ilm o fun ke sayebaaN jaanay lagay
karwaaN ke karwaaN jaanay lagay

matla khoob hai, daad qubool kijiye

dhoop sahraaoN ki itni barh gaayi
tayeraan e khusbayaN jaanay lagay

khoob kahaa

barkateiN dastar ki kaise rook loN
ab to ghar se maehmaN jaanay lagay

khayaal to bahot umda hai, magar Mahtab bhai, doosre misra mujhe vazn se kharij lag rahaa hai, aap ne "mahmaaN" ka kia vazn iste'maal kiya hai. khudaara is per roshnee Daal ker meri mushkil Hal kijiye :)

shaam ka ehsaas hotay hi parind
apnay apnay aashaiyaN janay lagay

ye she'r bhi pasand aaya

"Qadr" jin ke paas thi dil ki dawaa
baich kar apni dukaaN jaanay lagay

vaah janaab, maqta bhi bahot umda hai, inte saada se andaaz mein aap ne b ahot umda ghazal kahi hai, meri jaanib se daad aur mubarak.baad qubool farmaain

amjad

[Hashmat Usmani]

salaam Sarfaraz saaHib,

aapkii Ghazal paRh kar aapke dil kii kaifiiyat samajh rahaa huuN. aapkii Ghazal bahot pasand aayii...aapne har she'r par kaafii Ghaur o fikr sarf kii hai aur aap kaamiyaab rahe haiN. DheroN daad aur mubaarak_baadeN, gar qubool uftaad.

kalaam share karne ke liye shukria aapkaa janaab.

Hashmat

[Mahtab Qadr]

barkateiN dastar ki kaise rook loN
ab to ghar se maehmaN jaanay lagay


"khayaal to bahot umda hai, magar Mahtab bhai, doosre misra mujhe vazn se kharij lag rahaa hai, aap ne "mahmaaN" ka kia vazn iste'maal kiya hai. khudaara is per roshnee Daal ker meri mushkil Hal kijiye "


Amjed Sahib salaam e masnoon

Huzoor mai ne 'mae-hmaN' bandha hai , mahmaaN nahi islye meri raye mai sher ka wazan mutasir nahi ho raha hai. ho sakta hai aapki nazar mai is lafz ka talaffuz dosri tarah se aaya ho. baharhal mai ne isay
maemaN , pasbaaN aur karwaaN ke qafiye par bandha hai na ke insaaN aur toofaN ke.

shukria
MahtabQadr

[Abdullah Nazir]

Muhtaram
Mahtab Qadr Saahib


Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,


Aapki ghazal bahut pasand aayi. Saare ashAar achche heiN. Meri daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye.

Mandarja-e-zail per Amjad Saahib kii raaye door'ras nahiN hei.

(((barkateiN dastar ki kaise rook loN
ab to ghar se maehmaN jaanay lagay )))

Lafz mehmaaN tou asl lafz hei hii lekin (sheAri zaroorat ke lihaaz se) baz asaatizah ke kalaam meiN lafz 'maeh'maaN" bar vazn "kaarwaaN" isteAmaal houaa hei macalan:

Zaki:
"khaataa hei aik aik ko taqreeb-e-ishq se
mehmaan-e-dil hei gham kabhi dil maeh'maan-e-gham"

Aatish:
"Aiy charkh-e-bemuravvat, bal be tunuk mizaaji
khush tere ghar meiN do din, ik maeh'maaN nah Thehraa"


Aapka Mukhlis,

Nazir

[Ibn-e-siddique]

Mahtab bhai aur moHtaram Nazir saHib

assalam-o-alaikum

maiN aap dono ka bahot mamnoon hooN ke aap ne is baare meiN meri rehnumaai farmaai.

dar.asl mujhe jo bhi baat samajh na aaye to maiN apni tashveesh ka izhaar kar deta hooN, aur isi vajah se bahot kuch seekhne ko milta hai.

agar maiN Mahtab bhai ke us she'r per savaal na uThaata to mujhe pata hi nahin chalta ke mehmaan ko "maahmaan" baandhne ki bhi ijazat hai

mere liye ye baat nayee thi aur mujhe jaan ke bahot khushi hui :)

umeed hai aainda bhi isi taraH rehnumaai farmaate raheN ge

bahot bahot shukria

amjad

[Mahtab Qadr]

Muhtaram
Mahtab Qadr Saahib


Purkhuloos Tasleemaat,


Aapki ghazal bahut pasand aayi. Saare ashAar achche heiN. Meri daad aur mubaarakbaad qubool farmaayiye.

Mandarja-e-zail per Amjad Saahib kii raaye door'ras nahiN hei.

(((barkateiN dastar ki kaise rook loN
ab to ghar se maehmaN jaanay lagay )))

Lafz mehmaaN tou asl lafz hei hii lekin (sheAri zaroorat ke lihaaz se) baz asaatizah ke kalaam meiN lafz 'maeh'maaN" bar vazn "kaarwaaN" isteAmaal houaa hei macalan:

Zaki:
"khaataa hei aik aik ko taqreeb-e-ishq se
mehmaan-e-dil hei gham kabhi dil maeh'maan-e-gham"

Aatish:
"Aiy charkh-e-bemuravvat, bal be tunuk mizaaji
khush tere ghar meiN do din, ik maeh'maaN nah Thehraa"


Aapka Mukhlis,

Nazir

Abdullah Bhai
Nawazish ke aapne asatiza ke kalam se misaleiN dekar mujhe aur dosre sathioN ki maloomat mai izafa kia.
aik misra mujhe yaad aaraha hai , ke

mae-hmaani bhi maizbaani bhi.

aap ko agar iska pahla misra yaad ho to zaroor nawaziyega.
shukria

[Mahtab Qadr]

Mahtab bhai aur moHtaram Nazir saHib

assalam-o-alaikum

maiN aap dono ka bahot mamnoon hooN ke aap ne is baare meiN meri rehnumaai farmaai.

dar.asl mujhe jo bhi baat samajh na aaye to maiN apni tashveesh ka izhaar kar deta hooN, aur isi vajah se bahot kuch seekhne ko milta hai.

agar maiN Mahtab bhai ke us she'r per savaal na uThaata to mujhe pata hi nahin chalta ke mehmaan ko "maahmaan" baandhne ki bhi ijazat hai

mere liye ye baat nayee thi aur mujhe jaan ke bahot khushi hui :)

umeed hai aainda bhi isi taraH rehnumaai farmaate raheN ge

bahot bahot shukria

amjad

Azeezi Amjad sahib
aap ne bahut acha kia ke apne shubhe ko door karlia hai. zaher hai ham sab seekhne wale hi haiN , ghalati insaan se hoti hai farishtoN se nahi aur agar aisa ho to tasleem karne mai mujhe bhi kahbi koi taammul na raha hai na rehega.
shukria
Mahtab Qadr

[irfan abid]

Mahtab Sb, aadaab!

aap ne ek aise samaajee mas.ale ko mauzuua-e-suKhan banaayaa hai jis kii jaanib kam logoN kii tavajjuh jaatii hai. umdah bayaan ke saath saath aap intiKhaab-e-mauzuua ke liye bhii daad ke mustahiq haiN. so qubuul farmaaiye!

aap kii Ghazal dekh kar ye jaanne kaa ishtiyaaq huaa ki aaKhir Khaleej meN aise kyaa haalaat dar.pesh haiN jinhoNne fankaaroN ko ruKhsat par aamaada kar diyaa hai. aap kaa ishaaraa vahaaN ke aam iqtisaadii haalaat kii jaanib hai yaa Khaas adabii fazaa kii jaanib? zahmat na ho to is par kuchh roshnii Daaliye.

niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:

[Mahtab Qadr]

Mahtab Sb, aadaab!

aap ne ek aise samaajee mas.ale ko mauzuua-e-suKhan banaayaa hai jis kii jaanib kam logoN kii tavajjuh jaatii hai. umdah bayaan ke saath saath aap intiKhaab-e-mauzuua ke liye bhii daad ke mustahiq haiN. so qubuul farmaaiye!

aap kii Ghazal dekh kar ye jaanne kaa ishtiyaaq huaa ki aaKhir Khaleej meN aise kyaa haalaat dar.pesh haiN jinhoNne fankaaroN ko ruKhsat par aamaada kar diyaa hai. aap kaa ishaaraa vahaaN ke aam iqtisaadii haalaat kii jaanib hai yaa Khaas adabii fazaa kii jaanib? zahmat na ho to is par kuchh roshnii Daaliye.

niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:

Aap ke Ishtyaaq ka kia jawab doN ke mujhe aap ke sawal par apne aik aur sathi ka sher yaad aaraha hai jo inhi halaat ka shikar hokar apne watan wapis laut gaye..sher yoN hai

baaheiN sameit lieN hain jazeeroN ne indinoN
khana badosho chal parho ab chal chalaao hai

ji haN yahi kuch ho raha hai. jobs ko qoomiaaya jaye to ajnabioN ka kia kaam. islye bahut sukhanwaran e urdu adab yahaN se ja chuke jo bachay haiN vo aapis mai uthna baithna kam karchukay mail milaap bhi pahle jaisa nahi raha. bahut makhsooos adabi anjumaneiN jo kabhi faa'al hua karti theiN ab taqreeban madoom ho chukeiN. iqtisaadi halaat par mai kia raushni dal sakta hoN ,halaat to achay haiN. albatta aik baat bahut ahm hai jo qabil e zikr bhi hai ke yahaN ab bhi in mushkilaat ke bawajood amn ka ratio dunya ke tamam mumalik se ziada bahtar hai. aur muqamaat e muqaddasa ke ahmiat apni jaga.
baharhal haal ahwaal poochne ka shukria.
mahtab qadr