hijr ki saat khudayaa ------ Muhamamd Khawar.

[muhammad_19k]

Salam Dosto,

Tabsira ke leeaye aik ghazal paish kar rahaa hooN. aor aap ki mohabbat ka paishgi shukarguzaar hooN.

choonke abhi sha'iri meiN nauwarid he hooN iss leeaye aap ka tabSiraa maire leeaye bohat mufeed ho gaa. khaaS tor par un alfaaz, tarakeeb, bayaanat ki baat zaroor kijiaye ga jo aap samajh na aa-aye hoaN ya jin meiN aap behtari ki gunjaish meHsoos karte haiN. aor agar aap ke zahn meiN koi behtar line aa-aye to zaroor tajweez keejiaye.

aap ka shukarguzaar,
Muhammad Khawar

Roman

1. hijr ki saa'at khudayaa ub guzar jaa-aye
waq mushkil hai bohat ya rab guzar jaa-aye

2. lab naheeN shikwaa kunaaN par dil ki hai khaahish
roz e furqat, shaam e waHshat ub guzar jaa-aye

3. sochna ub itnaa bhi achhchhaa naheeN hotaa
sochtaa reh jaa-aye too aor shab guzar jaa-aye

4. kyooN na taRpe dil kissi beemaar ka yakdam
ghar ke aage se maseeHa jab guzar jaa-aye

5. ho chukaa hai sabr ub, rukh se haTTe aanchal
phir guzarni ho jo dil pe sab guzar jaa-aye

6. daikh kar baRhti hoee bay taabiyaaN dil ki
ik tabssum uss ke zair e lab guzar jaa-aye

7. daastan e gham mirii bhi kia raqam ho gi,
likhte likhte kia pataa kaatib guzar jaa-aye

8. zindigi meiN waardaat e ishaq bhi :Khawar:
ik qiamat hai na jaane kab guzar jaa-aye.

[muhammad_19k]

Salam Dosto,

Un logoaN ka shukarguzaar hooN jinhoaN ne abhi tak ray di.

wasalam,
Muhammad Khawar.

[Muzaffar Ahmad Muzaffar]

mohtaram M Khawar SaHib aadaab-o-tasleemaat!

aap kee Ghazal par zeyadah kiya kahooN Sirf itna hee kahooN ga keh " har cheh dar-e-deg ast bah chamchah-e-me aaYad" aap kee is aek Ghazal se hee aap kee takhleeqee SalaHiyatooN ka baab kh~ul jata hai.

maiN agarcheh aap ke irshaad ke mut^abiq iz^haar-e-rae aap kee banae huwe makhSooS aor dil kash t^areeq par de chuka hooN. maiN ne is she'er ka intekhaab kiya th~a.


7. daastan e gham mirii bhi kia raqam ho gi,
likhte likhte kia pataa kaatib guzar jaa-aye

waese to saree Ghazal hee shahkaar hai. GharZ^ meree janib se sabh~ee asha'aar par dad-e-sukhan qubool kijiYe!

Wassalam
Muz^affar A Muz^affar

[sbashwar]

Mohtarami Khawar Sahib

Kal sirf vote desaka tha. poll mein sirf aik hi vote diya jasakta waqt wahid mein.

1. hijr ki saa'at khudayaa ub guzar jaa-aye
waq mushkil hai bohat ya rab guzar jaa-aye

Hijr ki saa'at... bohat khoob

3. sochna ub itnaa bhi achhchhaa naheeN hotaa
sochtaa reh jaa-aye too aor shab guzar jaa-aye

Yeh meri maujda tarze zindagi par bohat jam gaya.

4. kyooN na taRpe dil kissi beemaar ka yakdam
ghar ke aage se maseeHa jab guzar jaa-aye

Maseeha jab guzar jayee. Wah Wah. Bohat achcha sheir hai.

5. ho chukaa hai sabr ub, rukh se haTTe aanchal
phir guzarni ho jo dil pe sab guzar jaa-aye

Yeh sheir bhi pasand ayaa.

6. daikh kar baRhti hoee bay taabiyaaN dil ki
ik tabssum uss ke zair e lab guzar jaa-aye

Kal isi sheir par vote diya tha. Bohat khoob.

7. daastan e gham mirii bhi kia raqam ho gi,
likhte likhte kia pataa kaatib guzar jaa-aye

Yeh sheir par meine aik thandi saans leili hai. Bohat khoob

8. zindigi meiN waardaat e ishaq bhi :Khawar:
ik qiamat hai na jaane kab guzar jaa-aye.

Yeh sher bhi mere par jam gaya hai.

Shukria
Salem Bashwar

[muhammad_19k]

Walaikum us salam, Sara ji

khawar sahib salaam,

ab kya likhun...........shairi mein aap nawarid kahin se bhi nahi lagte

kuch dost barhaa bhi daite haiN zeb e daastaaN ke leeaye

aur phir mujhe tabsera karna aata hi nahi isliye sirf daad hi pesh

karsakti hoon jo aapko qubool karna hi paRega .

ji aap ka hukm sir aankhoaN par. daad ka bohat bohat shukriya.

poll mein main sirf aek shair per vote desaki jabke mujhe shair # 5

aur 6 bhi bohat pasand aaye hain.

Shaer 5 ka khayaal bohat puraanaa hai. bay sabri deedar par bohat kuch likhaa ja chukaa hai laikin mein is kafiat ko bayaan karnaa chah rahaa thaa iss leeaye meiN ne iss shaer ko barqaraar rakhaa. Shaer 6 mujhe bhi pasand hai. ab aap ko bhi achchha lagaa to kuch HoSlaa huwa hai.


Aap ke tabSiraa ke leeaye mamnoon,
Muhammad Khawar.

[muhammad_19k]

Mohtaram Muzaffar Sb,

Salam o Adab qabool keejiaye.

mohtaram M Khawar SaHib aadaab-o-tasleemaat!

aap kee Ghazal par zeyadah kiya kahooN Sirf itna hee kahooN ga keh " har cheh dar-e-deg ast bah chamchah-e-me aaYad" aap kee is aek Ghazal se hee aap kee takhleeqee SalaHiyatooN ka baab kh~ul jata hai.

ye jo aap ne farsi ke alfaaz istemaal keeaye haiN in ki mujhe samajh naheeN aai laikin saray jumle ka kuch kuch mafhoom samajh meiN aa gia hai. aisaa lagtaa hai jaise aap mairi ta'areef kar rahaiN. aor tareef bhi aisi jis ke meiN qabil naheeN.

maiN agarcheh aap ke irshaad ke mut^abiq iz^haar-e-rae aap kee banae huwe makhSooS aor dil kash t^areeq par de chuka hooN. maiN ne is she'er ka intekhaab kiya th~a.


7. daastan e gham mirii bhi kia raqam ho gi,
likhte likhte kia pataa kaatib guzar jaa-aye

aap ke izhaar e ra-aye ka shukriyaa. meiN ne ye tareeqa kaar iss leeaye kiyaa ke ziadaa taake mujhe apne ashaar ka maiyaar behtar karne meiN aasaani ho. yaqeenun aap jaise ahle ilm oar ahle zouq hazrat jis shaer ko :nisbatun behtar: kehaiN ge mujhe apne baaqi ashaar ko bhi ussi sataaH par laanaa hoga.

waese to saree Ghazal hee shahkaar hai. GharZ^ meree janib se sabh~ee asha'aar par dad-e-sukhan qubool kijiYe!

aap ki daad ka shukriyaa.


Iss daad oar mohabbat ke leeaye mamnoon,
Muhammad Khawar Siddiqui.

[muhammad_19k]

Janab Saleem Bahswar Sb,

waaliakum us Salam,
Mohtarami Khawar Sahib

Kal sirf vote desaka tha. poll mein sirf aik hi vote diya jasakta waqt wahid mein.

Ji aik hi par vote diyaa jaa saktaa hai. aor mujh jaise shakhS ke koi aik shaer bhi aap jaise sukhan shanaas logoaN ke "nisbatan behtar" lagnaa bhi maire leeaye azaaz ki baat hai.

1. hijr ki saa'at khudayaa ub guzar jaa-aye
waq mushkil hai bohat ya rab guzar jaa-aye

Hijr ki saa'at... bohat khoob

shaer ki paseendgi ke leeaye shukriyaa

3. sochna ub itnaa bhi achhchhaa naheeN hotaa
sochtaa reh jaa-aye too aor shab guzar jaa-aye

Yeh meri maujda tarze zindagi par bohat jam gaya.

ye toa mairi khush qismati hoee

4. kyooN na taRpe dil kissi beemaar ka yakdam
ghar ke aage se maseeHa jab guzar jaa-aye

Maseeha jab guzar jayee. Wah Wah. Bohat achcha sheir hai.

acchcchai ki nishandahi karne ke bohat boha shukria.

5. ho chukaa hai sabr ub, rukh se haTTe aanchal
phir guzarni ho jo dil pe sab guzar jaa-aye

Yeh sheir bhi pasand ayaa.

6. daikh kar baRhti hoee bay taabiyaaN dil ki
ik tabssum uss ke zair e lab guzar jaa-aye

Kal isi sheir par vote diya tha. Bohat khoob.

pasandeedgi ke leeaye shukriyaa.

7. daastan e gham mirii bhi kia raqam ho gi,
likhte likhte kia pataa kaatib guzar jaa-aye

Yeh sheir par meine aik thandi saans leili hai. Bohat khoob

agar aap thandi saaNs ke baad Bohat khoob na kehte to mujh tashweesh ho jaati . daad ke leeaye shukriyaa.

8. zindigi meiN waardaat e ishaq bhi :Khawar:
ik qiamat hai na jaane kab guzar jaa-aye.

Yeh sher bhi mere par jam gaya hai.

aap ki aalaa zarfi oar HoSlaa afazai ke leeaye shukarguzar hooN.


Mamnoon,
Muhammad Khawar.